The Mystery of the Blackbird

Everyone is already gathering on the terrace. I am running. But I'm afraid of being late; I hate being late. I'm afraid no one will believe it's me. I don't remember what city this is, what the place we're meeting is called. It's already dark outside; I keep stumbling. My toes are bleeding. I run, my dress slips, and I am terrified. My heart is flying out of my chest. Laughter drifts from the roof; I hear a hum and conversations. I'm so afraid she'll come, that I'll be thrown out, that he won't forgive me. My hair has long since fallen out of its updo, my breathing is ragged, my whole body is tensing up, I want to fall to the ground. I finally reach the building where the party is. I can't run anymore. I climb the stairs, breathing heavily. I adjust my sandals and the white hem of my dress. I emerge onto the roof. "We've been waiting for you, Ami!" says a woman with a familiar face. It's dark on the roof, a deep blue reigns here. My heart isn't beating; it's trembling. I'm cold and suffocating, I'm so scared. And then I see her, the impostor. She is pushing me out of this world.       A strand of hair falls into my eyes. I push it back and walk towards her. Towards her, as she embraces my husband. Her white hair seems gray in this blue gloom. She bites her lips, holds my husband, one hand on his thigh, the other holding a wine glass. She turns sharply and sees me. "Ami, come join us!" she calls to me, quite amiably. He is also looking at me, but as if seeing me for the first time. My legs buckle; I want to run away and cry in a closet. My lips tremble; I scratch the hem of my dress with my nails. I approach and join the circle of their friends. I was so afraid of this moment. The moment when my beloved would become a stranger to me.