A Dragon Never Regrets

“Baelor...” “M-Maekar...doar naejot...” “Your Grace? N-No!! Fuck! NO!” “Oh, fucking Gods...” “Baelor? ...Baelor!” His eyes snap open. Dart around the room. See only blurred greys and blacks. Like a cloud over his vision. His head feels so heavy. Heavier than his limbs. He tries to move his hands, but ironically, is able to move his head easier. Neck, slowly creaking and deeply aching. For a few moments, Baelor simply lies there (wherever he is) and takes stock of all his aches and pains. His head throbs, almost unbearably. His toes and fingers feel like static, though, it feels more from lack of use than actual pain. He feels warm all over. Slightly dizzy, also, when his vision slowly begins to clear. The room is quiet. After glancing around, he realises he has been placed in the guest room that Lord Ashford so graciously offered to Maekar. “Maekar...” Baelor coughs out her name, his throat so damn dry. His eyes widen slowly as the last memories of his come slowly flooding back to him. He feels dizzier then, the dizziness giving him enough motivation to summon the energy to lift his arms. To turn himself slowly and awkwardly onto his left side as he tries to stop the world from spinning around him. He feels his eyes dancing in their sockets. Hears his heartbeat rushing through his ears like a gushing river. Baelor takes slow and deep breaths, and after some minutes, the dizziness finally begins to ebb away some. Not completely, but enough for him to feel like he can stand on his feet. (Or try, at least.) He must find his sister at once. Baelor slowly sits up. Just as slowly edges the blankets down his legs. Is thankful to see he is dressed in ankle-long robes—one less task to accomplish. He pauses when another wave of dizziness descends. Takes more deep and slow breaths. Nods to himself in confidence. Then, slowly and carefully turns and slides his legs over the edge of the bed. He clears his throat with a wince. Takes a deep breath. Grips the edge of the bed with both hands. Then, slowly pushes himself up, bracing his knees as he goes. Once he is up, he sways for a second or two. He uses the bed against the backs of his legs to keep himself steady. Nods to himself again after a few more seconds. Takes another deep breath. Then, takes a step forward. He doesn’t fall. Doesn’t even wobble now. He smiles, small but triumphant. He takes another step. And another. And then, another. His smile grows a little more and more with each step. And then, a chuckle puffs passed his lips when he looks up to see he has already made it to the door. Baelor takes a moment. Looks down at himself to make sure he is, at the very least, half presentable in his current state. He simply nods again, because this will simply have to do. The room is dark, and the tiny pothole of a window tells him it’s night, which means less chance of people being awake to see him in such disarray. But then, he is taking a moment to gingerly reach up to the back of his head. From what he can tell, Yormwell has done a fine job on the stitching. He no doubt feels the ghastly ridges of the wound. But he also, remembers the way it felt after his son’s helm was removed... He shudders. Pulls his hand quickly away. Frowns. He must find his sister at once. Baelor reaches for the door and finally steps out.

10 Minutes Later.

Maekar blows out a tired sigh as she makes her way down the corridor. Yawns loudly as she approaches her guest door. Rubs her eyes and cracks her shoulders to get ready for another night of sleeping in a chair at her brother’s bedside. Reaches for the handle and walks inside, shutting the door behind her. And then, the moment her eyes land on the empty bed, Maekar swears she almost has a fucking heart attack! Her eyes widen instantly. “B—“ Her eyes dart around the room wildly. “Baelor?” Her tone is cautious, despite the panic raging inside of her entire being. “B—“ Maekar slowly makes her way over to the bed to take a closer look. Sees no signs of struggle. Only some neatly rolled back sheets. (Just like Baelor neatly folds everything, because he has so be so Gods damn fucking perfect at everything.) “What...the fuck?” Maekar mumbles to herself, eyes still half wide as she glances slowly around the room. Her heart begins to race less in panic and more in excitement. But...there’s no way...is there? It is too soon, even for someone as strong as her brother. Surely, he cannot already have awakened. A slow but sure smile of pure happiness spreads across Maekar’s lips then. She is so fucking happy, that she could— A knock startles her from her thoughts. The noise rapid; almost desperate. Maekar blinks herself back to reality. Turns on her heel and marches over to open the door. Her smile falls when she sees Aerion standing there instead of Baelor. “What is it now, Aerion?” She snips as she brushes passed him. (Gods, she is an awful person.) Aerion follows her back down the corridor. Is half out of breath as he tells her with half wide eyes, “Uncle Baelor has collapsed.” Maekar halts immediately. Turns and grabs a fistful of her son’s tunic at the chest. Hauls him in close to her. Glares at him. Hisses out her words, “Where the fuck is he? No games right now, or I will fucking end you, Aerion.” Aerion’s eyes are wide, though, his expression lies somewhere between fear and resentment. He holds up both hands in surrender. With bitter sarcasm, he snips back with, “What do you think I am doing here right now?” Maekar huffs, but shoots him an apologetic look—because there is no fucking way she would ever stroke his ego by saying she is sorry out loud. She nods, lets him go and turns to continue down the corridor with renewed speed. “I came to tell you he has collapsed in the stables.” Aerion quickly tells her as he follows just two paces behind. Maekar scoffs. Throws a glare over her shoulder at him. Says, “So, you left him alone. Of course you did.” Aerion grits his teeth. “It is never good enough, is it?” Maekar ignores the stab of guilt that goes straight through her heart. At this point, she fucking deserves to feel just as miserable as she makes Aerion feel...because he makes her feel fucking miserable. (It’s all just a vicious fucking circle...)

4 Minutes Later.

Maekar doesn’t hear Aerion disappear. One moment, he is walking with her, and the next moment, when she reaches the closest exit to the castle, she glances over her shoulder again; hearing lack of footsteps behind her, and sees that he has slipped away. She does not stop to think about it much more than knowing he is a coward and simply no fucking help at all (as usual.) The Ashford family grounds aren’t too big, so, it takes Maekar mere minutes to reach their stables. And she finally lets herself breath a sigh of relief upon seeing her brother upright with eyes open. “Mother!” Egg grins brightly up at her from where he sits with on a bale of hay beside his uncle. “He is awake!” He exclaims excitedly. Maekar’s heart skips beats at the smile her brother gives her son, and then, at the way his eyes soften when they finally meet hers. In his excitement, Egg tears himself away from his uncle to run and hug his mother. Maekar rubs a hand over his prickly shorn head. Her smile is meant for her son, but she simply cannot take her eyes off of her brother. “Maekar,” His voice is barely above a whisper, but all the same, Maekar lets go of a quiet gasp of a breath—a noise of relief, like she didn’t quite believe he was real until he spoke. “Shall I fetch Maester Yormwell?” Egg asks his mother, staring up at her, his arms still tightly wrapped around her middle. “Yes.” Maekar says at the same time Baelor says, “No.” Maekar scowls at her brother as she tells her son, “Yes, Aegon.” Egg lets go of his mother, but pauses when his uncle huffs out a chuckle and says, “Dear Egg, will you leave us? I will be fine, I assure you.” He grins when Egg glances warily back at his mother, leans forward and whispers, like he’s sharing a secret with only Egg, “I shall have a tough enough time convincing your mother I am well enough, let us not bring over-the-top Yormwell into things.” Maekar’s eyes narrow slightly: small offence having been taken from his words when all she wishes is to take care of her brother. Egg smiles. Already feels guilty. But this is the perfect time, he thinks. He walks over to his uncle, hugs him before turning around and walking over to his mother to hug her one more time. Hopefully not the last time, he thinks sadly, but excitedly. Maekar gives him a soft squeeze. Smiles to herself when she hears him chuckle; feels him press the sound into her; the belly she once carried him within. Baelor is so caught up in watching his sister smile—because she rarely ever does so, and because he very almost never got to see it ever again—that he almost misses the rather sad smile on his nephew’s lips. He watches Egg stare at them both before making his way out of the stables. Baelor glances curiously after him until he hears footsteps approaching. He smiles gleefully up at her, just so happy to see her again—in his soul, it feels like he has been separated from her for years. Maekar stares down at him with a stern scowl as she asks him, “Can you walk?” Baelor nods. He is slow and steady, but he stands. Shoots her a small but triumphant grin. Maekar narrows her eyes up at him. Ignores her stupid heart skipping more beats—because she simply missed how tall he is; how he towers over her. Instead, scowls again and asks, “What in the actual fuck are you doing wondering around when you should be abed still—healing?” Baelor simply smiles before wrapping his arms around her shoulders and hugging her close. Even though they hug often, Maekar freezes for a moment before hugging him rather awkwardly back. The guilt is already rising so fast it’s making her feel sick... She pats him on the back, then, just dumbly stands there with her hands at her sides as she tells him, “Aerion tells me you collapsed.” Baelor chuckles lightly as he finally lets her go. Tells her, “Aerion is known for being dramatic.” Maekar eyes him carefully. Arches a challenging brow and asks, “So, you did not collapse?” Baelor shakes his head. Offers a soft but reassuring smile as he tells her, “I merely buckled at the left knee. And for just a split moment.” When her own face softens with clear concern and alarm, Baelor quickly but calmly adds, “It is nothing, Maekar, I promise you.” Maekar clears her throat before quietly asking, “What are you doing in the stables?” Baelor smiles at her again. Glances over at her silver mare stood beside his own black mare (sister horses), looks back at his own sister and tells her, “You visit Vhagar whenever you want to be left alone.” Maekar simply nods. Doesn’t know what else to do. Because she suddenly feels like a stranger in her own body. With the guilt just building and building inside of her as she continues to look at her brother, she doesn’t know how to fucking act in front of him. (And it fucking guts her.) And of course he knows her better than anyone still, because his smile slowly disappears, and now, he’s looking at her like she’s the one who deserves to be worried about. And now, Maekar is trying not to have a panic attack over thinking about how she could have fucked his head up so bad that he might not have even fucking remembered her at all, let alone still know her better than anyone. “Maekar—“ His eyes soften and she can’t take it anymore. Drops her gaze from his. Turns her back on him, if only just to give herself a moment to breathe. Then, after that moment, she clears her throat and says, “I should help you back to your bed before you actually do collapse.” Baelor frowns. Says, firm, but not commanding, “You should look at me.” He sighs quietly when she doesn’t budge and instead, says, “Because I have missed looking at you.” He didn’t think it would work, but he is so glad that it did—Maekar slowly turns back around to face him. She looks wary, then, confused after a moment. “You have only been out for 11 days.” She tells him after another moment—and tries to pretend the fact that those 11 days have not felt like the worst kind of torturous eternity. Though, she does feel a tiny bit better when he chuckles breathily and tells her, “It feels far longer.” Maekar bites on the end of her tongue to keep from asking if he remembers anything. She doesn’t know if she could handle much else right now, which she knows is completely selfish of her. But she doesn’t see herself being of much use if she is...well, useless. While she is lost in thought for a few moments, Baelor takes those moments to really look at her. And all he sees is how so very tired those once vibrant but still bright violet eyes of hers now are. That is his fault, he knows. Maekar startles slightly when she feels his hand take her own. Baelor smiles. Laces his fingers with hers. Gives her hand a soft squeeze and says, “I feel hungry. Have you eaten already?”