Not like a snake

      For the next few lessons, my new friend and I exchanged only brief glances—it didn't come to talking. The school day flew by surprisingly quickly, I didn't even notice the time that had passed. Maybe it's because my head is completely filled with Katka, who has so dramatically changed her attitude towards me? Most likely, it is, because only thoughts about her crept into my detached consciousness. Without noticing it myself, I was wondering how beautiful Smirnova was, after all. Her sparkling green eyes were no longer perceived as serpentine, searching for a victim, but rather as two crystal clear emeralds reflecting the whole world. The grin that almost never left her face doesn't seem so smug and sarcastic anymore. And long brown hair, gathered in a braid... Well, they're just great. This time, the reasoning was interrupted by Roma, who was shaking me by the shoulder with might and main. — Toha, Toha, are you alive there at all? — my friend asked, not without apprehension. — Already fucking... You've been staring at one point for ten minutes, what's wrong with you? — And? And... everything is fine... Yes, everything is fine. — it felt like I had just been brought out of some kind of trance. I was so lost in my thoughts that I lost track of time, and the perception of reality as such. — You know. Pyatifanov shook his head in disbelief. — It's hard to tell from you that everything is fucked up. First this shit in the morning, you sleep on the move all day, and now you finally understand what the fuck. Maybe we should go for a walk? You'll unwind at the same time. But the offer is tempting. It's been a long time since we've been going to Voltron outside of school — this was hampered by things that sometimes arise for each of us at the most inopportune moments. So, since we have such an opportunity, we need to agree. Before I knew it, I was already standing at the gallows in the company of Roma and Byashka. They, in turn, were discussing something animatedly, but all attempts to delve into their conversation were in vain — there was nothing left but to occasionally agree and nod their heads approvingly. — Well, that's how I, in short, gave him a hard time. Romka proudly finished his story, taking a slightly crumpled pack of Peter the Great out of his pocket. — Well, you're a beast, Romych, you're a beast. — the Buryat gave out, after which we laughed together. Our newly-proclaimed beast took three cigarettes out of a cardboard box with a deft movement of his fingers. He held one of them between his teeth, handed the other to Byasha, and the third, for some reason, to me. This is not the first time he has done this, even knowing that I would refuse. It's just that, according to Roma, everything should be "boyish", and the offer of a tobacco product apparently refers to this concept. That day, something went wrong in me. Honestly, I would have refused any other time, but not today. I didn't fully understand how the third cigarette ended up in my hands. — And that's our way, Antoshka. My friend patted me on the shoulder approvingly. — Joins the team, on. — the already smoking Byasha, who was sitting on a frozen snowdrift, spoke cheerfully. — Eh, Toha, Toha, if I knew that you would agree, I would have found a parliament somewhere. Roman laughed, setting fire first to his own and then to my tobacco unit. — Well, with dedication, so to speak. My hands were shaking, either from the cold or from excitement. Under Pyatifanov's approving nod, I took my first breath. Acrid smoke filled the lungs almost instantly, causing a short coughing fit, and after a couple of moments the realization of what was happening reached the brain, which, in turn, created a feeling of mild nausea. I don't know why, but I continued. After a couple of puffs, an unusual faint feeling of under-euphoria appeared somewhere in the back of my mind, which was accompanied by a short shudder of the whole body. Surprisingly, I even liked it a little. It seems that partial pacification has overtaken, and thoughts have begun to leave my head. The cigarette was finished, and the bull immediately flew into the snow. — What do you think, Tohich? Roma asked. "Can't you see it yourself?" It didn't make him feel childish, on. — N-unusual. I mumbled. — Listen, guys, I'm probably going to go. U-it's going to get dark soon, I don't want to bother my parents in vain. — Don't fall down there halfway, or the devil knows you. We shook hands, and then I headed out of the schoolyard. Due to the cold, I quickly recovered from the nicotine dose, but this strange feeling still haunted me. Hopefully, when I get home, my parents won't suspect anything. At the exit from the schoolyard, I was called out. Turning towards the building, I saw Katya running towards me. — Anton! Anton! The girl stopped and began to breathe heavily. — Is he completely deaf or something? You can't be bothered. — before I could say a word, the girl continued. — Okay, it's not that important. I wanted to apologize again. — But you already have... — they didn't let me finish. — I know. You just understand me... My conscience torments me... Suddenly, Katerina's face changed, and her voice became stricter. It's like a mother scolding a naughty child. — Petrov. — she moved closer to me and seemed to start studying, sniffing something. — Where were you just now? — I was walking. I mumbled, already knowing where this was going. — Let me guess. Smirnova blinked. — With Pyatifanov, right? Eh... Antosha, Antosha, didn't they teach you that smoking is bad? Katya's face showed that she was upset. — Fuck. I muttered under my breath. — Well, I am... — I was interrupted again. — Now there will be typical excuses about dealing with stress and so on, right? I was followed only by a guilty silent nod. — You see, you didn't choose the best way to do this. — And what do you think is the "best?" I grinned sadly. — And you'll find out very soon, Petrov, if you don't behave like a fool. Katya winked at me, slightly amused. After these words, Katerina abruptly approached me and touched her lips to my cheek. This seemed to be not enough for her, and the girl, moving a little higher, lightly bit my earlobe. — See you tomorrow, Antosh. Now I was standing alone, red as a tomato. What's gotten into her? In one day, Katya transformed from the most dangerous snake into an understanding person, and now she's openly flirting with me. But even though everything that is happening seems to me as strange as possible, I will be honest, after today's school day, my mood, and with it my morale, have significantly lifted. The only thing I was not particularly happy about was returning home. All the way, crunching the snow under my feet, I thought about how I would show up at home, what my parents would tell me about what happened the day before, how I would apologize to Olya. All these thoughts gnawed at my mind, but I tried to believe that everything would be fine. The journey home has never been so fast and at the same time painful. Even time was playing against me — it wanted to get me into trouble as soon as possible, arrange another quarrel with my mother and prevent me from apologizing to my sister. The last point worries me the most, because I am very afraid to injure the fragile childish consciousness of this cheerful lump of happiness. And the parents, on the contrary, seem to be trying to do everything for this. Their scandals are becoming more frequent and global — it's frightening. Do they enjoy exhausting and insulting each other so much? If you don't care about yourself, you should at least think about Olya... and now I'm already standing at the door, turning the key in the keyhole. For some reason, I remembered Polina's words about Katya and the fact that she allegedly resembles "the creak of unoiled door hinges" — my head is clearly not filled with what it should be. Meanwhile, I still listened to the sound accompanying the opening of these very doors. No — he is clearly not the personification of Smirnova. When I entered the house, no one cared about me, so nothing prevented me from calmly going to the second floor, straight to my sister's room. After standing next to her for a minute and gathering my courage, I opened the door to the "lair" of my little princess. I started to say, but quickly shut up, covering my mouth with my hand - my sister was sleeping carelessly. Apparently, the apology is postponed until tomorrow. As quietly as possible, I went to her bed, adjusted the slipped blanket and kissed her on the forehead, whispering softly: "I'm sorry. It's time for me to go on vacation too — today has exhausted me very much...