Berlin blood

Light filtered through the thin curtains. A small draft from the slightly open window was only beneficial for everyone present. The girl, whose pale face was like the moon, lay on the bed, almost not breathing. She had not regained consciousness all week and the nurses were already beginning to worry, however, as the doctor assured, everything was fine and she would wake up soon. And so it happened. The first time Hilda opened her eyes was early in the morning at dawn, which was not visible because of the ash. The moment Hilda opened her eyes again, Jacob and several other nurses were next to her, whom Dr. Mengele had instructed to monitor her and immediately report to him when she woke up. “Marlene, quickly call the doctor, she’s coming to her senses,” Jacob, jumping up from his chair, saw Hilda’s eyes clearing. It was truly a huge relief for him. He needed to confirm his guess that Hilda did not fall down the stairs herself, but was pushed by Louise. During the entire week that Hilda was lying in bed, Louise did not even come to her. Either because she was ashamed, or because she simply didn’t want to see her friend anymore. Louise herself was not overshadowed by grief for long and the very next day she basked in the attention of the SS officer who had just arrived, the adjutant, immediately noticing that he was taking a closer look at her. She was only too happy to take advantage of this opportunity. I immediately became a lady and no longer wanted to have anything to do with my friend, or with medicine, or with working here. Every time Jacob looked at Louise, who from now on, sitting with the camp commandant and her lover, about whom she spoke at every step, imagined how life would bring her to her knees. For he believed that everyone would receive exactly as much harm as he caused to the other. This is the law. Jacob himself, although he was not that religious, despite the fact that he studied at theological school, understood a lot from the point of view of religion and felt a lot. He was not popular among girls, he was modest, but when he saw Hilda, he immediately realized that they had met for a reason. He saw the sparkle and his life in her eyes, and, as his mother told him, this is the surest sign that your destiny is before you. Yes, Jacob understands that Hilda will not be with him, that she already has someone who has captured her heart, but for him the joy is simply to see her and understand that his true person exists. He appealed to the universe many times so that it would not give him the opportunity to fly into rage and take forever what does not belong to him. He understands that he can give her everything she really needs, but will this bring her happiness? No. She loves another, and only he can make the flowers of love bloom in her soul. Jacob cannot do this, no matter how hard he tries. All that remains for him is to enjoy every minute spent with her, wish her happiness and wait for the moment to get away from here as far as possible. When he became a doctor, he never thought that fate would lead him to a death camp. And instead of saving lives, he will watch as they are taken away one by one. He asked the question many times, why did she come here? Just for love? Or because you wanted to be close? Louise told how sad she was. Or maybe because she wanted to feel at least a little bit what he felt? Danger and death are behind you. At such moments, you begin to appreciate life and the opportunities that are given to us and which we do not notice. He thought about all this every night and came to the conclusion that he would be her guide. He completely entrusts himself to her and will always be by her side. The girl began to move her lips, and a minute later her voice was heard. - What’s happened? Where I am? — the girl slowly looked around, everything was unfamiliar and alien to her. — You’re in the medical bay, Hilda. You do not remember anything? — the nurse standing next to him immediately ran after the doctor. — In which medical unit and why am I Hilda? — the girl sincerely did not understand; Jacob read puzzlement in her eyes. “The doctor will come now and tell you everything,” Jacob sat down next to him. He sincerely began to worry about the girl, did she really not remember anything? Or maybe she’s just pretending because it makes her feel better? A minute later, a doctor enters the room. — What happened to the patient? — the doctor, in his own manner, sat down on the bed and, looking at the patient, asked: “How are you?” — Who you are? — said Hilda. — I don’t remember you. And what kind of place is this anyway? I can’t remember what I’m doing here. — Apparently, you have lost your memory. Maybe partially, maybe completely. In any case, lie down for now, and then you can take a walk if you have enough strength and…” he looked around at several people, looking for someone with whom he could leave the girl. “And Jacob will accompany you,” the doctor checked her pulse, examined the abrasions and left with the staff. Everyone left except the guy whom Hilda was vaguely familiar with. — Hello. My name is Jacob. You probably don’t remember me? — the guy looked at Hilda with all tenderness, and she examined him from head to toe. “I don’t remember my name,” the girl said with some irony. — They said the first name, but the last name.? “Exactly,” Jacob responded. — Your name is Hilda Schwartz. — It’s a good name, I like it. “How can you not like it? It personifies you,” Jacob thought. — Are you hungry? — Jacob decides to take the conversation in a slightly different direction, feeling how the communication is slowly reaching a dead end. — You know, no, I’m not hungry. I would like to take a walk, I don’t have enough air,” Jacob helps her get up and leave the block. Everything is new for Hilda. She listens carefully to Jacob, who tells her about everything that is here, without lies or pretense. He is a handsome man, but no matter how much she looked at him, she could not feel anything more than affection. — Tell me, did I have any other friends besides you? Or acquaintances? Well, I couldn’t be completely alone,” Hilda looks into his eyes, and Jacob shudders. He doesn’t know whether to lie to her and say that he is the only one, or tell the truth that she has Louise. But where is she? And will she want to see Hilda after what happened? “Yes, you have a friend,” Jacob said slowly, while he himself was wondering where her friend might be. — And who is she? “A complete bitch,” Jacob thought, but, smiling, he led her to the officers, where he last saw Louise. She, of course, sat surrounded by male attention. She was having fun and drinking, and it was clear from her that even the oppressive atmosphere of the camp had no effect on her. She smiled from ear to ear and laughed heartily. “What a creature,” Jacob managed to think. “Louise,” Jacob, going up to her, took her by the elbow so that she would come to her senses at least a little. — What’s happened? — the girl protested, but when she saw Hilda nearby, she understood everything. “You should talk to her,” Jacob loomed over her like an eagle. “Why on earth should I talk to her?” I don’t want to do this,” Louise tried to pull her hand away, but Jacob only squeezed her tighter and led her to her friend. — Jacob, I don’t want to talk to her. Why the hell did you bring her here all the way through the camp and why should I put up with this? — Because you are her friend. You’re already acting like a complete bitch and a prostitute, hanging around the officers who came here. — Sorry, but what does this have to do with it? — they approached, and Louise, seeing Hilda’s gentle eyes, understood why Jacob could not refuse her. “Hello,” Louise didn’t know how to deal with her ex-friend who had lost all her memories. — Hello. You’re beautiful, I think you’ll be happy,” Louise stood rooted to the spot, she didn’t know how to react. Hilda had never called her beautiful before; on the contrary, she joked with her friend that she would soon become fat. And she joked about her exes that someday they would return to her when they were already married and would take her as their mistress. “Thank you,” Louise forced a smile, said goodbye, hugged her, observing formalities, and quickly left. But the guy standing next to him decided that he would find out the whole truth or demand a sincere confession from Louise. Hilda is happy with her friend. She doesn’t remember anything, but she compares the silhouettes left in her head with real people and some of them match. She has a lot of questions about how she lived before she came here, did she love anyone or not? Jacob did not answer these questions and simply said that perhaps there were some of her things in the servants' room. And they will be there too. In the evening, when the all-clear sounded and everyone left, Louise was heading home. He will collect his last things, put them in a suitcase and leave here early tomorrow morning. He will never remember anything from his past life. She will be in the best company in Germany, just as she wanted. Walking along the road in high spirits, she didn’t even understand who grabbed her hand and dragged her into a small room. — What the heck?! — the girl wanted to start being indignant, but a stern male voice quickly silenced her. — Louise, tell me, could you kill someone? — Jacob pronounced the phrases in a clear, steely voice. My heart was beating wildly. — What kind of questions? Do you want to split me? Or ask if I could have pushed my friend down the stairs to kill her? “Perhaps,” Jacob made her sit down while he remained standing. — No, I couldn’t. If I wanted to kill her, I would have done it differently, there are many options… — For example? — Jacob looked at her with his eyes. — Poisons, firearms, even a gas chamber. You know, like in the movies? It’s nothing personal,” Louise pushed the man away from her and immediately hit her head. — You’re lying. Even though you’re a nurse, did you have any blood on your hands before the Hilda incident? — What if so? What do you know about me or Hilda? You came into our lives as an incomprehensible person, what are you trying to prove to me now? There is a smell of death everywhere here, and if I wanted to kill my friend, it would be easiest to do it here, where no one would notice her death, like the deaths of others. — You’re bluffing, Louise, admit it! — Jacob raised his voice, trying to get through to the girl. — No, it’s not a bluff, go to hell! You don’t know anything and you won’t tell anything to Hilda or anyone else. And even if you tell, they won’t believe you. I’m leaving tomorrow, so Jacob, do whatever you want! — Louise came out of the closet and finally took a breath of air. “Don’t worry, someday you’ll have to put a bullet in your head,” he finally shouted to her, but the girl was already running away to pack her things to leave here as soon as possible. Everything here was alien to her, everything weighed on her. She was running from the bitter truth. Louise knew that she would pay the bills, but like regular electricity bills, she decided to put this bill on the back burner.