Make Her Smile Again

      The insomnia had finally made itself known. Jerking his eyes open, Levi didn’t immediately understand where he was. There were no familiar patient beds around, only the walls of a small room. He had long since grown unaccustomed to proper sleep, preferring to doze in a chair, and waking up like this had thrown him off balance. Where had he fallen asleep?       After gathering his wits a little, Levi realised he had gone to Mikasa’s room in the evening, and through simple logical deduction, he pieced together the moment when he had finally understood where he was and what he was doing there.       Mikasa was still sleeping on his arm, and extracting himself from this position was not easy. However, the captain had no intention of lying here any longer. A miracle only happens once, and he no longer held any hope of falling asleep again. The prospect of lying there until morning in such a position didn’t appeal to him at all. Besides, there was no telling how long Mikasa had gone without sleep, which meant the likelihood of her sleeping for a very long time was quite high.       Making sure Mikasa was sleeping soundly enough not to be disturbed by his movements, Levi carefully slid his arm out from under her and just as cautiously got out of bed, afraid of waking her. His neck was terribly stiff, and he had completely lost feeling in his arm. An unpleasant pins-and-needles sensation ran down his legs, but he refrained from moving too much and disturbing Mikasa. He didn’t want to disrupt her sleep. Let her forget all her worries, if only for a short while.       He genuinely felt sorry for her.       His eyes had adjusted to the dark, and now he could clearly see her small figure. Despite Mikasa being significantly taller than him, she now seemed very small and weak. It was awful to see what had become of his strongest soldier.       Thinking that he had been staring at her for too long, crossing the bounds of decency, Levi reached for his crutch, which was standing nearby and which he had miraculously not knocked over when getting out of bed. Trying to make as little noise as possible, he left her small room.

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      Levi made his way unhurriedly to the common ward and returned to his bed. Lying there doing nothing wasn’t the most interesting pastime, but there was nothing else to do. In his office, he could have re-read reports or prepared some other documents, but there was no such opportunity here. And were those reports even needed by anyone now? What would even become of the Scout Regiment? If Levi could know the answers to these questions, he wouldn’t be suffering so much, trying to understand what came next. There wasn’t so much as a book in the ward, not even a newspaper or a magazine to be found. He had to die of melancholy and boredom.       Of course, very little time had passed since the Rumbling, and they probably hadn’t started printing anything yet. Although, Levi thought, some newspaper scoundrels might have scribbled something by hand, despite all the hardships. During their last visit to Marley, the people selling newspapers were so annoying that it was easier to buy the useless paper than to try and refuse it. Yes, the information in those newspapers could have been useful to the people of Paradis, but after buying a couple of different publications, the Scouts quickly realised that no one was publishing anything serious, and the “sensational” events often turned out to be mere fabrications. But now, he would have read even a fabrication, just to distract himself from his grim thoughts about their far-from-rosy future.       “Captain, where have you been?” asked Jean, who had apparently heard Levi return.       His first thought was to make a snide remark in his usual style, like “none of your damn business,” but he restrained himself. And why should he lie? He hadn’t done anything wrong, and besides, Levi was still, in a sense, their commander, and they were still his subordinates. There was nothing strange about the captain checking on an injured soldier.       “I went to see Ackerman,” he replied indifferently enough that no notes of agitation could be discerned in his voice, which he certainly didn’t want to betray in front of his subordinates.       “How is she?”       Jean was genuinely worried about Mikasa’s condition. It irritated and even offended him that she wouldn’t let anyone close and refused to talk. But the fact that yesterday Mikasa had come down for dinner and had responded at all was already encouraging. He didn’t want to force her back to reality, but where she was sinking to frightened everyone: Jean, Connie, and Armin. Now he wanted to know how she was; He didn’t even think about how long the captain had actually spent with her, or perhaps he just didn’t realise, considering he had been sleeping peacefully in his assigned bed all that time.       “Better than she was.”       Levi didn’t feel like discussing her condition. Mikasa probably had her own reasons for not telling her friends what she was feeling, but he had absolutely nothing else to do, and a couple of vague remarks that essentially explained nothing would clearly harm no one.       Jean sensed that the captain wasn’t in the mood for conversation, as usual, and, turning onto his side, quickly fell asleep, leaving Levi with his thoughts.

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      In the morning, everyone headed to the common dining hall. This time, Levi decided to go with everyone, to see for himself that Mikasa was starting to come to her senses and was at least eating. Although, even if she didn’t come for breakfast, he wouldn’t hesitate any longer and would force Mikasa to eat in her room. Jean, Connie, and Armin were discussing something animatedly at the table, eagerly devouring the porridge that looked as if someone had already eaten it. The mixture looked unappealing every morning. Tasting it was no better. Like standard hospital food. As if it had no flavour, but that didn’t make it any more pleasant to eat. However, there was no choice. Levi was saved from this terrible porridge only by the fact that he was never particularly hungry, so a couple of spoonfuls for strength were enough for him. The others, though, seemed not to notice the nasty aftertaste of the food. All the better for them. Mikasa was still nowhere to be seen, but Levi continued to sit, pretending to be interested in the boys' conversation.       It didn’t escape their notice that the captain kept looking around, searching for someone. It was clear who Levi was trying to spot with his gaze, but the guys already knew it was pointless. Armin, deciding it was better not to fuel his hopes of seeing his subordinate, began:       “Captain, if you’re waiting for Mikasa, she…” Armin flinched as someone put a hand on his shoulder and immediately spoke in a very familiar voice:       “Then she’s already here.”       Mikasa, under the same surprised gazes as yesterday, sat down at the table, placed a plate of that horrible mush—which was still called porridge—in front of herself, and began to eat.       Everyone was silent and couldn’t believe their eyes. Mikasa’s face was quite calm and no longer expressed the apathy the guys had encountered when trying to talk to her. Only the captain barely reacted to this abrupt change in her mood, because he was the reason she was here now. At least, he wanted to think so. He wanted to be useful in this new and strange world.       After the very first spoonful of porridge, Mikasa’s enthusiasm waned. Even despite the acceptable temperature of her breakfast and the terrible hunger that had finally awoken inside her, she didn’t want to eat it at all and quickly pushed the plate aside. A barrage of questions immediately showered Mikasa. Her friends asked how she was feeling and expressed their joy that she had finally decided to join them. Utterly embarrassed by the commotion, she just waved her hands helplessly, trying to stop the noise. The captain, indifferently observing this scene, just made his familiar 'tch' sound, and that was enough to get everyone’s attention.       “Lower your voices, you’ll bring the whole hospital down on our heads,” Levi said with a displeased look. Mikasa involuntarily let out a quiet chuckle, immediately drawing the gazes of everyone at the table.       “What’s so funny, Ackerman?”       “Nothing special. I just remembered how we all used to sit together like this at one table and talk to each other. You told us to be quiet back then, too. It was…”       She couldn’t finish. Suddenly, tears streamed from her eyes again. Mikasa didn’t even have time to understand how it happened. It just suddenly felt unbearably awful, and she covered her face with her hands, trying not to reveal her state. But everything was clear anyway. The mood at the table turned grim. No one knew what to say or how to comfort her. Everyone thought about how bright that time had been when they were fighting titans, when they had hope that humanity could eradicate them all, and that the whole world would open up to them, and they would become truly free. How mistaken they had all been. And even now, when the titans were truly gone, it brought no relief. They were the only ones who had survived. These five sitting at the table, and a bunch of Marleyans and Eldians, including those who remained on the island. Could that be called a victory, let alone freedom?       Mikasa felt a hand descend on her shoulder. She looked up at the guys opposite her, but none of them had moved. It became clear that the gesture belonged to the captain.       “Ackerman, no need to create a scene here. Go and rest.”       Levi looked at her with his detached, cold gaze, and it invigorated her a little. The emotions had washed over her too unexpectedly even for herself, and now she was grateful that the captain had been able to cool her feelings a bit and bring her back to reality.       “Yes, sir. Sorry. I don’t know what came over me.” She rose from her seat, leaving the tasteless porridge on the table. “I think I really do need to rest a little.”       “I’ll walk you!” Armin immediately jumped up.       For the first time, Mikasa didn’t object and nodded in agreement. She had tried to distance herself from them, truly tried, with all her might. Even though it was painful and frightening, Mikasa still tried to tear herself out of their lives so she wouldn’t hold them back, so they could move forward, each on their own path, but she had failed. She cherished every one of those sitting with her at the table now and couldn’t even imagine life without them. Knowing that their paths would inevitably diverge was unbearably painful, but she had given up and decided it was better for them to part as good friends than to disappear from each other’s lives, leaving only bitter memories of pain and loss. When they both reached her room and Mikasa was already closing the door behind her, she suddenly stopped.       “Maybe you and the guys could come by later? I want to talk to everyone…”       Armin never ceased to be amazed by how sharply her mood changed. He didn’t recognise the ever-cold and collected Mikasa. Now she was either happy about something incomprehensible, or she fell into hysterics in an instant. Just yesterday, it was impossible to imagine her even greeting them with anything more than a nod, if she acknowledged them at all, and now she herself wanted everyone to gather in her room. It was so strange, considering how Mikasa had only been pushing them away lately. He was curious what had caused such a sharp change in her, but Armin decided not to ask.       “Of course. When?”       “I don’t know. Later.”       With those words, Mikasa, just as before, simply slammed the door in his face. Before, this would have angered Armin. Not now. There was no point in being angry at Mikasa for this after everything that had happened to her. She was surely still not herself. And he never really knew how to be truly angry. Since childhood, he was used to Mikasa, although she cherished him, not always thinking about his feelings. Armin decided not to make a big deal of it and returned to the others with the unexpected and pleasant news that Mikasa finally wanted to see them.       After breakfast came time for the patient examinations. The examinations lasted until lunch. The Rumbling had spared no one, doctors included. The severely wounded who still hadn’t regained consciousness, or those who needed urgent help, kept arriving at the hospital. Some patients were discharged, and others immediately took their places. The hospitals were overcrowded, and too few doctors remained to examine everyone with the necessary speed and attention.       The Scouts almost no longer needed medical help, but no one was going to kick them out of the hospital. After all, they were the heroes who had saved the remaining world from complete destruction and humanity from extermination. Everyone understood that the road back to Paradis was closed for them. Here, they were strangers, and they were given time to settle in.       The nurses quickly examined Jean, Connie, and Armin, as the most “promising.” Their injuries were not serious at all, and after their time in the hospital, they were already in full health. The guys decided to visit Mikasa, not forgetting to invite the captain along.       “Leave Mr. Ackerman for now,” interjected the doctor who had approached.       “I still need to conduct a thorough examination of your injuries,” he then addressed Levi.       He glanced at his hand, now missing two fingers, and didn’t resist. After all, titans were no longer a threat, so there was no need to play the hero and go without proper medical care. His comrades had died in hospitals more than once simply because they didn’t know about diseases and bacteria long known in Marley, and because bandages weren’t changed often enough. He didn’t want to share their fate. Moreover, despite the days that had passed, the pain hadn’t subsided, and if not for the doctors' medicines, he probably wouldn’t have been able to lie there so calmly. Of course, even the pills didn’t always help, but it was tolerable, and for that he was grateful.       “I’ll come later,” the captain said, and started talking with the doctor, showing that the trio were no longer his concern.       The guys quickly reached Mikasa’s room and entered without knocking, knowing she was expecting them.       Mikasa was indeed waiting for them. She was sitting on the edge of the bed, looking out the small window directly opposite the door. She didn’t notice her comrades enter.       “Mikasa,” Jean called her.       She flinched slightly upon hearing her name. Yes, she had been waiting for them, but had gotten lost in her thoughts again and drifted away from reality, and now she felt a little embarrassed that she hadn’t even noticed such a—albeit small—crowd entering her room.       “I was just thinking a little,” she smiled in response, and everyone immediately scattered around the room, occupying the small space available.       Armin sat on the bed, and Jean did the same. Connie had no choice but to lean against the wall. There was no more space in the room. Mikasa briefly looked everyone over and, not seeing one more figure, asked without hesitation:       “Where’s the captain?”       “The doctor is examining him. He said he’d come later,” Connie chimed in.       Mikasa tried to hide that she had wanted to see the captain right now, hoping no one would notice her suddenly downcast expression. Learning that Captain Levi was still with the doctor made her nervous. She knew how much worse his wounds were compared to theirs. It was distressing to realise that, despite how hard the captain tried to keep up with everyone, he had still suffered the most, and the fact that he was alive and would be okay seemed like some kind of miracle. Mikasa immediately shook her head, suspecting she was drifting into her thoughts again.       “What are you all planning to do next?”       The guys exchanged glances. They had all had time to think about this more than once. Each understood that they needed to do something, to occupy themselves with something, but no one had a clear plan. Connie broke the silence first.       “I’m going to try to return to Paradis. If Ymir’s curse is lifted and all the titans are gone now, there’s a chance my mom also returned to her human body. I want to find her and maybe help rebuild our village.”       “I want to see my mom, too,” Jean picked up. “I hope the island is still okay, and I can get home safely. She’s probably waiting for me.”       Their plans sounded so simple, and even if it was unclear now how the murderers of Eren Yeager, the newly minted enemies, could get back to the island, they still had a tangible goal. And this goal noticeably propelled them forward. Only a little over a week had passed, and they were already ready for action, which certainly couldn’t be said for Mikasa. She had no reason to return. And to whom? Armin was still here, but she had no one else left. Mikasa didn’t answer them. She just smiled at the guys, noticing the relief on their faces. They probably hoped she was coming to her senses. It was a pity they couldn’t understand everything that was going on inside her.       “What are your plans?” Armin asked with interest. “What would you like to do?”       Mikasa smirked. What she would like to do was unspeakable. Mikasa had been trying to enact her little plan all this time, but something kept stopping her.       Fear? No. Something much more serious. It seemed that somewhere deep inside, she was still holding onto a thread of life and didn’t want to let it go for anything. Just like back then in Trost, when Armin had shattered her with the news that Eren had been eaten by a titan. Back then, Mikasa hadn’t given up, and it had paid off in full. Only now it was final. Now she could no longer expect Eren to somehow magically be with her again, and that caused unbearable suffering. But she couldn’t end it. All that remained was to accept it and hope that the pain of loss would eventually subside, and Mikasa could someday live a normal life, despite all the shocks that had happened in such a short time.       “I don’t know. Probably nothing.”       Her voice sounded hollow, as if that small, living spark that had just kindled inside her had been extinguished. Armin put a hand on her shoulder.       “I saw Annie the other day. She stopped by. Her house survived, and she’s offering for me to stay here with her and her father.”       “I’m happy for you.”       Mikasa completely slumped, realising that even Armin had someone to return to. However strange, very short, and complicated their history with Annie was, their glances on the ship spoke for themselves. Mikasa genuinely wanted her friend to be happy, but her inner torment and envy resisted it.       “We’d like you to move in with us. I’m leaving tomorrow.”       Jean and Connie looked at each other in confusion, not knowing if they should say something. Should they congratulate Armin? And how would Mikasa react to such a statement?       “Hey, that’s not a bad idea!” Connie began. “No point in you cooping yourself up here all alone, right?”       Jean, sensing an opportunity, also picked up the conversation:       “And if you don’t want to stay here, we can all return to Paradis together. We can’t be considered enemies of the people forever, right? I’d be happy if you came with me. My mom would be happy to meet you.”       Jean smiled, waiting for an answer, brushing aside the fact that he had literally just proposed that Mikasa live with him, but then he felt Armin elbow him in the side.       They looked at each other reproachfully: Armin, displeased with such a bold offer, glared at Jean, who in turn was already getting angry for not even being given a chance. Mikasa seemed not to notice any of this and answered all of them and no one in particular.       “Thank you for your concern, but I’ll stay here. If I am to start a new life, I’ll do it on my own.”       “What do you mean,'if'?”       Armin looked at her with displeasure once again. He was worried and afraid for Mikasa, scared that she really might do something to herself. And he wouldn’t be able to influence her in any way.       “Nothing, don’t pay it any mind. Just don’t forget to visit me, okay?”       “Okay,” Armin said reluctantly, and she looked meaningfully at all of them.       “I think I’d better think things over alone,” Mikasa said, and the guys exchanged glances again. It became clear that it would still be a long time before Mikasa came to her senses. They understood the magnitude of the shock she had experienced and that expecting her to jump out of bed joyful for a new day was simply foolish. Making sure that Mikasa really was coping on her own, that she looked much better, they left the room.

✦❘༻༺❘✦

      Closer to lunch, doctor came to see Mikasa to check on her condition.       “I see you’re feeling much better?”       “A little easier, thank you.”       Mikasa gave a slight smile to the doctor, who had stoically endured her caprices of the previous days and understood her condition. She just hadn’t wanted to see it before. And only now did she realise how she must have looked in his eyes. Like a capricious child unwilling to accept help. Mikasa lowered her eyes and said quietly:       “I’m sorry.”       “Not at all, don’t mention it.”       “No, no, you must have had a lot to do, and you had to fuss over me when I barely even have any injuries.”       Mikasa felt she had been taking up his time, that she didn’t need help at all, and that she didn’t need a separate room either, and her cheeks flushed.       “Wounds of the soul can torment no less than wounds of the body,” the doctor said with a soft smile and, assuring himself that the girl would surely recover now, left her room, knowing that today he wouldn’t have to fight for at least one patient.       Mikasa watched him go with a grateful look.

✦❘༻༺❘✦

      The captain was far less fortunate. His injuries were so severe that it was unclear how he had managed to survive in the forest. When Levi told the doctor the story about the major stitching up his face, they simply didn’t want to believe him. It was understandable why. These people hadn’t fought for their freedom and lives. They had never been stitched up on the spot, with whatever was at hand. To the doctor, this whole story must have seemed like a stupid fabrication from the fevered mind of a barely conscious Levi.       But it was the truth. Hange had bandaged him haphazardly, nursed him back to health, pulled him from the brink of death only to throw him back into this hell.       And he had continued to fight on equal terms with everyone. For the sacrifice Hange had made. The doctor, of course, didn’t know about the Ackerman strength, but even that wouldn’t have helped him understand how this man was still holding on.       However, Levi, despite the severity of his wounds, was recovering rapidly. One could endlessly marvel at how he could calmly and steadfastly endure all the pain in his body, and not only remain conscious but live the completely ordinary life of a hospital patient, while others with far less terrible wounds sometimes couldn’t even get up. Levi sensed the doctor’s confusion every time he came to examine and treat him, but only now began to understand why. Levi, of course, had noticed how the other patients made almost no progress in their treatment, while he was already feeling not so terrible. Yes, his body hurt badly, but pain was a completely familiar thing for a Scout. No, he didn’t have some magical power that made wounds heal like scratches on a dog, but the captain was very lucky to have been born much stronger and more resilient than the others.       “Mr. Ackerman, you are making a rapid recovery. At this rate, we could discharge you as early as next week. You’ll be able to manage without our help, if you wish, of course.”       The doctor looked at him with the same slightly surprised expression and waited for some answer.       Levi thought. He, like so many others, now had nowhere to go. He hadn’t even thought about returning to the island. So what was he to do then? Yes, he could still stay in the hospital, especially now that the doctor was openly saying he was free to stay here as long as he wanted. But did he need that? Even if Levi spent another couple of weeks here, the situation outside the hospital walls wouldn’t change. He would still need to figure out how and where to live, find a new purpose, and finally recover completely.       “I’ll be ready to leave as soon as you deem it possible.”       He looked at the doctor with confidence, and the latter, nodding in response, went off to help other patients. Connie and Jean had already returned, which meant his subordinate was alone again and was surely sinking into her awful thoughts. Levi wondered if he should bother her now. The look on the guys' faces suggested things hadn’t gone too smoothly. Levi couldn’t understand why he felt so drawn to helping this gloomy girl, but, gathering his courage and expecting more tears, he headed to her room anyway.

✦❘༻༺❘✦

      Mikasa sat, completely immersed in her thoughts, and didn’t immediately hear the knock on the door. She guessed without mistake who it was. Levi knocked more insistently, and only after a muffled “yes” did he enter.       “How are you, Ackerman?”       “Given our situation, you can’t really say 'it’s been worse' anymore.”       “Making jokes, that’s a good start.”       The captain sat on the edge of the bed without asking permission. And it would probably be foolish to try and ask now, when he had even managed to nap here. Mikasa turned to face him, and it was clear she was deeply troubled again. Levi didn’t need to ask. It was all obvious, but he still couldn’t stay silent.       “Stop beating around the bush. If you want to say something, say it.”       Levi looked at her intently, but his cold eyes showed no hostility. He looked with interest, wariness, with sympathy. He wanted to tell her everything that was on his mind, but Mikasa held back. She wasn’t ready to pour out everything that was troubling her so deeply. Too much was tormenting her soul.       “The guys came…”       Mikasa fell silent again, unsure if she should talk about her worries now. Now that she was starting to come to her senses, along with consciousness came the understanding that Mikasa wasn’t the only one suffering from loss. Her comrades and the captain had also lost those close to them, but they were holding up much better than she was. And she had already laid her soul bare, put it on display, as if only she were in pain. The realisation came too quickly, and shame made her fall silent.       “But anyway, it’s nothing. Everything’s fine.”       Mikasa forced something resembling a smile and turned away to hide her eyes, which were filling up with tears again. She so wanted someone to understand her and not judge her for such weakness, but she was sure that with her worries, she was only annoying everyone around her. It was hard for them, too, but they were holding on. And she had turned from a strong and brave soldier into a weepy mess.       “Ackerman,” Levi called to her, touching her shoulder. He noticed how strangely calming this gesture was for her and now touched her much more boldly, testing the boundaries of what was allowed. “If I didn’t want to talk to you, I wouldn’t have come here. But if you continue to be mysteriously silent, I’ll leave.”       Mikasa turned to him again, only to see the now-familiar expression on his face. Something between irritation and indifference to what was happening around him. But his words made Mikasa believe that nothing bad would happen if she told him again everything she was thinking. She had already said it more than once. Repeating it all over again was awkward, but Levi had come to listen to her. Despite his own difficult fate, he alone was trying to look into the depths of her soul.       Seeing the captain as her listener was unusual. They hadn’t been close in the Scout Regiment, but during the last battle, something had changed. Mikasa felt it. It was as if he could see right through her and understood everything she said and felt. Was it because they had both lost the people closest to them in the battle? Mikasa forced herself not to cry.       “Armin is leaving tomorrow. He’s staying with Annie and her father, and Connie and Jean want to go back home. I’m being left all alone.”       Mikasa wrapped her arms around herself, as if trying to shut out what was happening, but it didn’t get any easier. Yes, she had refused to go with any of them herself, and she wasn’t going to tell the captain that, but she really hadn’t wanted to.       They would start new lives, they still had a chance to be happy, and all that remained of her was a pitiful semblance, a shell of the former Mikasa, with no hope left for a bright future. Mikasa didn’t want to ruin their lives with her sullen appearance, and she didn’t want that terrible pity in their eyes, as if she were some animal thrown out the door in bad weather.       “Stupid brat.”       Mikasa flinched at his muted, soft, calming voice. The curse word sounded too gentle to be directed at his subordinate.       “Where do you even get these thoughts in your head? If you don’t want to be alone, then stop pushing people away. Especially those who want to help you.”       Mikasa continued to listen carefully to everything he said, but she only wanted to argue. None of her friends truly wanted to help her. They had their own plans for life, and they just wanted to support her. She would definitely be in Armin’s way. She didn’t want to intrude on his life. And on the island, at home, she had nothing and no one left. She would never live with Jean. There was no point in deceiving him or herself. They were leaving, voluntarily crossing her out of their lives. No one was truly interested in what she was going to do or how. No one, except Levi.       “But you stayed.”       The captain fell silent. Levi himself was surprised that instead of lying in bed for the first time in his life at his leisure, unafraid that something terrible would happen, he was here, trying to comfort this girl. Why did he need this? Levi couldn’t answer that question for himself. He just felt that he wasn’t ready to simply forget about her, as if all those years of fighting side by side had never happened.       “I’ve gotten used to your foul temper, Ackerman.”       He himself didn’t know why he was doing this, why he was saying such stupid things, but he felt it was right, that this was how it should be. The words flowed in a coherent stream, bypassing his consciousness, and, forgetting common sense, the impression he might make, without having time to think properly, Levi said:       “Stay with me in Marley.”       Mikasa didn’t immediately process what the captain had proposed to her, and she couldn’t believe she was okay and hadn’t misheard. She could only sit on the bed, feeling his hand on her shoulder, staring at the captain wide-eyed, trying to understand, to gather all the pieces of the mosaic in her head.       “What?”       “Didn’t think you had hearing problems,” the captain said. Her indecisiveness and sudden, uncharacteristic timidity were beginning to irritate him. He didn’t want to repeat himself, but he held back, understanding how unexpected and strange his invitation must have sounded to her.       “If you don’t want to be alone, stay with me. The doctor said I can be discharged next week, and I don’t intend to stay here longer than necessary. In any case, returning to the island is too dangerous, and here we still have a chance for a new life.”       He continued to look at her intently, waiting for some kind of answer. Levi felt extremely foolish, didn’t understand why he suddenly wanted Mikasa to stay with him, what “we” he was talking about, and realised that Mikasa could simply misunderstand him. It was pointless to say anything else now. And how to interpret his words was now her business. The captain decided not to resist his desire to stay near her. How many times had he ignored his own feelings when duty called? He wanted to forget everything and act as his heart, not cold calculation, dictated. And his heart told him he didn’t want to leave Mikasa alone.       “Captain, I…” Her voice was quiet and embarrassed, but Levi was already prepared to stand his ground. He needed to understand what she wanted, so as not to waste his own time just wiping her tears. If she truly trusted him, she should make a decision.       “Where has all your resolve gone, Mikasa? Say yes or no, and let’s end it here.”       Goosebumps ran down her skin when Captain Levi said her name. Something inside her quivered at the tone of his voice. She suddenly felt strange. A spark ignited something in her chest like… anticipation?       Mikasa frantically thought about how to answer him. Wouldn’t it be wild to agree to stay in Marley with the captain? Together? Her whole being urged her—she had to agree. She really was afraid of being alone and felt that Levi wouldn’t beg her. Maybe she really wanted this, maybe these were the words she had been waiting for, which was why she had rejected her friends?       “Yes,” Mikasa whispered the word very quietly, barely audibly, afraid of her own voice, afraid that Levi would misunderstand her if she seemed too happy. She didn’t understand why she wanted so much to stay with him, but quickly chalked it up to a strong fear of loneliness.       “Good.”       The captain exhaled, satisfied with the answer, and removed his hand from her shoulder, getting to his feet. As he was leaving the room, he tossed over his shoulder, “See you at dinner,” and closed the door behind him.