Whispering Suits

Before we get home, Nat gives me one final piece of advice. “The deck you carry. It's incredibly powerful, Indy. It takes Fae centuries to learn how to use tarot, and it can take even longer to truly master it. Even then, Faeries are born with magic. Using the Tarot comes to us more naturally. You are a mortal, we don't yet know what using the cards might cost you. Just because you might have the ability to wield the cards, doesn't mean you should. I can't…Dan can't lose you to it too. Please. I need you to promise me you'll be careful. I don't want you using that deck. Not if you can help it”. I can tell she's crying as she talks, but she won't look me in the eye. I still feel like there is more she isn't telling me, but I don't know what the right question to ask is to get her to reveal more. I decide to be satisfied for the night, at least I know a little more about this deck, and about what happened that night when mum used it. She paid the price for calling on ancient Faerie magic, and that cost was her life. I can still see the image of the tarot card burned into her skin, right above her heart. It was a dark purple-black colour, like it had poisoned her. But, it had worked. That night, that horrid night, it was all my fault. I'd been fighting with mum, there was a music festival I really wanted to go to, but festivals are hot-beds for Fae. They can tempt humans, trick them into making deals, trap them with Faerie food, and generally run amok. Mum told me it wasn't safe, and I'd gotten frustrated. It felt so unfair, I'm 19 and I've never been to a live concert or festival. I love music, I play enough instruments to prove my dedication. I broke the one big house rule, I went out after dark. Certain Faeries, especially Winter Fae, thrive in the darkness. And, because there are less people around, the Faeries that are out can take bigger risks, which makes them even more dangerous than usual. I'd been mad, I hadn't thought about the risks. I just wanted to get some fresh air. I had gone to the park near our house. I don't know why, but I always felt calm there, it was one of my favourite places to be. But, of course, I wasn't careful. I didn't check my surroundings, didn't keep an eye out for any Faeries looking to cause trouble. I just sat on the bench near the old oak tree and cried. I didn't hear the Faerie approaching, at least, not until my mum cried out “Indy!”. Then I felt it, sharp claws that grabbed my arm tight. I can still feel the wound beneath my jumper, it's healing slowly and I know once it's healed it'll leave a nasty scar. I cried out for mum, and she came running. She managed to get it off me thanks to the iron dagger she always carried with her. But, the dagger got stuck in the Faerie and we had to run away. I thought we'd lost it, but I was in so much pain and mum was focused on how much my arm was bleeding, I don't think either of us realised it hadn't given up the chase. We made it back home, but the Faerie had followed us. My stupidity had lead it straight to our home. Sraight to Dan, who doesn't have the gift. Dan, who just saw a shadow, a giant shadow, and new that mum and I were terrified of it. He did couldn't see the Faeries true form, just watched in terror as I screamed for him to run. I don't remember seeing mum reach for the deck, but she must have, because next thing I new she was in front of us holding a single card in her hand. I didn't understood what she had planned, or I would have tried to stop her. But, then again, I was in pretty bad shape. Maybe I couldn't stop what was going to happen next. The Faerie swung for us, and Mum closed her eyes and pulled the card to her chest. I remember screaming, and mum shouted something but I couldn't hear it. Then, there was a blinding light. I must have passed out, because I remember waking up and Dan was sobbing and mum was laying on the ground. The Faerie was gone, there was nothing left of it but the dagger mum had stabbed it with earlier. But, mum was on the floor and she had that hideous mark on her chest where she'd held the tarot card, The Mother card. I asked her what I should do, and she told me to take the tarot deck. I told her I was sorry, and then she died. And every night since, I've dreamt of that moment. I've re-lived every bad choice, every stupid decision, that lead up to the moment mum died. And, what is worse, I can tell Dan about any of it. It's the first rule mum told me, when she realised I had The Sight too. We don't tell other mortals about the Faeries. It makes them targets, and without The Sight they can't defend themselves. Even if I did try and explain to Dan what happened, I'm not sure he would understand. I'm not sure it would help. He'd just be even more afraid than he is already, knowing that there are more monsters out there who can do far worse than the one we saw that night. I hug Nat goodbye at the end of our street, she tries to apologize again but I wave her off, I'm too tired to talk about it anymore. I need time to think. I say goodnight to Gran, and she tells me Dan has fallen asleep in his little hideaway. We agree it's best to leave him there, he looks like he might finally be getting some good rest. I decide to follow his lead, and head to bed.