Twice Two

‘What time did you get home?’ Such a familiar intonation. Such an indifferent voice. A question whose answer doesn’t really matter. As if she were actually interested. No. She doesn’t even try to seem interested. She simply expresses her dissatisfaction. Once again. Plane and her sisters’ performance dragged on last night, and moreover it was extremely successful, which they decided to celebrate. Gossip, discussions, curious questions began — especially about Plane. Her friends had long wondered what connected her with Nymphia, who often appeared on her Instagram. Plane did not want to break her word to Nymphia, but it was unbearably hard to hide the happiness she brought her. Out of her closest circle only Big Atlas knew about their relationship, but even she knew only in general terms, and that wasn’t enough for Plane. She didn’t know why Nymphia hid so much and when she was going to stop. If at all. The sisters decided to take the matter seriously and started filling their glasses with alcohol more and more often. Plane, too tired to notice what her friends were up to, dutifully drank everything down. They got their way — once she relaxed, Plane told them why she had been away from the city for so long and how she didn’t want that trip to end. Despite being heavily drunk, she didn’t go into detail and avoided sharing the most intimate moments, especially those that happened at the filming. She would never have shared those under any circumstances. In the end everyone was satisfied — the sisters satisfied their curiosity, and a huge boulder of secrets fell from Plane’s shoulders. ‘I hope she forgives me,’ thought Plane, as she returned home in a taxi beside the quiet Atlas. Atlas kept dozing off, dropping her head onto Plane’s shoulder, then waking up immediately, mumbling something under her breath. The car stopped, and Plane looked out the window at the gloomy house, seeming empty with its dark windows. Yelena had been asleep for a long time — Plane didn’t know what time it was, but judging by the amount they had drunk, they must have stayed in the club long after it closed. Plane put her hands on her friend’s shoulders and gave her a light shake. ‘Attie, I have to go,’ Atlas opened one eye. ‘Are you sure you don’t want to spend the night at my place?’ She shook her head firmly and rasped, ‘It’s fine. I’ll make it. My cat is waiting for me at home.’ Plane nodded, got out of the car, and staggered toward the house. Toby met her as usual and, despite his small size, nearly knocked her down. Plane mumbled something incoherent, and upon reaching her room, collapsed onto the bed without undressing. ‘Andy, who am I talking to right now?’ The indifference in her voice changed to rising anger. No one dares to ignore her questions. Even if the answer is not that important, what matters is that she is heard and answered immediately, feeling the pressure of her intonation. ‘Are you drunk or something?’ Yelena abruptly grabbed her son by the shoulder and turned him onto his back, forcing him awake. The bright light cut into Plane’s eyes, and she groaned. ‘Well, Mom?’ she asked painfully. ‘I’m asking you again: what time did you get home?’ The question is the same, but the intonation different. Now it is not a reproach — now she will get nothing, not in her son’s state. She was furious at the surprise. ‘I don’t know,’ Plane replied indignantly, shielding her eyes from the sunlight with her hands. ‘Of course,’ Yelena said mockingly. ‘In this state no one cares about time. By the way, I was expecting you yesterday.’ ‘Why?’ Plane asked sincerely, sitting up in bed and opening her red eyes. ‘Did something happen?’ ‘Nothing happened!’ Yelena exclaimed. ‘I was just waiting for you to return from your exciting job and devote some time to your mother, and instead you were out somewhere.’ ‘Mom, I’m an adult…’ Plane began, but Yelena interrupted her. ‘You live in my house.’ ‘Again…’ Plane moaned, clutching her head as she went to the kitchen. Yelena watched her go and frowned. Lately Andy had been breaking her rules too often — Yelena always dined alone; when he came home, he shut himself in his room; when she tried to talk to him, he avoided her questions and got annoyed; and too often she saw Plane online. Despite promising her son and herself not to oppose his career choice, this irritated her more and more — she considered Plane’s behavior inappropriate and did not want to see her son constantly absent from her life. Plane drained a glass of water in one gulp and sat down noisily. Each time it grew harder for her to be in this house. Next to her. She had promised not to enter her son’s room without permission, and she always kept her word. Until now. She lectured him like a little child misbehaving to spite his mother. She tried to control him, though she had promised not to. And again talk began about his line of work. The final straw was the evening when Plane returned from a short performance trip to neighboring cities. She came back exhausted, and all she wanted was to sit in her room and see or hear no one. Nymphia had a performance that day too, so she wasn’t up for talking either. But Plane’s plans didn’t come true — entering the house, her eyes fell on her parents, who were having a pleasant conversation in the living room. Her father’s arrival was unexpected — he never came without warning. Besides, it happened extremely rarely, and it required a special occasion. Something had happened, and that ‘something’ promised nothing good. ‘Hello, Andy,’ her father slowly got up and approached his son. He always spoke English with everyone, hoping that this way he would seem more authoritative among those around him, especially since he was trying to build a career in Miami. This always irritated Yelena immensely, who stubbornly refused to accept English at home. This time she contained her displeasure, pretending not to notice. ‘Hello,’ Andy’s voice replied. Plane shook the hand offered to her and continued staring at her father in surprise. ‘Went somewhere?’ he asked, nodding at the suitcase next to Plane. ‘Yes,’ Plane replied calmly, and briefly explained, ‘Performances.’ Her father chuckled vaguely, and Yelena hurried them to the table. ‘But I just want…’ Plane began, but realizing her plans had gone down the drain, and seeing her mother’s focused face, she broke off and sat at the table. ‘What do you plan to do?’ her father asked during dinner, then added, ‘My son.’ ‘At the moment, I’d really like to rest from the road and not get out of bed until tomorrow morning,’ Plane replied sincerely. ‘And in the future?’ her father continued his interrogation. ‘How do you imagine your life?’ Plane had long realized where this was going, but she no longer had the strength to clarify or prove anything, so she continued to evade the question. ‘Everything will be much better in the future than it is now, although even now it is wonderful,’ Plane said, not without humor, ‘Why are you here? Did something happen?’ Her father frowned — the son wasn’t taking his questions seriously. That won’t do. ‘Your mother is very worried about you,’ he said slowly. ‘She says you’ve been disappearing somewhere, started being rude… And now the drinking.’ Yelena looked at Plane reproachfully, one hand on top of the other. So she couldn’t handle it alone. She decided to get over herself and drag her father into it, who mostly didn’t care. And he decided to play the caring parent. ‘Well?’ Plane looked at him defiantly. ‘Do you think that’s normal?’ her father continued lecturing. ‘Yes,’ Plane said simply. ‘I have a job I can stay late at. I have friends I can spend time with. And I have feelings I cannot hold back.’ ‘You do remember that our family always had rules, don’t you?’ ‘There were rules,’ Plane repeated, ‘and there was a family too. And now I am an adult who can make my own decisions. Or are you dissatisfied with my job again?’ ‘I don’t understand — how can this be called a job?’ her father could no longer contain his emotions. ‘Do you think it’s normal for a young guy to dress in women’s clothes, paint his face, glue strange things on himself and hang around men at night?’ ‘Yes,’ Plane shrugged. ‘And what’s wrong with that? Who promised me that if I graduated from university, I wouldn’t be pressured because of my job?’ ‘Not me,’ her father said sharply. So that’s it — Yelena had arranged everything. She already regretted her promise, but she couldn’t admit it to her son. How convenient — to use someone who could do everything for you. ‘Why do you even care?’ Plane was getting angry. ‘You come here once every few years, I never get calls from you. You stopped caring about me a long time ago. If you’re so afraid your people will see what your son does, don’t worry. They will never know that Plane has anything to do with you. You’re the last person I’d want to tell the world about.’ After finishing her fiery speech, Plane got up, grabbed her suitcase and headed to her room. ‘You can’t talk to me like that!’ she heard behind her. What could he do now? Catch up and start teaching sense with his fists? It hadn’t happened before, but who knows what could come into his head this time? Maybe he could try — Andy was no longer the same intimidated boy he had raised. Plane rushed into the room, grabbed her phone, and threw herself onto the bed. Nymphia’s performance was in full swing. Even if Plane wanted to interrupt, it wouldn’t work — Nymphia wouldn’t pick up the phone until she finished. ‘Call me right away when you’re home,’ Plane wrote, burying her face in her hands and letting out a loud sigh.

  ✶ ✭ ✶ ✭ ✶

Nymphia looked with compassion at Plane’s depressed face. Too often she appeared before her like this lately, which greatly upset Nymphia. She suggested that if Plane came to her again, it might ease her suffering, but this time Plane had too many shows to cancel. Looking at her today, Nymphia couldn’t imagine how Plane would continue performing, especially since she would soon have to travel to the UK, and then go with all the girls from the show to the Critics’ Choice Awards ceremony. ‘Plane,’ Nymphia broke the heavy silence. ‘Why don’t you come to me anyway? You know I always wait for you.’ Usually after such a question Plane would shake her head and list reasons why she should stay home. But today she was silent, not looking up. Nymphia waited patiently for her reaction. Finally, Plane spoke, ‘I guess I won’t refuse this time.’ Nymphia sighed with relief and smiled. ‘Well, that’s great.’ ‘I just don’t know how long I’ll stay. It’s hard for me to say right now,’ Plane scratched her head. ‘You can stay with me as long as you want. We can try living together,’ Nymphia added carefully. ‘All right,’ she said suddenly, ‘but I need time to stuff my suitcases with junk.’ Nymphia, unable to believe her ears, didn’t know what to say. Plane, meanwhile, continued, ‘But I’ll try to pack quickly and catch the next train. Wait for me, baby.’ Without waiting for an answer, Plane hung up and stared at the two suitcases that always accompanied her on trips. She had many things to pack for her performances, and luckily she already had everything ready, but with the move things got more complicated. She didn’t know how long she would be leaving home. Maybe she would be let go and come back the next day, or, on the contrary, living together would turn out to be perfect for them. But was Plane ready to leave her hometown and move to New York for good? Plane’s thoughts were interrupted by a sharp sound outside the door. Plane pulled the handle, and Toby burst into the room, looking pleased. Seeing the abundance of things on the floor and furniture, he began to jump happily on the clothes and tried to grab a red wig with his teeth, but Plane managed to save the incredibly expensive new item in time, which she had been able to afford thanks to winning one of the contests. Plane grabbed the dog and held him tight. Toby immediately forgot about the potential victim of his games and began licking Plane’s face. She leaned away from the puppy’s affection with a practiced gesture and patted Toby on the head. ‘How can I live without you?’ Plane asked sadly. Toby was always genuinely happy when she returned from long trips, showing his love in every possible way, and Plane devoted a lot of time to him at home and on walks. Now everything was different. What if she never saw him again? She couldn’t take him with her either — Yelena was Toby’s rightful owner, and even if Plane did take him, who would it be better for? He couldn’t live in a tiny apartment, and with mistresses constantly on the move. Pushing away her sad thoughts and letting Toby go, Plane continued to pack her things into the suitcase while her pet barked cheerfully, carelessly getting underfoot. After making sure everything for the performances was packed and nothing forgotten, she filled the second suitcase with her usual clothes, not really caring what exactly she put in. In any case, she could buy everything she needed if she forgot something. Plane was looking around at the remaining items on the shelves when a sudden thought struck her. She opened a drawer in the closet and reached for a small box discreetly placed in the corner. Plane took out her dear earring and looked at it lovingly. Well, she almost forgot something she definitely couldn’t buy. Even though Nymphia could have given her dozens of her own earrings, this one meant the most. For a moment, Plane recalled the day when she looked at herself in the mirror and noticed she had forgotten to take it off, and then touched Nymphia’s earlobe with her fingers and unexpectedly told her about her fascinating dreams. Her parents were still sitting in the living room, their faces tense as if they were considering something, when Plane dragged the heavy suitcases from the second floor. Hearing the crash, her parents turned their heads simultaneously. Both had the same expression of bewilderment. After a brief glance at them, Plane continued toward the exit, dragging her luggage. Yelena immediately jumped out of her chair and walked over to her. ‘Where are you going?’ she asked in surprise, grabbing Plane by the elbow. ‘Away from here,’ she said through clenched teeth, trying to shake off her mother’s firm grip. ‘No way,’ Yelena raised her voice. ‘I won’t let you go anywhere until you explain.’ At this time, Plane’s father sauntered out of the living room and caught up with Yelena. ‘Don’t you dare talk to your mother like that,’ he said, glaring into Plane’s eyes. ‘Fine. I’ll explain,’ Plane said angrily, freeing herself from the grasp. ‘I’m not going to stay in a house where people constantly try to control me and blame me for everything. I’m going somewhere I’ll be welcome. Unlike this place,’ she added scornfully. ‘And what is this magical place that turned out to be better than your own home?’ her father asked sarcastically. ‘It may be hard for you to imagine,’ Plane said defiantly, ‘but there are people who love and accept me completely. And it will be much better and more pleasant to live with her.’ ‘With her?’ her father repeated, puzzled. ‘I think I know who you mean,’ Yelena nodded. ‘So you still have something to do with that boy who was given the win?’ Plane’s father continued to be puzzled. ‘It doesn’t matter right now,’ Plane crossed her arms. ‘I’m going to stay with Nymphia, and I advise you to stay out of our lives. It’s none of your business. And besides, you don’t want your friends to know the details of your son’s life, do you?’ she said sarcastically to her father. The parents were silent. Plane gave them one last colorless look, then, with a wistful glance at Toby wagging his tail carelessly, left the house. ‘Fine. He’ll be back in less than a month,’ Yelena said coolly. ‘You think so?’ her ex-husband asked with a hint of doubt, not taking his eyes off the door. ‘He won’t be able to get along with anyone,’ Yelena said in the same tone. ‘He belongs here.’ ‘Can I go home now?’ the guest asked with a sense of accomplishment. Yelena looked at him indifferently and headed to the kitchen, saying as she went, ‘It’s a pity that nothing has changed since you came. You probably regret making such a journey for nothing.’ ‘Oh, no,’ the man chuckled. ‘Some interesting facts about my son came to light today. Why don’t you tell me who this Nymphia is and what some boy has to do with it?’ Yelena grinned and made a gesture of invitation toward the living room, preparing to enlighten her ex-husband.