Love in Disguise

Monday, April 7 Marilyn left Sunday afternoon, and finally, Monday had arrived. I awoke with a start to the sound of Kya’s voice as she spoke to the hall monitor and to Palma before the door shut behind her and we were alone together. My heartbeat quickened as I lay on my tummy looking towards the corner which she then came around. “Hi sweetie,” she said as she placed a duffel bag on the table. “Hi, I missed you.” “I missed you, too,” she said as she turned toward me and sat down on the bare DO bed to be made up later that evening by Espi. “If you need to go back to sleep, though, don’t let me keep you up.” “That’s alright. I’m already up and I doubt I could fall back asleep. I’ll get up and take my shower after you bring me to get a change of clothes, if you don’t mind.” “No, I don’t mind. After all, it’s what I’m here for,” she said with a smile. After I showered and changed, we talked much more than on the previous days she had worked. When she saw that I was listening to music with only one earbud, I explained to her about my ear and the surgery I’d had as a child in Boston to build the outer ear, then, as an adult, the surgery I underwent to have the frame dismantled, which had become quite sensitive. “Do you sign?” she asked me. “Yes, quite well, and I know a lot of Spanish, too,” I said, signing to her as I spoke. I taught her some signs throughout the day. She agreed that my sentence was unfair. “It’s an Arizona thing,” she explained to me. “Things are tough in the wild, wild west, particularly when it comes to the laws. Look at the bright side of it, though. We may never have met otherwise.” I gazed into her eyes and smiled. “For you then, it’s all worth it.” “Awe, how sweet.” There was a knock at the door. At first, I was worried that it was a new inmate. I wanted to savor every possible moment alone with Kya before we’d have to return to watching what we said to one another. Kya rose from her seat at the table and went to answer the door. “Yeah?” “It’s your time outside,” the hall monitor told her. “Oh, okay,” said Kya. “Want to go sit outside?” “Sure,” I said, rising from my chair to follow her out the door, down the hall, and outside. Each room was let out one at a time since the area in which we’d sit was so small. Once seated outside, she asked, “So how come you never talk about your family?” “Not much to say, I guess.” “You don’t want to tell me about it?” “I’ll tell you, but you’re not going to like it.” “No?” “Well, it’s pretty simple, actually. Most of my family, particularly my mother and sister, are very downgrading and domineering.” “Are they?” I nodded. “And one day I just got tired of the control and the hypocrisy.” “So how long has it been since you’ve seen or talked to them?” “A few years now.” “And you don’t miss them or have any regrets?” I shook my head. “I figured that if I could have enough self-respect not to let anyone not related to me treat me bad, then I should also have enough self-respect not to let anyone I share blood with treat me bad either.” Kya’s expression was thoughtful, then a slight, tight, closed-lipped smile of understanding crossed her face. “Guess you gotta do what you gotta do.” “What about you? I mean, you never talk about yourself much, though I suppose that’s part of the rules here, isn’t it?” “Kind of. I guess it depends.” “On what?” She shrugged. “What was your childhood like?” “My childhood was wonderful. I’ve been blessed with great parents.” “Good for you,” I said sincerely. “And my younger sister Jenny, who’s now a year older than you, was like any other younger sister. She could be a brat, but we also had our share of good times as we got older.” “How long have you been in Arizona?” I asked. “About eight years. And you?” “Four. Andy came out before I did, then my parents and I actually saw eye to eye for once and agreed that I had no life back east, so they flew me out here. Why’d you decide to come here?” “For the change. Arizona is different than Alabama and California, even though there’s certainly nothing wrong with either of those states. I also had a friend out here as well. Her name’s Kelly. She and her little wife Brianne have been here for a decade now.” “It’s nice that you knew someone here before you moved here,” I said. We gazed off into the distance, watching those of general population for a few minutes. “Leanne,” I said, turning to face her. “Huh?” “Leanne. That’s your middle name.” She shook her head. “Wrong.” “Linda?” “Wrong again,” she said with a laugh. “Keep guessing.” “Lisa?” She shook her head. “Oh, I give up for now. Besides, it’s not like you’d say so if I were right.” She chuckled. “So how’s your other job going?” I asked her. “It’s going.” “What do you do when you’re not working?” “Oh, this and that, though not too much. I’m more of a homebody type, so I don’t usually go out much when I’m not working,” she said. “I’ve never been much of a social butterfly myself. I’m not really a people person.” We took a few moments to just sit in silence and enjoy the fresh outdoor air. “They make you wear those long sleeves year-round?” I asked. “Uh, no. Actually, we have T-shirts and shorts we can wear as it warms up, but I figured I’d just go with this for the rest of the time I’m here, which isn’t going to be long, and it’s pretty chilly inside with the way they keep the air conditioning system cranked up real good.” I noticed and admired the muscle definition visible in her arms even through her shirt. She had more muscle than usual, but not enough to detract from her femininity. “Does your family live in California, or are they still in Alabama?” “They’re in California. What about yours?” “Last I knew, they were pretty much all over the place—Massachusetts, Connecticut, Florida.” “Sativa, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?” I glanced at her. “No, not at all.” “Why aren’t you with someone? I mean, it just seems like someone as sweet and as pleasant to be around would have quite a few offers.” I smiled. “Oh, I get offers. It’s just me, I guess. I’m so picky. I don’t know, maybe my standards are too high, but I have to be attracted to the person both inside and out, and it seems I usually get only one or the other. Either that or it’s a little too one-sided. It’s no fun to want someone with a barely existent appetite or to have someone smothering you all the time. I prefer somewhat of a happy medium. On the other hand, if the woman were that gorgeous, maybe I wouldn’t mind being smothered all that much.” She smiled with what seemed to be admiration. “What about you?” “I think I’d have to agree with you. The person doesn’t have to be a carbon copy of myself, but mutuality would be nice. Either way, I like a unique individual who’s different than myself for the most part. Balances things out better that way,” she said with a smile. “That’s another thing that keeps me alone a lot. People want you to be just like them while I just want to be myself, you know?” She nodded.