Palette

Horace Slughorn was a man of many secrets. He liked to imagine his own mind as an old-fashioned desk in art-deco style, and this desk had too many drawers of all forms and sizes to be real. There were drawers with the secrets he was proud of, like those about his students who made it big with a little bit of help from his side. There were drawers with the secrets he was ashamed of that contained mostly secrets of his youth. He was a vivacious hedonist back then who knew no limits in his pursuit of the pleasures. There were small drawers with small secrets he wasn’t ashamed of but preferred to keep them shut to protect other people’s ego and himself from embarrassment of being untruthful in order to stay polite. There were two drawers in his memory-desk that he never dared to open, though. Because he was terrified of the secrets they contained. The first one was labeled simply “Tom”, and Horace made every effort possible but for the magic intervention to forget. He had a terrible feeling that one day he would need that secret, and tried to tuck it as deeply into his consciousness as it was possible. The second one was labeled “Lily”. Everybody liked Lily Evans because she was brave, smart, witty and very cute. Or, at least, at first. Horace knew a talent when he met one, and this young girl from a Muggle family had the natural abilities for Potions. She wasn’t afraid to experiment and to modify the recipes just enough to make them shine. She was so good that Horace made an exception. He offered a second year Gryffindor student to join his elite club. And Miss Evans looked at him with those impossible green eyes of hers and said “thank you but no thank you”. That left him speechless. Horace Slughorn lost that battle but not the war, and he kept on trying when a convenient occasion would occur. Lily Evans would always answer with a cheeky smile or a witty line, and that was enough to make Horace Slughorn smile back instead of feeling irritated. "Would it be so awful, my dear, if I helped you just a tiny bit?" "It wouldn’t be awful, professor. But I want to do everything myself. Otherwise, it’s not that satisfying." It was the fifth year of education when Miss Evans faltered. To be fair, this year had been a very difficult one for her as she had fallen out with the boy who was as gifted as she was and as unlikable as she was loved. Slughorn, of course, knew everything about their quarrel, as he enjoyed gossip and being informed but the way these two parted felt too bitter for such a young and gentle age. It was more of a sincere desire to make Lily Evans smile again that beautiful smile of hers when she would refuse his invitation yet again that Horace had invited Miss Evans to join the “Slug Club” for the pre-Christmas gathering. And when Lily suddenly accepted, for a moment the professor thought he had misheard Miss Evans. It was only later that Horace realised the reasons for her unexpected decision. It turned out that Lily Evans had agreed simply because she didn’t want to linger in the Gryffindor common room. Certain young Marauders were making peace and quiet impossible… But did that concern him? Not in the slightest! The party was a success. Miss Evans quickly became a highlight of the evening with her wits and charm. She enjoyed the music, the company of other members of the “Slug Club” and seemed to have brought the warmth of the Gryffindor’s fire with her. And it was her who, at the crowning point of the evening, had announced the “ladies’ choice” dance. Her beauty was as fierce as her green eyes were bright when she boldly invited none other than Slughorn himself to join her on the floor. "Come on, professor. It is impolite to keep a lady waiting," she said and there was fire of Gryffindor in her eyes. Horace was so taken aback that, for once, he did not manage to turn the whole situation into a joke. And by the time he thought to, it was too late. It was easy enough to hide the secrets about Tom Riddle in the depth of his consciousness because Horace never wanted to remember the brilliant boy he had once taught. It was impossible to forget Lily Evans because he didn’t want to forget her smile, and her laughter, and the gentle fragrance of her hair. He did not want to forget the sweet terror that made him freeze when he realised that all the boys and girls of the “Slug Club” had gone to the terrace to watch the fireworks, and there were only two of them in the whole room that suddenly seemed too vast and too dark. Horace did not want to remember the way Lily’s breath touched his skin when Miss Evans leaned closer and pressed her lips to his cheek dangerously close to the corner of his mouth. “Merry Xmas, professor,” she said quietly, smiled and at that moment Horace saw the beautiful young woman Lily Evans would become. “This one and many more yet to come.” Horace Slughorn keeps many secrets but none of them is as terrifying and beautiful as this one.