Labelled by Blood

      Jesse looked excited, Parker was radiating. I took a seat on a large rock with the journal and organized a really pretty and practical notes system where I could mark up strengths, weaknesses, and general notes for each of the boys. I wanted them to have something to really chew over and be able to build on. I'd be frustrated if the notes were disorganized or not good. Of course "good" is subjective, but I knew what I found to be good. It was this.       "Lex, count us down?" Parker asked me.       "On go?" I asked back.       "Is there another way?" Jesse laughed.       Really Jesse? In rock, paper, scissors? Apparently there was, for you. I decided to blow him a raspberry and he blew one back. Parker looked like he was about to join in but answered with a chortle and called us "childish."       "Right. Ready?" I asked. They nodded. "3. 2. 1. Go!"       They both summoned their vestiges. Jesse instantly became a hummingbird. Explosion after explosion propelled him in a, seemingly, random set of directions. Fireworks that sent mud, leaves, and twigs everywhere. Parker flourished his mace and stood perfectly still after. His eyes perfectly tracked Jesse. At first I was in awe. Then it came to me. Jesse was predictable. He really was. I just didn't consciously know until now. My hand moved without my brain bothering to process.       Jesse shot forward at Parker, who ran and slid under Jesse. With a quick motion, he was up and sprinting at Jesse. There was a pause in Jesse's movement like he was surprised Parker dodged. Parker didn't commit, though, and sidestepped at the same moment Jesse sprung to life with a backwards shoulder tackle. Parker held out an arm and hitched a ride on Jesse. That was round one. I hadn't realized, but I had scribbled a ton of notes. They were disorganized and floating between the elegant columns I had set up. I grimaced. I set up a new page as the boys reset.       "Parks, you got better," Jesse said, shaking his head.       "I don't think I did," Parker said, in a clear 'trying-not-to-hurt-your-feelings' kind of way.       Jesse opened his mouth but then closed it and readied up. I counted them off for a second time. The match started off the exact same way as before, except this time Parker was using his strim to set up small rings of fire along the arena. They flickered with an unnatural gracefulness that I didn't know if natural fire did. They burned a lovely yellow and orange and looked almost cartoonish.       They made Jesse have to change how he moved and Parker smiled. Not the kind of smile when you feel like you're about to win a game of chess, but the kind you give when you were proud in someone. Parker walked up to his fire and walked through a small gap he left. Jesse propelled himself to where Parker started and stopped. His brows furrowed and his posture relaxed just a bit.       A cone of orange sparks flew out and Jesse threw himself to the ground, using his strim to be back on his feet in an instant. But he didn't charge like earlier. Parker was playing him. He knew Jesse just wanted to rush in and win the match. He was forcing Jesse to think and adapt. Something he didn't have to do often. Not with football. Not with me. My pencil lead broke. I pushed some more out.       There was a silent and terse standoff. Parker extinguished his flames and then did something new. He wound his mace back and threw it up through the air. It had a steep angle and would never reach Jesse. But Jesse couldn't tell. Parker charge Jesse and Jesse blasted off to the side. Parker threw a punch that Jesse had no problem blocking, then Parker swung an empty hand out like his mace was still there. In an instant, his mace burned up in a dazzling flame and was in his hand, stopping inches from Jesse's confused face. Jesse scrunched his face and then went wide-eyed.       "Ggs," Parker said, offering a fist bump.       Jesse took a minute to really accept his defeat, but bumped Parker back. "Ggs."       I had a ton of notes. Jesse was predictable. Fixed. Too reliant on his strim. But he was also fast to react, still had crazy speed and movement, and was, of course, just a powerhouse.       Parker was a lot less predictable. And he didn't use his strim as a lifeline, but more of like a tool. His biggest weakness is actually his unpredictability. He tried something totally wacky. If Jesse had been able to judge the angle of the mace, he would've been able to ignore it entirely and just rush Parker head on. Parker depended too much on knowing his opponent's habits. This got me thinking. What if his opponent didn't have obvious ones?       The boys rushed up to me for my notes. I took a minute to rewrite the first page's notes and went over each point one-by-one. Jesse hated to hear his flaws, but he was very respectful about it all. Parker agreed that he really was hoping Jesse would react the way he thought he would. I warned them both that the Collector both knew how Jesse and I operated while also being totally unknowable to us. He was the exact thing Jesse and Parker would do awful against. An unpredictable opponent who knew how you moved.       I handed the journal and pencil off to Jesse. My feet sunk in the mud as I stood and made my way to the middle of the arena. Parker had dispelled his vestige. The sun was warm, but not enough to keep the cold winds from hurting my face. I kept my raincoat on because I knew I'd freeze without it. Jesse started the countdown. I hunched over, my hand hovering over my stapler. If it was high noon, we'd look like cowboys in a shoot-off. My fingers clawed. They were itching to be ready. To have control. I had to win this.       "1. Go!" Jesse shouted, a whoop so excited you'd think he was cheering on his favorite team.       My hand activated like it was triggered by a code word and my rifle was in my arms in an instant. I took a step back to gain distance. The roar of fire erupted behind me. The floor turned from a muddy deep brown and green to glowing orange. Parker ran at me, his mace held close to his body in both hands. He glitched. Between Parker and someone else. The sky was a gray void. The floor a gray concrete. Jesus came right for me. I was trapped.       My body froze. My heart froze. Everything went numb and my chest hurt. I felt like I was in a strait jacket again. Like Jesus was going to loop his sickle around my neck. His eyes were determined. Obsessed. Not with me. With the idea of there being no more me.       But then he reached me. His hands were empty and grabbed me by the shoulders. Jesus glitched. Parker was there, pulling me into a hug. My eyes never blinked. My breathing was shallow and came fast. My chest eased some.       "Lex, hey! Lex, it's okay. You're fine. You're safe." Parker's words were a waterfall.       Jesse was up to his, caressing my back. My heart slowed down. Right. I was alright. I was okay. Alex, get your head in the game. You can't go around breaking every time something happens to you.       "Alex?" Jesse asked.       "Right." That was all I could say. Even if I wanted to say more.       "Let's break," Jesse stated.       Parker and Jesse helped me sit on the rock. My face was flush. Or maybe I went pale. But I was looking more myself with each ticking second. They stood by me for the next ten minutes. My ears were hot and my cheeks definitely flustered now. I was being a baby. I had to suck it up and move on. I'd dealt with worse back in my hometown. Slurs, being a punching bag. Having absolutely no one. My eyes felt a small pressure build up behind them. A weird souring prickling jolted through my nose.       "I'm sorry," I muttered.       Both Jesse and Parker swore it was okay. But how is having a pathetic loser on your team okay?       "I'm sorry," I muttered again.       It didn't change their reactions. Then it hit me. I was still just wallowing. I needed to actually get up fight past this. I had to. If I couldn't now, when I was actually safe, we were doomed when the Collector decided to attack.       "Lex," Parker started.       "Alex," Jesse joined.       "No. I am sorry. Let's try again. I'm ready." I stood up and pushed back them. I got into the same spot as before.       Parker eyed me and then looked to Jesse. Jesse gave him an approving nod, his eyes never leaving me. Parker walked to his starting spot and I hunched over, ready once again.       "Don't change your strategy because of what just happened," I warned. "If I want to get better, I want you at your best."       Parker nodded. "Alright."       Jesse counted us off. "2. 1. Go."