Big commotion in a small jjimjilbang

- Jasmine tea, stop the alarms, '

Coffee — out, give us yoga, '

Steam in the sauna — I’m a queen, '

Mission to the bath, I’m not iron!

Meir was driving the car, rhythmically beating her fingers against the wheel. Rumi, wrapped up in hoodie, was singing along, rocking to the beat. And in the back seat, Zoey was hastily recording new rhyming combinations. - This verse is no worse than the one we recorded last week — said Zoe. - Don’t remind me of the studio, Rumi chuckled, opening her eyes wide open. We almost burned a column there when we ran the last track. - But we’re back at the top of the charts, Zoe said. Peace turned from a busy highway to the quiet road that went into the mountains - The album is up, the demons are gone, and it’s time for us to go. Yau! — sang Rumi - Yes, I am, ' said Zoey with a quick nod from her notebook. 'Not in that room where the steam smells like kimchi. - Then let’s go to the eucalyptus. - One evening. One. Without demons. — Rumi took a deep breath and stretched. - At least until tomorrow… The car rolled smoothly down a winding road. The evening light fades, the windows are more and more lit with pine trees and rare signs — it is fifteen minutes before the chimillion. - By the way, Zoe, how are you doing with your rights? she asked Rumi looking in the mirror. Zoe shook a little, not lifting her eye from the notebook. - Well, I… she started. - Today was her tenth attempt — intervened Peace without taking his eyes off the road.- Anniversary. - Thank you, Mira, ' said Zoe, kneeling down. - Wait… the tenth? — Romi raised her eyebrows. — You said that “I’ll pass on the next one”. - And I spoke sincerely, said Zoey. But fate must have decided that my place was in the passenger seat. Forever. - She tried to park, added Mira. First she hit the cone. Then the instructor. - I didn’t “hit”. I “touched”! Bumper, — cut Zoey. Rumi laughed. -Okay, don’t worry. Not everybody’s supposed to drive. - That’s right. Let the one who passed first time do it — Zoe went for Mira. - I don’t remember you thanking me when I pulled us out of that underground parking lot with the infernal slime. - Because I was busy fighting Rumi for the same giant slug. Mira chuckled, changing the gear. - Well, you’re on vacation today. No one’s going to judge your driving. Just your ability not to melt in an 80-degree sauna. - That’s what I’m dealing with at “excellent”. — Zoey stubbornly closed the notebook and started to rhyming: -Drop the cargo and black latex, Only slippers are status. Rumi caught: - No curses for you — Just steam and cream in the candy. The world again stuck on the wheel: - The body melts, the mind — in peace, With us — a bath, that’s cool! Baaaaa-NAYA! The pointer — “Chimcillian Pond” — hung slightly crooked, illuminated by a single lantern. The road has long been left behind, behind it — the noise of Seoul, camera flashes, hunting for journalists and fan streaks. Here everything was different: mountains, numerous trees and silence, Advertisement on the site assured: “Ideal place for those who want to disappear — at least for the night. Without internet. Without eyes of others. Only you and warm water”. - Even the GPS didn’t bring it here right away, ' said Meera, shutting down the engine. — Perfect, ' said Zoey, looking at the facade. A small building in traditional style, with wooden planks, lanterns at the entrance and a quiet pond on the side in which a lazy couple of thick gold carps floated. They got out of the car. In their hands — huge bags: chips, sweet rice, drinks, colorful packets with candy. Between them — three containers of sushi, two with pizza. - Are you sure that this is a weekend, not a gastronomic expedition? — asked Mira, lifting the box with the inscription “cheese edge — plus pineapple”. This is preparation, said Rumi. We are in a battle break. Zoe intercepted a pack of sushi, holding with one hand also a bamboo basket with cookies. - I hope there was no “diet silence” on the menu of this sauna. - Let’s go, said Rumi briefly, nodding in the direction of the entrance. The doors of “Quiet Pond” opened automatically, releasing warm, moist air with notes of menthol and eucalyptus. For a second, no one spoke. Then Mira chuckled: -It’s either paradise or a hoax. - I’ll take both, if there’s a big tub in there, ' said Zoe. Inside the chimcilbani was warm and cozy: wooden panels, soft light under the ceiling, quiet music. Behind the stand stood an old man, with a neat gray beard and a look that was almost fatherly affectionate. - Good evening, he said with his hands folded in front of him. — Welcome to the “Quiet Pond”. You are just in time — before the night shift we have almost nobody. - Perfect, Meera nodded, putting the bags on the counter. — We have a reservation for three, under the name “Yoon”. — Of course, of course, — the old man enthusiastically nodded. — Everything is ready. We have already prepared for you a separate dressing room and private recreation room. No one will bother you, Sister Yoon. - Thank you very much, ' said Rumi, stretching. - Only, please — added the old man, presenting key-card — no photos. We have here a zone of complete privacy. Even the staff observe silence. - Oh, yeah, ' said Zoey grinning. 'One shot — and there’s half of Seoul. From the depths of the hall, a young woman in uniform came out to them, bowed politely and beckoned to pass behind her. The girls picked up the bags and went after her, laughing and talking. The door behind them closed smoothly and silently. There is silence at the reception. The old man remained alone, spread his shoulders and grew in height. The old skin darkened, shriveled, and then like glass, opening under it a smooth, young but demonic face. The eyes flashed with amber light, on the cheekbones there were demonic patterns. Because of the curtain came out two more evil ones of lower rank. - Tell the others to get ready. The low-ranking demons nodded in silence with content and hastened to disappear into the shadows, disappearing into the passages leading to the technical rooms. One of them hit the towel hanger with his shoulder — it swung, but did not fall. Everything was again in seeming order. The demon at the receiver — now tall, young in appearance, with a face written by patterns — was left alone. He looked back, breathed slowly, spread his shoulders and glanced at the watch. - I still have fifteen minutes, ' he muttered to himself. 'We can finish the series… He leaned under the stand, pulled out an old smartphone with a cracked screen and put on headphones. - Come on… come on… — The demon went through his fangs. — Why are you so slow when you need him?! The door to the women’s locker room was slammed, food bags were neatly folded on the table, and clothes — scattered in all directions. With bundles of hair and swimsuits, the hunters looked like ordinary young girls tired after a long week, not as saviors of all humanity. -The last one in the pool is that goat! shouted Rumi and jumped forward. - Don’t even think about it! said Mira, but Rumi had already jumped into the water first. With a deaf burst she disappeared under the surface, behind her — Zoe, and then, having already realized that she was a “goat”, she jumped and Mira. The water was hot, enveloping. A light steam hung over the pool, crumbling in soft curls. The lighting from under the water flickered green and blue. Mira leaned back, her hands on the edges. - How… great… — she moaned. — I’m ready to stay here forever. - If we were gone for three days, then… what would happen? Zoe scowled out and threw her wet hair back. Rumi lay on her back, closed her eyes and slowly circled. - Silence. No pentagram, no squeals from the portals of hell. Just water and me. Somewhere above them, in the stonework of the ceiling, there was a quiet crack. Barely noticeable. The girls did not hear. -Don’t say anything. Neither about the graphics, nor about the producer. Nor about the fact that we have a photo shoot in two days. - You already said it, Zoe remarked. -That’s it. I’m in “stealth mode”, replied Rumi and went under water with a bulking. - And I thought we were going to eat chips, ' Zoe conspired, shaking the bag like bait. It was tempting to shake them over the water. A second later, she patted Rumi — emerged with the precision of a great white shark, grabbed the bag as if it had a seal in it, and disappeared again underwater with the triumphant racket of the packing. — That’s quite a different matter, said Mira, opening the orange soda can. An aluminum tap, one sip — and she breathed out noisily. — I’m officially happy. Zoe sat on the edge, gnawing cookies and looking at the ceiling with an expression close to enlightenment. - Yummy, hot bath… — Rumi got up, chewing cheesy chips. — Nothing can spoil this evening. Cotton — not in the water, but in the wall. After it there is a crack of breaking wood. The walls around the bath were inflated and in the next instant they were thrown to the sides. The splinters flew into the air — and out of the gaping hole came claws, teeth, mouth and eyes. Not one demon. Not two. Dozen. Fifty. Even more! -Oh, yeah, ' said Rumi, looking down at the fangs. — Demon attack. I couldn’t have forgotten. The first demon ran forward, but Mira was already standing on her feet — wet hair stuck to her back, eyes blinking with anger. She already had a plastic bowl in her hand. With a crack she hit the nearest demon in the jaw, the second got his only eye. The third jumped with a burp, but he got it too. The bowl broke and cracked over his face. - No weapon now, ' she muttered, and shoved the rest of her hand down the fourth’s throat. Rumi flew out of the water with splashes — the same trajectory as for the chips, but now with an outstretched leg. A blow — and one of the demons flew across the edge of the pool, smashed into the wall under the eyes of others. - There’s nothing more dangerous than a woman who is prevented from resting, she said, turning to the next one. Zoey remained on the edge. She looked serene. Almost. In one hand, a cookie basket. In the other, she struck the demon in the temple with the back of her palm. He fell down. Zoey calmly took the cookie and ate it. -One, she counted aloud. The demon jumped on her from behind. Without looking, Zoey patted him under the ribs with her elbow. He collapsed and got a heel on his nose. - Two. - Can you put some candy on the table? cried Mira, waving her towel around with a whip. - Don’t interfere with the process, said Zoey calmly and punched in the nose of the one who was creeping to the side. — Three. The steam gradually settled, and in the bubbles of evaporation began to draw silhouettes. Hunters stood back to back — wet, scratched, but focused. The demons closed the ring around them again. Those who had already received theirs were now more careful and angry. They hissed, scraped their claws on the tiles. And suddenly there was another sound — not a growl, not a scrape. But soft, sloppy steps. In slippers. Rumi first turned her head toward the corridor. A tall silhouette slowly emerged from the pair. A young man. Almost. Almost — because there was something in it that said: a demon. The human form was deceitful. Skin too smooth, facial features too fine, movements too confident. And, of course, the eyes are golden, with vertical pupils and symbols on the skin. - The so-called hunters, he said in a steady, calm voice. At last we met. Mira and Zoya looked at each other in sync. - Why are they always with the press? whispered Zoey. - It’s a mandatory condition of the contract with hell, I guess — replied Mira. — And the face is nothing like that. The horns would be better. - Our master will reward us generously when we bring you to him — continued the demon, clenching and glistening fangs. - It was already, ' said Mira, carelessly wrapping a towel around her fist. 'Usually after that we kick your ass. - You haven’t met people like me yet — said the demon with his hands stretched out, as if he was going to start an opera. — Because I… But here from the pocket of his pants played music — a melody from some teenage series with Netflix. Following the voice of the narrator: - In previous episodes… The demon froze. Rolled his eyes. - Oh, I can’t believe it… he muttered, reached for his phone, poked on the screen, paused. Took a look around the room. - The moment is lost? The junior demons were boiling. One was even compassionate. The main demon sighed heavily. - Okay… Let’s go to round two? - Always welcome, replied the choir to Rumi, Mira and Zoe. - Take them, the demon threw. The steam all around thickened, as if the air became heavy and stood still. For a moment, the space held its breath — and flashed. From the hands of the girls came a light — not blinding, but deep, as if their souls were burning out. The energy enveloped each of them, ran through the body, ran on the fingers, and suddenly there was a splash. Rumi was the first to close her fingers, and in her hand, as if from the rhythm of heart and anger, a sword folded. She swung it in her hand and stood up on the bar, splashing drops of water on her shoulders. Mira was already spinning a massive branch of go-go dao over her head. Zoe unfurled the luminous daggers with a deadly fan. The demons did not stop. The first three jumped — claws forward, jaws open. They managed to do one step at a time. Rumi stepped forward and carried the sword up from below. The first demon flared with sparks, the body falling into the smoke, which disappeared in the same instant. The second one was hit in reverse and evaporated into the air as if it were not. The world moved forward with a furrow — her guang dao made a half-circle, and the two, jumping from different sides, disappeared in a squall of sparks and splash of water. The third did not react — he came with a breath in his chest, and he flew into the wall, piercing it through. Zoe did not walk — she was sliding, almost without sound. Daggers to the throat of one. Knee to the chest of the other, and to the back of the one who tried to creep up. Each blow was accompanied by smoke — the bodies were scattered without a trace. Not a minute had passed, and there remained only the chief demon still standing at the exit of the corridor. - It seems you should run, Meera moaned, writhing with a guang dao and a lazy blade pointing at the demon standing in the hole. — Are you sure? he answered calmly. He threw his hand forward — and it immediately sprang into the wide stream of water. The stream struck with such force that the hunters were thrown into the air like bowling pins. They hit the wall, smashed the towel shelf and collapsed into a pile on the tile. - Oh… — Zoey groaned, lying upside down. — It was… unexpected. -Who would have thought that a liquid guy could throw himself, smirked Mira, rising to her knee. - Beware! cried Rumi. The second stream of water came to them like a whip. The girls crumbled in different directions — Rumi flipped across the bench, Mira rolled under the stream, and Zoe literally whizzed behind the column, leaving behind her a trail of splashes and crumbs. The demon was slowly stepping forward, his feet no longer resembling legs at all — they were flowing streams, merging with the meadows on the floor… and absorbing them. - You’re bold. Fast. Brave. — He raised both hands — now they were both clean. — But now you are in my element. - Yeah, but without the Paphos, you’re literally a puddle, ' said Rumi, hiding behind the stone bulkhead. — Get out of here, you slurry! — Zoey added to the demon with a dozen daggers, but he managed to make holes in his body and all the shells flew past. - It’s my turn! — the demon clapped His shoulders shook, and out of them sprang long water tentacles. They swept the air, tearing steam, like whips — with whistles, crackling and rumbling. Tentacles beat on the floor, walls, air, not caring about accuracy — only destruction. - Get down! shouted Zoe, dodging the jet that knocked out the ceramic column behind her. But Rumi didn’t make it. One of the blows hit her in the side. She screeched, flew through the partition like a wet rocket, pierced a thin wall and with a deaf “boom” crashed into the storeroom. - Rumi, the echo of Mirah. In the storeroom there was a twilight, smelling of wet broom and old powder. Rumi breathed out, shook her head and stood up. Next to it — a broken cart, crumpled mats, and… — Oh… — her gaze fell upon a construction industrial vacuum. He was standing in the corner, lonely and dusty, but with a powerful hose and a creepy imposing inscription “TurboWos 9000 Pro+” on the side. Rumi stared at him. Then on the remote. Then again on the hose. Her lips slowly stretched into a crazy, inspired smile. - I think I have an idea. She grabbed the vacuum cleaner, pulled it to the crack, stuck the hose into the socket with a click, checked the wire, turned the switch on abruptly — and the assembly buzzed. - Hey, water! shouted Rumi, slipping back out. — Get to know the dry cleaning regime! - Cheg… — the demon didn’t even have time to talk, as the hose stuck in his back The vacuum started to moan like a jet turbine, and the demon’s body immediately began to twitch. From his shoulders the jets were rising up, the face was drawn out of horror, and the feet were running in place — but it was too late. uh-hey! Stop, stop! No need?! I don’t want to! he said as his torso was half gone in the hissing hose. He tried to grab the side of the bath, but Meera and Zoe cut them off in time - YOU HAVE NO RIGHT! I… I voooo — and the demon head with a bud disappeared in the vacuum cleaner. - He’s… all of it? — Zoe asked when Rumi turned off the vacuum cleaner. And then suddenly he jumped! - LET ME GO! YOU CAN’T HOLD ME LIKE THAT! — It’s obvious from the inside. — IT’S UNHYGIENIC! DEMONS HAVE RIGHTS! The vacuum cleaner jumped again. - I’M CLAUSTROPHOBIC! — And you try to clean up! — A few more times without much pity shook the vacuum cleaner with kicks. He shook, howled at the turbine and jumped up again like a crazy teapot on wheels. - I’ll break your heads! I’ll make you breathe with the stinky filter! cried the demon hysterically, his voice bubbling like a cork in a jammed pipe. -Get in the line! — Rumi, Zoe and Mira got angry. And they kicked the vacuum cleaner at the same time. He whizzed, jumped up, flew off the wall, bounced back, and started spinning in place -OOO-OOO-OOO! Stop it! Please! Rumi straightened up, came to him victoriously and put her foot on the body like a pirate on a treasure chest. The vacuum sprang. - Quiet there, she ran and breathed. — Whoops… You know, a soda? - Yes! shouted Meera and Zoey in sync. The vacuum cleaner, still writhing and quietly barking with threats, was thrown into the storeroom with a din and pressed on top of it by a box of toilet paper. The trio of hunters returned to the surviving pool — albeit with a crack, but with hot water — and sat down directly on the edge. Soda sizzled in cans. - It was a fine day off, said Rumi, shaking her head. - True, with a slight taste of chlorine — added Zoey, taking a sip. - And the main thing — without producers, — whispered Mira, covering her eyes. They froze in silence. Only bubbles, light steam… and distant: - I’m still here! And it’s dark for me! — said the pantry. - Can’t hear, can’t hear, ' said Rumi as she lifted the jar. And at that moment, somewhere deep in the building, there was a rattle of betrayal, and one of the remaining walls with the grace of an elephant turned into a pile of chips and dust. Trinity looked at the debris in silence. - That’s a perfect day off, Zoey scowled.