Responsibility

ㅤ Jude paced back and forth in the spacious corridors of Kanbalar's castle. He had requested an audience with Gaius, but hadn't prepared a speech on the sensitive topic. "I have to pull myself together," he breathed heavily with excitement, muttering under his breath. "I have to take responsibility," he repeated over and over, psyching himself up. "I have to apologize... But what will I say?!" He clutched his head. 'Forgive me, Your Majesty, for allowing an unworthy person to touch your worth?! I apologize for unceremoniously touching your… your big…' He couldn't even think of formulating the phrase without gasping for breath, blushing furiously. 'I'm sorry for comparing… it to the Teepo's zipper's tongue?!' "Why am I so ashamed?" he reproached himself for his stupidity. Even Ludger laughed at him when they talked about their last trip to the hot springs. That terrifying time had almost evaporated from his memory. How the towel on his buttocks had dissolved… And what did he care? Ludger spent most of that time unconscious. 'Why am I so worried? All I need to do is bow low and ask for forgiveness for my unacceptable rudeness.' Simply apologizing wasn't that simple... But otherwise, Jude wouldn't have been able to breathe a sigh of relief with the clear conscience that had been tormenting him ever since: he respected Gaius too much. 'Why did this happen to me…?' Jude continued to pace back and forth without looking until he collided with a mighty chest. It was a miracle he didn't knock out his brilliant brain, which turned out to be surprisingly useless in a stressful situation. "Sorr…!" he stammered as usual, but immediately fell silent upon seeing the one who stood before him in all his glory. "G-Gaius…?" "You were called to the throne room several times, but you did not answer. I had to go out myself." The king's gloomy (usual) appearance made Jude nervous. He involuntarily took a step back. "I-I’m sorry," he said hesitantly, swallowing the lump that had formed in his throat. His heart sank with fear at the sight of the king. Jude felt so small. He couldn't move or speak, like a small animal before a hypnotizing predator. His breath caught in his throat. "So what do you want?" Gaius asked evenly, not breaking eye contact. "I want to take responsibility," Jude replied obediently, mesmerized, surprising Gaius with his answer. Gaius thought hard: he hadn't expected this. And now he didn't know what to do. He also didn't know what exactly Jude had meant. He had already paid for his victory and his words by creating spyrite and giving hope to a new world. Was there something else Gaius didn't know? There was no need to guess for long. Jude finally decided to speak out: "I… then… so rudely… at the hot springs…" The mention of the hot springs vividly jogged his memory. It took enormous willpower to suppress the flush that rushed to his cheeks. With so many really important things to do, he managed to forget this something that was worth his honor. And recalling it again would only be an insult to his dignity. And Jude continued to raggedly voice his thought, which failed to coalesce into something clear and coherent. "My apologies…" he finally exhaled, ending his futile attempts to speak clearly. Gaius stared at Jude for a moment, unsure of what to say or how to react. Finally, he spoke quietly, evenly, and with no emotion: "Just forget about it." "O-okay," Jude swallowed. "I agree." And so they parted without saying goodbye. Jude's mind, having taken the words of a powerful and domineering figure as an order, no longer returned to the matter. But Gaius's memories came alive… The desire to be distracted from state affairs and to "chill out" incognito at least once more was discouraged for the rest of his life. Not that he had intended to… ㅤ