My smart girl 3. Rewriting our stars

I sat by Rose’s bed, unable to look away from her pale face or move even an inch. It felt like I was breathing only in shallow gasps. After the shock, I didn’t dare take a full breath, terrified of disturbing this fragile equilibrium. …This time we had saved her, but… another episode or two like this, and nothing would be able to save my girl. Her heart — the most precious thing I had in this world — was already working beyond its limits… and today it had stopped. I drew a ragged breath, closed my eyes for a moment, then stared at the steady drip of medicine in the IV. Ten’s voice still echoed in my head, now carrying the first hints of despair… --- “Clear!” “No pulse,” Jisoo said tightly, eyes fixed on the monitor and its unrelenting flat line. The second Rose’s heart stopped, I was on her, performing chest compressions and rescue breaths on pure instinct. Even though my own lungs felt paralyzed, I kept going. But nothing changed. The flat line continued mercilessly. Ten had to physically drag me off her to use the defibrillator. We had only three minutes. Every second counted. I stood frozen, seeing nothing but her snow-white face and lips turning blue. “Again! Clear!” Ten commanded, gripping the paddles. Rose’s body arched violently. It felt like the electricity tore through me too. Yet the monitor kept screaming its lifeless tone. “Pulse absent.” My own heart thundered in my ears. Time was slipping away. My girl still wasn’t breathing. “Charge to three hundred! Clear!” Ten roared. *God, I’m begging you… please…* “Pulse fifty beats per minute. Pressure eighty over sixty. Condition stable,” Jisoo finally exhaled. …Only then could I breathe again. Together with her. --- It felt like I had recited every prayer I’d ever known today, though I’d never been a religious man. Saving Rose was nothing short of a miracle. Today I had almost lost her. And I had nearly died right alongside her. My poor baby… My sweet, defenseless little doe. Even now, though we had stabilized her, her condition remained critical. She was still balancing on the razor’s edge between life and death. My eyes burned with unshed tears. I leaned over her, gently tracing the contours of her face with trembling fingers, then pressed the softest kiss to her temple and froze — listening to her quiet, fragile breathing. The most precious sound in existence. “Why did you do this, my love?” I whispered, my voice cracking. “Trying to slip away from me again? Have I already bored you so much?.. We’ve only been married a single day, sweetheart… You still owe me three little ones, remember? You promised me a family…” A bitter, broken smile touched my lips, but the only reply was the steady beeping of the monitor. *Oh God… give me the strength to endure this…* I sank back into the chair, took her fragile hand in both of mine, and brought her cold fingers to my lips. I closed my eyes, warming them with my breath, desperately hoping she could feel me. “I’m right here, my everything… I’m with you. I will never let you go. Do you hear me? Never. Even if you try to leave me, I’ll follow you anywhere. You’re stuck with me, baby… forever.” --- A heavy hand settled on my shoulder. I looked up into Ten’s exhausted, guilt-filled eyes. “Jay, you’re dead on your feet. Go get some rest. I’ll stay with her.” I shook my head before he even finished speaking. “I’m not leaving until she wakes up,” I said hoarsely, my gaze returning to her peaceful, unnaturally still face. “I can’t… I can’t leave her, Ten.” “Jay… she could sleep for another full day. She’s stable for now. At least lie down on the couch in the lounge. I’ll call you the second she opens her eyes.” I knew he was right. But the thought of letting go of her hand even for a moment filled me with bone-deep terror. “Thank you, brother… but I’m staying.” Ten sighed, squeezed my shoulder one last time, and left. I rested my heavy head on the edge of the bed beside her hand. Exhausted, I closed my eyes and imagined her cool, slender fingers gently threading through my hair — the way I used to shamelessly beg her to do. “Stroke my hair, my love…” I whispered brokenly, pressing her palm tighter to my lips as hot tears finally spilled over. “Please… wake up and touch me again. I need you… God, I need you so much.” But she couldn’t answer. She was sleeping. Rose was somewhere far away, in a place I couldn’t reach… and every second without her was slowly destroying me.