Love in Disguise

Once on the road, she barely said a word at first. My heart hammered in my chest uncontrollably at the thought of what was to come. Finally, she broke the silence. “Louise.” I turned and looked at her. “Huh?” “My middle name is Louise. You never asked me that when you got out of jail or tried to guess again at what it could be.” We were silent for a moment. “Kya Louise is a very pretty name,” I finally said, attempting to lighten things up. “Why do you betray me like this?” she said. “Why don’t you want to be with me?” “You know why, Kya. I wanted to be with you very much until you started getting physical with me. I told you this before.” “Oh,” she simply said. “There are others out there who may not mind your ways so much. Why don’t you seek them out instead of concentrating so much on someone who doesn’t want to be with you?” “Because I don’t want to seek them out, and I think you do want to be with me.” I started to object before a realization suddenly hit me. The more I appeared to want to get away from her, the more distrusting she’d be of me. I knew then that I had to let her believe I wanted to remain in the relationship as much as she did in order to obtain her trust—for only with her trust would she leave me alone long enough to get away. So I would let her believe I was much obliged to be her slave during the daytime and her whore at night. “Yes, Kya, it’s true,” I said, trying to keep the discomfort and dishonesty out of my voice. “I do want to be with you.” “Then let’s cut this bullshit and get on with our lives together.” “Okay,” I said, trying to muster up a convincing smile. As soon as we pulled up and exited the car, Yogi came running up to us. First, he greeted Kya, then concentrated his attention on me. “Hi, Yogi!” I exclaimed with mock enthusiasm. “I missed you, buddy.” “Yeah, think of that,” said Kya. “You not only hurt me by taking off like you did, you hurt him, too. He felt very deprived and abandoned. I could tell by his behavior.” “I’m sorry, Yogi,” I said as I patted his head playfully, a slight wave of guilt tugging at my heart. “I won’t desert you again.” “I’ll see to it that she keeps her word,” Kya told the dog as we all entered the house. My heart began thumping wildly. I stood still in the middle of the den, unsure of what to do or expect. I looked at Kya. She looked as terrifying as she did gorgeous. I could see she was still quite furious with me. She walked into the kitchen and took a cold soda from the refrigerator, then turned to me. “Go put your stuff away and get changed.” Without a word, I walked past her and headed toward the bedroom. She followed close behind and watched as I put the few things I had where they had been before. Then I slipped on a short-sleeved nightshirt, minus the panties, which I knew she’d prefer. When I finished, I realized I was thirsty. I headed back toward the kitchen just in time to see her lock Yogi outside. So much for counting on his protection against his ruthless master. “I’m really thirsty, Kya. Do you have anything cold I could drink?” She looked at me incredulously. “What do you think? Do you think I have anything cold for you to drink, Sativa?” I was afraid to utter a sound. “My kitchen’s your kitchen. You want something to eat or drink, get it.” I walked past Kya and into the kitchen, where I got my own soda. Then we stood there staring at each other for what seemed like a century. She leaned in the kitchen doorway as I sipped on a vanilla soda. “I knew I was bringing you home today, so I made sure there was plenty of your favorite soda.” “Thank you. That was nice of you.” “Was it?” I nodded, my heart still doing double-time. “I missed you, and I missed being here at home.” “Is that so?” she asked with skepticism. “Sure,” I said, hoping to sound convincing. “As long as we can get along, why wouldn’t I be glad to be home and in your arms?” Placing my drink down on the counter, I boldly walked over to her, surprised she hadn’t beaten the snot out of me yet. I wrapped my arms around her neck, pulled her toward me, and kissed her on the lips. Her eyes still held doubt and anger, which did nothing to help settle my heartbeat to a more civilized number of beats per minute. She continued to stare deep into my eyes. It sent chills up and down my spine. I felt like she could read every thought in my head. “Well, why don’t you come and show me then?” she finally said, motioning me toward the bedroom. I do not want to do this, I thought to myself. But what choice did I have? I walked ahead of her, turning to pause and look up at her pleadingly, but she simply stopped as soon as I did and stared down at me with merciless eyes—eyes that were hungry to please only herself. “Move on,” she instructed. “Please be gentle with me,” I begged as I turned to face her in the center of the bedroom. Without a word, she slipped my nightshirt off over my head before I even had much of a chance to realize what she was doing. As I stood before her naked, she slowly began to undo the buttons of her shirt. She did this very slowly, all the while staring intently into my eyes. She had a mixture of expressions on her face—angry, sad, and excited all at the same time. This mixture of emotions scared me all the more. Trying to keep the tremor out of my voice, I said, “Don’t you think we’re rushing things?” “Why? It’s not like we just met.” She shrugged her shirt off and began to remove her pants. “No, but we haven’t been getting along and I just thought we’d—” She shoved me onto the bed. “Kya, please!” Her lips smothered mine, mashing my lips hard against my teeth till I thought I could taste blood once again. She placed her body on top of mine, pushing my back firmly into the bed. “No!” I managed to spit out once she pulled back for a second. I gasped for air. She again smothered my lips with hers, then let up to shift to a more comfortable position. I gulped in a huge breath of air. “Please listen to me,” I choked out. “Shut up!” she screamed, slapping my face. “All I’ve done is listen to you. You’re going to do some listening of your own now, understand, you ungrateful bitch?” I nodded. “I’ve given you everything! I’ve given you love, a nice home, and what do I get in return? A girl who runs off at the first sign of disagreement.” “I’m sorry, Kya, I—” “Yeah, I’m sure you are. You’re always sorry, aren’t you?” I was frozen stiff, palms outright in defense, afraid to utter another word. Nothing I’d said so far had helped anyway. “Well, let me tell you,” she said, bringing her face just inches from mine, “if you want to learn the true definition of the word sorry, you just take off on me one more time, you got it?” I nodded, trembling with fear as I struggled to breathe beneath her and calm my rapid heartbeat. Suddenly, she was silent as she stared down at me while leaning on her arms. Her face was now in the shadows, disabling me from reading the many emotions that seemed to flicker across her face. Then, as if she now felt tremendously guilty for the way she’d been treating me, she gently placed a palm on my chest between my breasts and began to make light, circular rubbing motions. “Calm down, sweet little lady, calm down.” I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. “That’s it. Just relax. No one’s going to hurt you.” Her low, soft voice and gentle caresses had a surprisingly hypnotizing effect on me. At first, I was hesitant about allowing her to have any positive effect on me physically, especially sexually, but why not? I told myself. It was better than the heart-pounding fear I’d felt earlier, with my nerves causing me to shake like an epileptic. I needed all the relaxation and good feeling I could get, for I had quite a task ahead of me—one in which I knew would be harder to succeed the more uptight I was. So I allowed her to calm and soothe my frazzled nerves. I even allowed myself to stroke her smooth, silky hair. I then ran my hands up and down her strong, taut arms and over to her small, firm breasts. I twirled a finger around each nipple. I inhaled her feminine, flowery scent. Pretend it’s just like old times, I told myself, before she crossed the line. Things are good. She’s not violent. She really does love you. Just keep telling yourself that for now. And this is just what I did. It was the only way to survive until I could break free of this madness. I closed my eyes. This time, I was kissed with gentle passion. Her tongue slid down my chin, down my neck, and came to swirl around my left nipple. After a moment or two, it slipped across to find my right nipple, which eagerly awaited her attention. Our breathing grew heavier. My fingers lightly trailed the long length of her back. Her tongue kept sliding down further. By the time it reached my navel, I was burning with wet heat. There was nothing like intimacy with another woman, and this woman, in particular, was like no other I’d ever experienced. How it saddened me all the more to know she was such a monster! Just enjoy the moment if you can, and get out while you’re still alive, I told myself. It’s only a matter of time before she loses it on you again. You have nothing but lust going for you here, and you know you need much, much more than that. Yes, I agreed with myself, for I’d gladly trade lust altogether for true, honest-to-God love. Her tongue reached my trimmed patch of pubic hair. Reflexively, I spread my legs. Once her tongue hit my clit, my body was screaming for release. I writhed with delight as she rotated between soft, teasing strokes and quick, hard jabs. She sucked and licked until I came in thunderous waves. Still dizzy as the last waves of desire throbbed throughout my body, she pulled me upright. “Touch me!” she demanded urgently. I got on my knees and pressed my body against hers as she knelt before me. We caressed each other firmly. My breasts tingled with delight as my nipples brushed against hers. She fell to her back as I fell face down upon her, sliding myself up and down her body in a teasing manner. I then placed my clit against hers and rode back and forth with quick, rapid movements until she, too, found the release she so desperately longed for.