***
A purple fog filled everything. The shaky, fickle world swam even more strongly before my eyes. An… Understanding came. Why am I doing this? Is it my choice? I… I can do anything, anything at all, but instead of doing something really necessary, useful, interesting I do… what? I dance as Luna says, chasing the nightmares that maybe were created by her? But I can’t see the power, which is just a foot away! Bigger than Celestia’s! Bigger than Celestia’s, Luna’s and Cadence’s combined! If… I would travel across the worlds! I can make a human body, get back to the motherland, find my siblings! I would remember! Remember everything! Why? Everything that was there is over. I left. And those, who were with me, said goodbye to me. Forever. It means it’s time to live here. Live in comfort! Create a human body right here… Usual. Wieldy. Without these uncountable legs! With hands and fingers, which sometimes are quite needed. Even though mainly mental-wise… But why? Why do I need it here, in Equestria? I can make it even better! Create a body of a stallion! It would be more understandable and even more habitual. To trample on the dilemma that pops into my head with every visit to the shower! To run after Tia. Or Rarity. To run after Tia and Rarity! To live life to the fullest, without the constant dilemmas, the doubts, the discomfort! Without the fear of a close relationship! And without the equalogists! Yes, it would be so much better… nicer. More comfortable. No more dread of the thought of intimacy. Hm, it’s… Maybe, really?.. But the cost?.. Phew, gibberish. I can leave my own alone, but why should I care about the others? But again… No. I should think… I… I don’t need to dwell on it. Nightmare had been so eager to be acknowledged and admired… And I could do what I could to be admired! Like Tia! More than Tia! Build a castle higher than the Canterlot mountain! To bathe in the glory and admiration! No, it’s… But why should I care?.. No, impossible!..…
I squeezed my temples with my hands. The chaos of thoughts and images was overwhelming and maddening. I licked my lips — something warm and salty came into my mouth.…
The others… And my own?.. I can leave them alone. On the contrary! They can be protected so that no one will touch them at all! With a patron so powerful, no one would dare threaten them! I can create an army out of nothing! Golems, machines, undead — whatever you want! I can build a real fortress with traps, enchanted walls, and protective artifacts that would kill even Discord, Tirek, and Sombra put together! My own would be perfectly safe! I guess so… And a stallion body, too! As a nice addition! It could even be anthropomorphic! I could give everyone an anthropomorphic body! Why not?.. And also!.. No. No, damn it, I can’t! What am I thinking about?.. About the……
I gritted my teeth, clenching my head as it tried to burst. Shit, it hu-urts!.. I swallowed blood.…
Why did I think I was clutching my head with some “hands”?..…
Protect-protect-protect… They know me. Nightmare, what’s going on? What are you doing? They’ll understand. They’ll feel it. And can I really protect them? The power, the might, the adoration, the admiration… It’s never enough. In the pursuit of more, I… I’ll be a threat to them myself. N-no… I don’t want that… I don’t want that. I don’t want to! I will be a threat to everyone. I’ll protect no one. I will live off their fear. My own. Others. Any! All of them! Immerse myself in nightmare and feed, revel in their terror! Enjoying every sip, feeling my own power grow! NO!… No……
The pain eased, as if on second thought, it came again.…
Why it should be ponies? There are changelings, griffons… Who among my own people would judge? Who would even know? But they will all be safe! And I will be in a pleasant and comfortable body, surrounded by… They will not! The power will intoxicate. First the others. Then the ponies. Then my own. They will notice. They will understand. They’ll beg for mercy… No! I don’t want to! I can’t!…
I wiped the blood off my face with my wrist, smeared more on my fur, and struggled to get my trembling legs under me to try to get up.…
No way. I can’t do this. I’m not going to live… To exist like a parasite, oppressing and driving others to despair for my own sake. A nightmare is an intangible entity, it needs a lot of power to break into the real world and stay there, but I am a creature of the real world… To immerse the world in nightmares in dreams in order to become stronger in reality… And to turn into a monster that would be unmatched? Including in the eyes of “my own” when they find out? And then I’ll get them, convincing myself that a little won’t hurt. And then, gradually… No. The past stays in the past! Here, in the present, I can achieve anything on my own! I’ll build myself a reputation! I’ll build my own castle! And I can protect my pony by myself — that’s what I’m doing now! The human body… What’s in it for me now? It can’t fly, and… And I’m not used to it a little now… And the sex… Phew… And you’re offering me to betray everyone and everything at once, be like Luna just for… Just for the penis only?.. I burst out laughing hysterically, feeling my head throbbing and my throat burning, but unable to stop. D-damn… Are you fucking seriously?.. Yes, I am afraid and ashamed of my new sex and not eager to get used to it and adapt to it. But not so much as to turn into a drowning in terror and despair and reveling in his power inadequate monster, who has fallen to the dark side in the fullest and worst sense of the expression! No. I stopped laughing and straightened up on my trembling legs, involuntarily assuming a precise, etiquette pose. I blinked, struggling to focus the persistent violet blurring in front of my eyes and feeling the drying tears pulling at the corners of my eyes. I spit blood. I can do almost all of this on my own. Or with the help of friends, if my own abilities are not enough. Except maybe the problem with my sex, but it’s obviously not worth the sacrifice. And you, piece of astral, are a fabulous idiot, if that’s all you’ve managed to come up with as suggestions. The thick, opaque purple fog, which clearly outlined a grotesque figure, swirled back in front of me. The strong absorb to make them stronger. The weak are absorbed to make the strong stronger. By refusing to be strong, you are weak. You will perish. The understanding is gone. “It’s YOU who are going to die, bitch!” I grinned angrily, feeling a wave of anger rising from within me, making the blood run faster through my veins, directed at this creature of horror. “I remember you got beaten up once, and then you tried to run! But there’s nowhere for you to go, fucker, and I’ll finally finish what I started! And the fact that you’ve been chewing on Tia and Luna all these weeks isn’t going to help you, you cloud of semi-intelligent ectoplasm! Dreams are my realm!!!” The magic blew into the horn, trying to bend it to the ground and boil the reactor inside with its frenzied fury. Auf Wiedersehen, bitch!..…
I’ve made a mistake. Fuck. The gray corridor of an old Soviet bunker was strewn with a stream of black blotches, forcing me to pull back around the corner and press myself into the cold, bare concrete wall. The threat has passed, but I was in no hurry to jump up and rush somewhere, taking the crumbs of time from the prolonged battle for a breather, frantically sucking in the cold air, smelling of old dust, mold, and the distinctive stench of damp concrete. I inhaled as hard as I could, and then exhaled slowly, watching the puffs of steam escape from my mouth as I exhaled. However, I think steam was getting out of my own body… My heart was pounding in my neck, and with each beat I felt a pain in my head and horn, sweat flooding my eyes… I spit a thick saliva on the floor, and wiped my forehead with my wrist. That’s all, damn it. I can’t sit here any longer. Let’s rock ‘n’ roll. I pulled my disobedient body up from the dirt floor with an effort of will and aching muscles, and I put up my shield and crossed the dangerous corridor. Something rumbled behind me, making my tail flicker with static. Ha… yawned, asshole… Now through this hall into that corridor over there, and I’ll try to flank it… The creature clearly entrenched there with a purpose in mind, preventing me from attacking, thus putting me in an almost hopeless situation. Which I myself have contributed to… When I attacked Tia’s dream, the nightmare simply escaped as planned, leaving its stable area and entering the big world of dreams, so to speak. When I caught up with the cattle in the “neutral territory” I created my own stable area with both of us. A Soviet bunker that I remembered from some excursion or game. The ceilings, however, were somehow senselessly high for an underground fortification, either because of the habit or because of the presence of wings and the instincts associated with it. I don’t know. I’m fine with that. I stabilized the dream once more, so that it wouldn’t run away… and that turned out to be my fatal mistake. The monster, pinned against the wall, stopped running. First it tried to ride my brains out, and when that didn’t work, it started to fight back. And after some time we both realized that it was stronger. And now it suddenly turned out that it was not him who was locked with me in thick concrete walls, which are not easy to escape, but me with him! Damn… Here, in a place where, in essence, the power of reason and imagination decides, I was more skillful — trivially by virtue of origin, my attacks were much more crushing, I was additionally fueled by the Luna’s ritual… And the creature was faster — because of its origin and innate skill in creating any constructions with the ease of breath, and, worst of all, much, much thicker and tougher. It’s the essence of naked energy, fatigue means death for it, but it’s been eating away for a while, and, to be honest, it’s been eating away quiet gorgeously, having energy more than the whole world. Yes, it was about half its original size, but I was also literally falling off my feet, safely losing the battle of attrition… And now it was no longer him, but me with a dilemma. Will I try to break the stability of the bunker to be able to retreat — and be attacked in even more exhaustion while trying to do so. Or will I go for it, trying to implement an attack concept that would give me victory before I fell, which has frankly a shitty chance. Or I could hold on until the bunker itself lost its stability, which I have not kept up for a long time, and collapsed… The nightmare understood all this too, and entrenched in the corner hall, not allowing me to come closer. Apparently, he was preparing something deadly to kill me with a single blow. If he succeeds, then I will not wake up in my current state in reality. Even if I woke up now, I would feel absolutely fantastic… So. Here. This corridor is wider and shorter, plus you can try to create some false targets in the other two — there will be a chance to get to him and… I sighed tiredly. Fuck knows what “and”. No idea what to do. I just don’t have any energy to do anything to hit him. And the power from the ritual disappeared for good… I’ll have to thank the blue one if I survive — without her sorcery I would have run out a long time ago. And then probably still break her face for thinking of feeding this abomination by herself! Like we had no problems! I chuckled wryly. This irony… Suddenly there was a ripple wave through the space. It seems that my bunker is having a hard time… A chance to get out. Or all the preparation of the nightmare was that he was punching his own way out — but then I would have no respect for him at all… I listened to my senses and, spitting on the corridor, hurriedly, as fast as I could, tapped my three remaining shoes and one bare hoof on the dusty concrete in the direction of the outlined breach. “When orkz foll bakk it don’t count loss! Bekause zey orkz and zey go return, yez!” I tried to limp faster with a hum. They go return and strike everyone. I’ll put Cadence in charge of the support ritual, and we’ll pair up with Luna next time… I turned the corner and almost sat on my croup in surprise. “Luna?!..” “It seems I’m just in time.” The alicorn smiled faintly, sweeping a thoughtful gaze over me. “You have spare teeth, blue one?” I narrowed my eyes evilly. “I!.. Oh… Nightmare, I’m not mocking you at all.” She sighed and drooped. “This is a powerful enemy for any of us. And don’t deny your need for help.” “The ritual would have been enough!..” I grumbled, turning away to hide my blush. Idiot… “The rest of its energy has been depleted to breach a way… Here.” Luna looked around and cringed chilly. “A creepy place.” “Not very cozy at most.” I didn’t agree. “Okay… The monster is powerful. I locked us both in here, expecting to deal with him where he couldn’t escape. But the damned nightmare, when nailed against the wall, is quite a toothy bastard. And, bastard, stupidly very strong. I managed to deplete him by about half, but now he’s retreated to a dead room and is making something there. I’m guessing something deadly.” “In this case — be cautious, Nightmare. Of the two of us, it’s you he’s going to hit — your consciousness holds the place. If he can handle you, he can escape, and the ritual has taken a lot of my strength, I won’t be able to catch up with our enemy and put up a fight.” Luna frowned as she listened to the disposition and warned me. “Let me share my energy with you.” “Come on.” I downed my head, letting the blue one to touch my horn with hers and waving away in thought. It felt as if the recharge ritual was back in full effect. An invigorating force flowed into my body — if you could call it that — into the dream world, causing me to straighten up and thrust my chest out. My legs stopped to tremble with fatigue. Even the annoying taste of blood in my mouth was finally gone! “It’s all I can give.” The alicorn cut the link off, smiling awkwardly. “It’s fine. At least I can drag my own legs.” I bared my teeth in answer. “Well, let’s rip someone’s head, shall we?” The companion nodded, shaking slightly. “There’s a short way through here, but it’s narrow… Shall we go straight?” I glanced at the alicorn. “You know the place better than I do.” She shook her head in reply. “Lead us where you think it should be.” Okay… I sucked teeth and looked back and forth thoughtfully, but I moved toward the narrow technical corridor. With two of us, even if not in the best shape, we can cope in any case, so now it is important not to let the beast escape. In case the nightmare prepared exactly that. The staccato sound of our footsteps echoed faintly between the bare concrete walls. We’ll go to the intersection, and we’ll probably split up, hit from different directions. We’ll try to play bamboozle: one attacks, and when the enemy’s attention shifts to her, she takes cover, and the other attacks. We just have to figure out how to coordinate… Although… Man, that’s no good. He’s got more reaction speed than we do, he’ll catch us… Well, what then? An amorphous purple and black figure suddenly appeared at the end of the corridor. Fuck. It turns out he hasn’t been escaping. I frantically put up my shield, realizing I won’t make it in time. The creature opened its jaws, and a pulsating sphere, so black that it seemed to absorb the light around it, rushed into my chest through the narrow corridor. Damn-damn-damn! A wall on the left. A wall on the right. The ceiling is high, but there’s no space to open my wings… Fuck, what do I do?!.. It’s too late! It’s gonna!.. Fu-u-ucking he-el!.. “NIGHTMARE!!!” The telekinesis jerk was so strong that I almost got my skin inside out. My back hit the ceiling, knocking me out of breath. My head was saved by the helmet, but the tip of the horn still got some, and I was now clenching my teeth and feeling the tears in my eyes from the pain. My legs were scorched with the… breath of the Abyss — I don’t know what it felt like. The shell rumbled beneath me… A short cry of pain stunned me with understanding. …and hit Luna, who was following. The telekinesis disappeared, and I collapsed to the floor from a height of nearly four meters, knocking the rest of the air out of my lungs. My legs, my ribs, my chest — my everything was hit. The pain was brutal… Blood was oozing from under the skin that has been scraped by the encounter with the floor. My wing got some as well — a reflexive attempt to open them when falling in a high but narrow corridor only made it worse. Out of the corner of my eye, I managed to notice Luna collapsing on the floor — and, blinking, disappearing from the dream before she could fall. Bitch! Fucker! Fucking pig!.. Coughing, I struggled up the wall to my trembling legs. The nightmare still stood at the end of the corridor. The attack has cost him a lot of strength — he’s practically halved in size, only about a quarter of his original strength, and looks kind of… disheveled and unfocused after his attack. And Luna has recharged me… “You know what, motherfucker?” I wheezed to the parasite. “You were telling stories, that it was necessary to absorb others, and I didn’t agree… But now I’ll make an exception for your sake.” I lifted the shield and limped forward. A line of black smudges crashed helplessly against the dimly gleaming film. “Ain’t no power at all, sucker?” The nightmare, already a little flattened and coming to its senses, disappeared silently around the corner. “Run, run. I know where you are running to.” Turning around in the narrow corridor not without difficulty, I moved towards the breach, for a moment holding my gaze on the anthracite-black stain on the floor and walls, where Luna has met the killing attack of the creature by her own body… …destined for me. Damn it, Luna! I don’t… Yes, hell, I can’t stand her, but… but I haven’t been dreaming of her dead a while either, to be honest with myself. She… Damn… I hope she’ll be alright… “Thanks, blue one.” I whispered. “You’re an idiot, but thanks…”…
The nightmare and I arrived at the breach at the same time. Behind the breach, which resembled an open mouth with rotten rebar teeth sticking out crookedly and sideways, the fog of the “neutral space” of the dream world was graying. The stone crumble creaked and crunched beneath the hooves. In the corner of the compartment were piled the decaying remains of some furniture. They were mixed up with ancient Soviet gas masks, gnawed on by mice and rats, hung some rusty pipes, decorated with a once massive red valve, wires winding along the wall, going into the same rusty panel with a torn door, which was lying on the floor under it. Under the ceiling there was a light bulb hanging from a wire, blinking occasionally. Somehow it was a brand-new, modern LED… Let me leave. I’ll serve you. I shook my head, trying to shake understanding out of it, and grinned crookedly. “Scary, isn’t it, bitch? Don’t worry. It wouldn’t take long.” I rushed forward, reinforcing my shield. The beam stroked across the shield, and the nightmare seemed to drift to the side, evading a possible retaliatory attack. I retaliated with a volley of rotten planks and no less rotten gas masks, throwing them at the side of my opponent with my telekinesis. It could do very little damage… but it was enough to distract it, giving me an extra half an instant to get closer. With the sound of a broken string, a widening web of “Shock Net” ripped from my horn and touched the floor with its edge, instantly and senselessly digging into it. Damn it! Closer!!! The nightmare, apparently suspecting something, tried to break the distance, but was grabbed by both front legs and strung up in the air for a much-needed second. More!.. A second web ripped from the horn and finally pulled into the creature’s body, causing it to arch and collapse to the floor, its mouth open in a mute cry of pain. Even though the enemy had no nerves to be affected by this spell, in this world such a small thing was unimportant. What mattered was the concept behind the spell, what it represented in essence. Pain. And the nightmare felt that pain perfectly. I froze for a moment, feeling my sides shake, and the nasty ache of my horn and… everything else. I could hardly swallow the thickened saliva with the taste of blood. I looked at the monster that was squirming on the floor. I squeezed it with my telekinesis, taking away its mobility. “I’ve promised you, that you are going to be absorbed? Well, welcome to the dinner.” Understanding of fear was my answer. I smiled and opened my jaws.***
“Ph-h… Fu-uck… A-a-a… Kh…” Reality greeted me with deafening pain and burning all over my body. For a few seconds I tried to remember how to breathe. My head throbbed with an abominable pain, my horn burned, every bruised place in the dream world burned, my tongue stuck to my palate, and a salty crust of dried tears pulled down the fur of my cheeks. For at least a minute I laid and stared dumbly at the ceiling, trying to come to my senses. The large crystal that hung from the chains there was dim and dull. The darkness was only lighted by a single oil lamp for some reason — though my eyes were more or less content with that. Even the air seemed to burn out, becoming heavy and… empty. There was no longer any sense of magic all around the room. But there was a feeling that, despite my condition, I was the one with the most power. The power buzzed in my arteries and veins, causing the burning sensation. I think I overate someone… I didn’t absorb the whole nightmare, because I suddenly felt… guilty? I had a feeling that this way of gaining power was better suited to some demons, so it was just… disgusting to finish the job. So, after eating a little more than half of the beating nightmare in my grasp, I made him my servant. I forbade him to come near any alicorn or foal, and threw the vanquished and hopefully recruited enemy out of the bunker. This motherfucker was called Tantabas, by the way… Yeah. I sighed, and tried to brush away the mane that was getting into my eyes. Tried again. I lifted my eyes up indignantly — and stared in surprise at the purple starry sky. I caught it, touched it, trying to figure out how it felt. I don’t damn know! Ah, Sweetie will be upset… Finally, the pain and burning subsided a little, and I looked around a bit, regaining my senses… …and I jumped up from my bunk. I stumbled across the furrow in the floor, which has been cut on the place of the ritual drawing, as if it has been pierced by acid. Keeping my balance with difficulty, I came closer to Luna’s bedside. Fuck, fuck, fuck… I frantically pressed my ear to the alicorn’s chest. Boom… Boom… Shi-i-it… She’s alive… I could hardly swallow the lump in my throat. But alive, to put it mildly, barely. The heart is pounding barely audibly, the shallow breath is barely heard… And the mare herself looked as pale as a ghost. She’s definitively unconscious, pale as hell, with a faded mane that resembled straw, with trails of dried blood from her nose and lips, with her eyelids ajar. The latter frightened me like hell for some reason. “Yeah, blue one, you ain’t dying today…” I hurriedly lifted the alicorn onto my back, cringing from the phantom pain in my ribs. I opened the safe door, squeezed through, trying not to touch Luna, and frantically looked around the room of the magic laboratory for a normal bed or at least a couch. A table for small rituals, a drawing board, a bookcase… Nothing, shit! Shit! I pulled both bunks out of the spell chamber, ripped them from as if slightly burned stone. Then I put them together, writhing with the pain in my horn and burning all over my body, welded the legs together to keep them that way, put barely alive Princess on the resulting bed. I peeked out into the corridor. “A medic to the magic lab! Immediately!!!” My voice rippled through like a shock wave, doubling as I used the Canterlot Voice. I got back, looked at Luna. Alas, but I can’t do anything else. I’m almost zero at medicine… “Everything is gonna be alright, do you hear me, Lu? The doctor will come and give you an injection, and we’ll dance at your wedding! And drink to our victory!” I chuckled hysterically through my tears and collapsed onto the floor, feeling the last of my strength to do anything is going out of me. That’s all. I’m done. I can’t do anything else. What could be done is done. Luna will be resuscitated — is she an alicorn or what? And Tia will finally be able to sleep in peace. And have good dreams. We have won. Everything will be good now.