The feeling of freedom, the taste of tyrium and the smell of intoxicating love.

      It wasn’t that long ago, but I can’t remember everything. I only remember fragments of my thrills. New and frightening. ***       I remember your hands gently touching the hot skin under my shirt. They groped my body powerfully. I melted and dissolved under your touch. It was like falling into a deep abyss. Eyes. Dark. Like the ocean, dark blue, bottomless. You looked at me then in a way that raised my body temperature. It was scary. Shaking in my hands, sparks in my eyes.       Chilly. It was getting dark. I remember how you hugged me with one arm, sitting on the thick grass. So dark, illuminated by the rays of the setting sun. The scent of roses that grew in this garden. This garden. In it we met for the first time. I thought you were just another dummy idiot. But soon you justified yourself. You weren’t like the others.       The cool evening wind was blowing, taking away the tree petals falling on the grass that leaned over us as if to ward us off. Even if there had been no detour. At this time fatigue “clung” to my sleeve like a burdock. It was like it was taking all the strength I had left in me.       At that time fatigue “clung” to my sleeve like a burdock. It was like it was taking all the strength I had left in me.       A shiver ran through my fingertips again as he slowly undid the buttons of my shirt, covering my lips with his. They were awfully 'sweet' and then I thought the taste was familiar. Tyrium. His ingratiating flavor. An unforgettable taste that would probably be remembered forever.       Without interrupting the kiss, I felt you slowly put your hands behind my back, teasing and touching the heated skin with cold palms. Under your light and unhurried movements, I melted like a marshmallow over a crackling fire. An indescribable feeling. The “heart” beat faster, dispersing the blue blood through the body.       With you, time seems to have stopped. There were no problems, there were no broken hopes. It was only with you that I felt so good. You were the only one I felt safe with. It became so all the same, I don’t care about anything and everything. Breaking away from my lips and scorching with hot breath, you said:       — Don’t be afraid, I’m careful, — your quiet whisper is like butter melted in a frying pan. Searing to a tender frenzy. The contrast of the temperature of the hands and the hot whisper again sent a current through my limbs, settling deep behind the walls of the “heart”, tapping out a frenzied rhythm.       I am entangled in a tangle of blue threads. I lost track of time, I forgot myself in your company. Your every word was as intoxicating as any strong cognac. I could no longer recognize normal words in that voice, just unintelligible babble. No matter. Absolutely.       I didn’t understand, I didn’t see, I didn’t hear, but I felt fine. I felt your playful palms. They easily undid and took off my belt. This is wrong. It just flared up like a match in the veil of a clouded mind. Grabbing you by the shoulders, I barely opened my eyes. You reassured me, told me everything was fine. Drove me crazy.       I felt soft lips and a familiar taste again. Soothing. In a short time he became a local resident. He rolled his eyes, loosening his grip. I trusted you.       Nuzzling your neck and inhaling the air heated by it, you continued, slowly removing unnecessary things. I lay on the grass, arms outstretched, and watched the sun silently and mercilessly sinking rapidly below the horizon. Plunging everything into darkness. My vision was sharpened, I could easily see the unobtrusive blue glow above your head, but even that was not enough to see what was happening around me. Only after a short time, the moon lit up the space a little. Tired. Your fingers easily coped with the remnants of clothing. I didn’t have time to notice how my jeans disappeared. So open. There was no strength for embarrassment. You won’t hurt me. I’m sure of it.       Thoughts, necessary and unnecessary, overlapped with each other in a foggy head. For a minute, it even seemed that this was another glitch in the subcortex of the program, that this was not true and just nonsense, but a projection of a deviant android. But this is a reality that the sense of morality did not want to accept.       Placing his palm on his knee, the skin slipped off her. A slight chill ran through your body when you touched the inside of your thigh with your fingertips, stroking. I shrank, feeling how your whitish fingers wrapped around the penis, rubbing the pre-ejaculate on the head with my thumb; I made several forward movements. Stares intently and watches my reaction.       She was worth it, her eyes randomly ran around the neighborhood, just not to look at you. Shameful. He clutched at his shoulders, his forearms to distract himself. Apparently, it even provoked you. I loved watching how hard I was trying to hide my overwhelming feelings from you. There were a lot of them, from mild disgust to a barely perceptible rolling orgasm.       Leaning forward, he briefly licked the head. I muttered long-suffering, running my fingers through your thick brown hair, waiting for you to continue. What did you just grin at and still whisper:       — Honey, you’re gonna cum without your hands.       I rolled my eyes languidly, just hearing your velvety voice. Was it worth repeating that at his mention, the program was curtailed and went far and for a long time. I heard the sound of a unzips. Just closed my eyes, enjoying. If it was winter in the garden, the wind would tear your cheeks to shreds. But it only blew faintly, stirring the leaves on the trees. It became difficult to breathe, you almost choked me. The roof clapped its hands from mercilessly embracing feelings.       I came to myself after a slight push. You pressed my shoulders to the ground, carefully, as if you were afraid to do harm. Finally, a groan mixed with heavy breathing sobered me up. Whose moan it was. Probably mine. It’s not that important. Despite your futile attempts to calm me down, it was still scary. New bubbling emotions in my head. It shouldn’t be like this. But all the obsessive thoughts burned away like burnt fluff. I tried to relax only because of the understanding that you are in me — you feel good. The rest doesn’t bother me to the core.       Biting my lips, I tried to drown out the sounds coming from me. A little time passed, I was muttering softly to the beat of your movements. The taste of blood appeared on the tongue. He was driving me crazy right now. But soon I gave up trying to shut up. I don’t remember why. You probably asked me not to do that. Yes. That’s right. He asked me not to do it in order to hear me. My real voice.       The pain was replaced by something alien, unfamiliar. I’ve never experienced this before. Most likely, pleasure. It drowned out absolutely everything that prevented them from enjoying it to the fullest. It was heating up on its own. It lived separately from the whole body. After him, the sensations of reality were different. Every touch felt like a slight vibration in his chest.       Groaning and clutching your shoulders, I tried to connect two words, I wanted to say something. Although this idea was never crowned with success. You beat rhythmically into me, enjoying my futile attempts to speak: I choked on tears and interjections. Among his mumbling, I could only make out a couple of words: “I love you.” They flew out by themselves, I didn’t even understand how it happened.       You saw perfectly well what was happening to me, you liked it. Watch this. There was a deafening silence in the garden, except for constant sobbing, moaning, which eventually turned into a scream, and periodic skin-to-skin slaps.       I wanted to look at you. What do you like now. It became harder for me to open my eyes, as if weights were suspended from my eyelids. Blush. Inanimate. Wrong color. More like blue. The same color as your eyes. We immediately made short eye contact. And then I saw your real smile for the first time. I will definitely remember her for a long time.       Lips. They were pale, but now they have acquired more colors. I felt the tart taste of thirium when you kissed me. Obviously, you’ve bitten them in the blood, too. I plunged back into the depths of my subconscious, thinking.       A ringing sound. Bringing to consciousness. This is also imprinted in the memory. A slap in the face. For what? Tenacious fingers grabbed his chin, forcing him to look only at you. I had double vision, I couldn’t concentrate. It hurts. His eyes were wet, a tear rolled down his cheek. What was happening to me? I felt something…       I felt something contrary to common sense. A spectrum, a kaleidoscope of emotions overwhelmed me, a full palette. Wrapping his arms around my waist, he pulled me closer to him. The liquid inside was scalding. You dragged on another sweet kiss. At the best moment when he did, he loosened his grip, releasing me. A bright wave washed over me. And then. Emptiness. The system was overloaded.       I came to myself dressed and lying on your lap: my hands were smoothing my disheveled hair. The body finally began to obey, but there was no strength left at all, even after the overload.       The wind lifted crumpled petals from the ground, taking them out of sight.       The moon slowly illuminated two silhouettes on the dark grass. One of them was practically falling asleep, sobbing and yawning from time to time. A small mist descended to the ground, sheltering them in its embrace. ***       Like pieces of a puzzle, a picture was forming in my head. It was hard for me to remember what happened next. But I remember clearly: your smile, whipping blows, muffled moans. As well as the feeling of freedom, the taste of Thirium and the smell of intoxicating love.