wanderer's lullaby

Winter continued to look down at the ocean while she rode on the ferry. It was strange to be this close to the ocean. In Atlas, water meantdeathwith how cold it was. She had been told to stay away from water as much as she possibly could. She had never learned to swim because of that prevailing mindset. Even the Special Operatives hadn’t taught her to swim, simply because hypothermia would set in relatively quickly and cause death with how cold Solitas was on the whole. She had never left Atlas before this, so she hadn’t needed to know how to swim. But she knew it was a good way to cool off, so she might actually want to consider learning… The house had air conditioning, but it didn’t mean going for a swim wouldn’t be a good idea. Of course, it would get cold soon enough, but it might not be a bad thing to learn… When she got to the ferry house, she called a taxi and gave them the address to the stationary store. The driver thankfully didn’t try to make small talk with her which she was glad for. She really didn’t want to talk to people unnecessarily. The one woman she’d talked to made sense since they were both from Atlas… But for the standard Valian driver, she really didn’t want to talk to them. It just felt completely unnecessary. She really just wanted to be left alone most of the time. Right now, though… Yeah. She was definitely anxious. When they arrived at the store, she paid the fare, and then got out. She went to the planner section and found that most were ‘student’ planners that went through the academic year. Well…that did make some modicum of sense. It was late in the year, so having full-year planners that would only go for a few months didn’t make any sense. Anything that started in January really didn’t make sense. Though she did also find empty planners that one could date that could start at any point. That was definitely nice… She took note of the features she wanted from different planners and jotted them down into the chat with the AI. She just got a thumbs up from the little avatar each time she put a feature in. She spent a good hour looking at different planners and taking note of what features she wanted and would be good for her. The AI had a little window where it took note of her features. What she wanted was something where she could block time out and have a task list. She didn’t want a huge set of features by any means, but it would definitely take a bit of finagling. Then again, the AI was making it, probably back at the house. She wasn’t sure if it was or not, though… She really didn’t need anything flashy or fancy, at least. She just wanted something simple that could let her block time out and list her tasks for the day. She also looked at the different sizes of paper as well. She wasn’t sure if she wanted A4 or A5 paper. The A5 would be smaller, but the A4 would offer more room to write. A5 would be more portable which was necessary if she was going to be out a lot… She really wasn’t sure which she’d rather have. She picked up an A4 and an A5 planner cover. She also picked up some A4 and A5 paper, then some hole punches. She was definitely weirded out seeing the A5 planner having a six-ring hole punch instead of a three-ring, but it was what she needed, so it was what she got. She was trying to keep costs down, but she needed all of this. The A5 paper was more expensive than A4 by a long shot, when compared to the amount of pages she got for the price. Yeesh. Finally, after having a few bags filled with stuff, she called another taxi and headed back to Patch. She went back to the laptop and sat down. “So I have a few mockups that I made for you,” the AI said, pulling up some word documents. They weren’t anything fancy; they just looked like tables. “We can customise them after you figure out which ones you like more.” They went back and forth for quite a while. She wanted a monthly, weekly, and daily view for each. After that, they changed the font, the colors of the cell tables, and the borders. It looked a lot more professional than she thought it would, considering it was just tables. It looked really nice afterward and Winter glanced down at her scroll. It was honestly about time she should be leaving to go meet with Harriet’s friends… “I’ll be back later.” “All right; talk to you then.” The AI waved to Winter, though she did pull up the burner scroll with the information she needed to see where she was going. She went to the ferry and called another cab and went to Hope Haven Gender Clinic. She bounced her leg a bit which she knew was unsightly, but she still couldn’t shake the fact that she was meeting with somebody she had never met before. And they wanted to make sure she wasn’t going to upset their transgender friend. She couldn’t blame them; Winter still didn’t reallyunderstandit, but was it truly hurting anybody else? She could at least respect the fact that May was still apersonthat deserved kindness and understanding. She didn’t want to come across as offensive and she hoped that it wouldn’t seem that way. She arrived at Hope Haven a little while later, her mouth dry and throat extremely thick. She couldn’t quite fully swallow the knot that had formed there. She really didn’t want to be offensive, though she knew there was a good chance that she would say something that would be quite out there. It was so hard to keep her anxiety under wraps and put up the solid mask that she’d held up most of her life. It was easy around men because they were monsters that only wanted to hurt her. But around people that she didn’t want to offend…? A much harder thing to deal with. Not being around the Atlassian military and normal Atlassian decorum for a few weeks now had definitely made her unable to handle herself as she used to. She saw a tall, darker skinned woman sitting at the entrance of the clinic on a bench with a woman who had sheep ears sticking out of the side of her head. Those had to be the two she was looking for. She swallowed hard and braced herself. Should she be kinder and less stiff? Eventhatwould be hard, considering she wasn’t used to being relaxed around strangers. So much could go wrong with this and she didn’t know what to do about it. She just wanted to make a good impression. First impressions wereeverythingin Atlassian society and she knew that, if she failed here, that it wouldn’t go over well. Damn it all. This was so hard. She walked over to the pair who had paper coffee cups in their hands and they looked at Winter. “So you’re the disinherited Schnee heiress, huh?” the dark-skinned woman asked. Winter shifted a bit but nodded. “Yes, I am Winter Schnee.” That wasn’t the first thing she was expecting and it definitely put her on her back foot. “Warrant Officer Bree told me that I’d be meeting up with you?” The darker-skinned woman nodded. “Yeah. I’m Joanna Greenleaf, though most people just call me Jo. And this is Fiona.” Fiona looked nervous, her ears twitching. “Um, hello.” She dipped her head, though she avoided eye contact with Winter. She was pretty sure she knew what was on Fiona’s mind, but she wasn’t sure if she should call it out or not. Just try to reassure her that shedidn’thate Faunus like Gelé did. Sigh. Might as well bite the bullet. Winter dipped her head to Fiona. “I understand you’re probably afraid of me due to my being a Schnee, but I’m not like Mr. Gelé. Idon’thate Faunus, nor do I look down on them. You deserve as much respect as anybody else.” It was one thing if the person was a monster like Gelé (who barely counted as a person in her mind), but Faunus were people too. Most weren’t awful like he was. They just wanted to exist and have good lives like most other people. All Winter cared about personally was saving Weiss, rather than having a good life. If Weiss could have a good life, then Winter would die happy. All that mattered was Weiss. Fiona’s ears went down and she looked around nervously. “Forgive me if I don’t believe you…” Winter bowed to her. “I’ll prove it to you, then.” That was all shecoulddo. It would take time, but shehadearned the trust of the few Faunus that existed within the Special Operatives. At least while she’d been there. It still hurt to know she could never go back to being in the military even if it was a deeply corrupt organisation. Then again, no organisation in Atlas had its hands clean. The SDChadbeen the best one at one point, but now, it was no better than its colleagues. She hated that fact. “I intend to return to the SDC to the way my grandfather ran it in due time.” Assuming she could take it down. With her plans shattered by Gelé, she wasn’t sure if she could take over the company as was her birthright, but she wouldn’t stop fighting for it until the day that she died. Fiona nodded a bit, her ears still twitching. “I-I see…” “Well, how about we go to a café and talk for a little while?” Joanna suggested. “Very well.” Winter nodded then dipped her head. “Lead the way.” She had no real idea where in town she was. She knew she was putting a lot of trust into these two women to not jump her and do something to her, but Harriet had treated her well. She doubted the warrant officer would do something that would put her in danger. Still… It was definitely nerve wracking to be alone with two strangers who were obviously more experienced than she was. She was good, one of the best the Atlassian military had to offer, but other people still had more experience than she did and could overwhelm her, especially two on one. She hadn’t been keeping up with her training either… It was just so hard to figure out what to do in her daily life. She knew she should keep up her training, but it was hard… They went over to a café a block or so away. By time they arrived, Winter was huffing and puffing from the Valian heat. She had Valian clothes on, but the heat continued to get to her. She would probablyneverget used to it. She despised how hot it was…and according to Qrow, it wasn’t even the hottest Valecouldget. It was September, so it was cooling down abitfrom the hottest part of the year. She wasnotlooking forward to there being hotter months in Vale next year. Thankfully, the café was cool inside and they motioned to Winter to go to the counter. She hesitated as she looked at the menu. She had never been in a coffee shop before. She only did caffeine when sheabsolutely neededit because it made her jittery and worsened her anxiety. She really didn’t need her anxiety to be any worse right now. So she approached the counter. “Um, do you have any caffeine-free options?” She had no idea what to make of the menu. She still wasn’t used to having much choice in general. “Oh yes, we do! We have passion tango tea which is iced. It’s got hibiscus, lemongrass, and apple in it. It’s completely herbal. We also have a lemonade version if you want some extra flavor.” “I’ll have that, then.” She really needed to avoid the caffeine right now. She was beyond anxious. And thankfully it was an iced tea which meant the cool temperature would help keep the heat away from the trek over here. It was called Grimm and Grounds which she had never heard of before. Then again, it wasn’t like she was a connoisseur of coffee houses or anything. She was just glad they had some sort of non-caffeinated option for people like her. She did see they had hot chocolate on the menu, but thelastthing she wanted in this weather was something hot. The barista nodded and set about making her order. Winter waited, swallowing hard. She couldn’t shake the feeling of being awkward and unwelcome. She wasn’t the type to hate people just because she didn’t understand. Joanna and Fiona were skeptical at best, for which she didn’t blame them. Expectinganybodyfrom Atlas to accept somebody like May was a tall order. She did not understand, but she didn’t hate. She would likelyneverunderstand what May had been through as she hadn’t been born in the wrong body, but she didn’t hate May for it. She was trying to learn and not be so ignorant to people that were different from her. The barista handed her the plastic cup and the trio sat down. “So why are you so interested in May?” Joanna asked. “Warrant Officer Bree said she had some friends here in Vale… I wanted to make contact with you so that way I could potentially have somebody to talk to while I’m here in Vale.” It was hard to admit, but it was the truth. “It’s not just May I’m interested in; it’s just…having somebody that…understands.” Being vulnerable was even more difficult for her. Especially with strangers. She wasn’t even vulnerable withQrowyet, or at least not out of choice. She could see he had no real negative intents at this point, but it didn’t mean that opening up waseasy.She felt so alone and isolated here in Vale. Nobody understood what she’d been through as an Atlassian woman… Joanna gave Winter a sympathetic look. “Somebody that understands? How canweunderstand what aSchnee’sbeen through?” She scoffed. Yeah, that was about the reaction Winter had expected unfortunately. Nobody knew the awful upbringing she’d been through. Winter took a sip of her tea, her eyes downcast. “I’ve been through what most Atlassian women have gone through, perhaps worse,” she admitted quietly. “I can’t understand May’s predicament, but I was groomed to be nothing but a wife and mother. Mr. Gelé was not kind to me or my sister.” She knew Whitley existed, but that wasit.She hadn’t even known about him until after she’d left Schnee manor. She didn’t know anything about him other than what Weiss told her. Apparently he was like a mini-Gelé which…wasn’t inspiring. She had no idea if there was more to him than that… But she still wanted to get him out of there if she could.Nobodydeserved to be under Gelé’s direct influence like that. Joanna was quiet, studying her. Winter could usually hide her emotions fairly well, but not right now. Talking about the abuse withanybodywas difficult, let alone admitting it to acompletestranger. She hadn’t been spared the wrath Mr. Gelé turned on his employees and those beneath him. She was supposed to be just a pawn to him, an object to trade for collateral in business or political exchanges. But she’d developed her own mind and heart, something he would never understand. She still wasn’t great with people, but she could at least feel feelings and love Weiss with everything that she was. She wanted Weiss to be safe… That was heronlygoal in life. Weiss… She hoped that Kali and Sienna would be able to break the case and have her be brought to Vale and placed under Winter’s custody. Joanna continued to look at her. “I don’t sense any deception, but you also do have reason to lie to us. Schnees aren’t exactly known for being honest.” “I pride myself on my honesty,” Winter said, trying to bring herself back up to snuff. Admitting that she’d been abused had beenextremelyhard, so to have it thrown back in her face… Opal had done much the same thing which was frustrating at absolute best. She could understand why people didn’t believe her, but by the same token, she was trying to be honest. It was hard to be honest when someone was throwing her true history in her face. She really just wanted to be able to get her little sister out of Schnee manor and bring her somewhere better. “If you wish it, I have proof.” She didn’t really want to show anybody her abuse videos, but if that was what it took, then she would swallow her pride and show them. She sincerely had nothing to hide right now. Joanna didn’t believe her in the slightest despite the fact that she was being nothing but honest. Even with Harriet vouching for her, apparently it wasn’t enough to get others to believe her about what she’d been through. Everyone would see the truth of what she’d been through in due time, but she needed these two to understand. No, she didn’t understand what female Faunus had been through in Atlas, but she understood what women in general in Atlas went through. “If you have it, then show it to us.” Winter sighed. The last thing she wanted to do was show anybody her abuse before it was onherterms, but that was what was necessary in this case. She pulled out her scroll and opened a folder. She tapped through the folder structure and then opened one of the videos. Joanna’s face went from one of strict disbelief to absolute horror. The video showed justoneof the beatings Winter had gone through over her years. It was a short clip, only a few minutes, but it got the point across. She showed Joanna the folders. “All of this… Is all of this—” “Yes,” Winter said. “Videos of my abuse…from multiple angles. And my little sister has been no better.” Coco hadn’t found any evidence of Gelé physically abusing Whitley, though. However, just because something wasn’t physical didn’t mean it wasn’t abuse. They had videos of Whitley being manipulated verbally and abused in the same way. Abuse was abuse, no matter how it happened. Verbal wasn’t any less impactful than physical. It just didn’t hurt as much physically was all. It really did hurt and impact a person regardless. “I… Damn. I knew Gelé was a monster, but I didn’t think it extended to his own family.” Winter nodded. “He is a monster. There is no humanity in him. I’m fairly certain my siblings and I were all children of rape. Willow Schnee is a drunk that also takes sleeping pills.” How the woman hadn’t died yet was beyond her honestly. The combination was known to be deadly, but Willow somehow hadn’t died from them yet. She had no idea how that worked… But she had no relationship with the woman that had given birth to her. Absolutely none. The only memory she had of Willow not being drunk was from when she’d been a toddler and had her aura unlocked. Willow had unlocked her aura to protect her from Gelé’s abuses. Joanna cringed. “No wonder she’s not been in the public eye… How did you evensurvivethat treatment, Winter? Most people wouldn’t be able to withstand that for as long as you have. Let alone knowing they had a sibling going through the same thing.” Winter shrugged. “I survived because I had to. People can and will survive lots of things you think they wouldn’t be able to.” She looked at Fiona. “I know plenty of people survive the SDC mines as well as the brandings. They keep working because they must. It is not easy, but people will find ways to survive even when it seems impossible.” Fiona looked down, her ears drooping. “Yeah… The mines are awful. I grew up working in them, at least until I got a break and was able to go into Atlas Academy…not that that was easy either…” She sighed. “At least I didn’t get branded.” “I truly am sorry for what you’ve had to endure. Ihada plan to take down the SDC…but it got…derailed.” She wasn’t going to give up from getting Weiss into her custody (and hopefully Whitley as well). But the SDC was another thing entirely. Right now, she was just focused on getting Valian citizenship. That was all she could do right now. That and try to get a GED. Without it, she wouldn’t really be able to work too many jobs. It wasn’t as good as a high school diploma, but she was too old to go to high school, and she wouldn’t have the qualifications to graduate either. There was no way Gelé would release her academic records to her, though, and she knew it. All she could do was study and work to get her GED. She wasn’t certain if she wouldeverbe able to take over the SDC at this point… Joanna rubbed Fiona’s shoulder. “You’re part of the Happy Huntresses now, Fi. You don’t have to worry.” Fiona nodded. “And I’m glad for that.” Her tone was still defeated and sullen. Joanna looked at Winter. “Well, I do believe you about your abuse now. But I’m still not sure if I should let you near May. What do you think about trans people?” “I feel as if I’m not qualified to make a statement. I know next to nothing about trans people and nonbinary people. However, their experiences are not my own lived ones, and I willneverlive what they have. Regardless, they are stillpeopleand deserve respect as long as they have not committed atrocities such as much of the Atlassian upper class has. Those are my feelings.” “That’s…one way to view it. But I guess that’s enough. I’ll just have to trust it for right now.” Joanna sighed. “Plus, Hare said you were trustworthy and willing to learn… All I can do really is trust her word. I know she wouldn’t steer us wrong, but I just wanted to be more confident that you were who she said you were. Considering how the SDC has treated workers, especially Faunus ones…” Winter nodded. “I understand your trepidation fully.” She really did. Atlas was an oppressive state at absolute best. She knew it wasn’t a good place…but it was stillhometo her. She wasn’t sure if Vale wouldeverbe home. There were just so many hangups and things stonewalling her from progressing. If she could get her citizenship, that would make thingssomuch easier. “Do you…understand what Atlassian women go through?” TheywereAtlassian women, but she wasn’t sure how their upbringing would differ from hers. She wasn’t sure if they had been abused like her at all or anything. She had no idea how the upper class differed from the lower class in terms of upbringing. Joanna nodded. “Oh yeah, I sure do. My parents wanted to marry me off to a much older man when I was only thirteen. But I’ve always been pretty strong willed and rebellious, so I didn’t listen to what they wanted. I proved to be too much for the man they wanted me to marry, so he broke off the marriage contract. They were incredibly frustrated because they wanted to get higher on the social ladder. But they didn’t take into account the fact thatIhave feelings and thoughts of my own.” She sighed. “I was tossed out after the contract ended. Another family took me in and let me go to Atlas Academy when I was seventeen.” “I’m sorry.” Winter understood thatalltoo well. She had been too strong willed for Gelé…but he had been his own undoing when it came to her. He had tried to educate her and she had taken it to heart. She hadn’t allowed him to control her whenever possible. Willow had also told her not to believe what he told her. She had clung to that her whole life and understood that most everything out of Gelé’s mouth was a lie. She hadn’t been able to fully authenticate most things until she’d gotten a scroll to her, smuggled in by Coco, but she knew that most things coming out of his mouth were filth and lies. She hoped that she could show Weiss the world as it truly was one day…but right now, she had to have faith in Kali and Sienna and trust that they would be able to get Weiss (and hopefully Whitley) out from under Gelé’s thumb. Joanna shrugged. “It is what it is. I’ve always been a fighter and my family just didn’t like it. Never really listened well.” Her tone was light. A joke, but Winter could see the pain behind it. She understood that pain all too well. Winter was too rebellious and she was pretty sure Weiss now fell under that too. She really hoped that her little sister wouldn’t have a marriage contract arranged before Kali and Sienna could free her… He would only have the contract arranged, but thesecondshe turned seventeen… Winter shivered at the thought. No, she had to have faith that Kali and Sienna would be able to handle things. Trials could drag and last formonthsif notyears.She hoped that wouldn’t be the case here… But she also knew Gelé had endless pockets and that he would fight tooth and nail to keep his other two children under his thumb. He would have the best lawyers money could buy, but it sounded like Kali and Sienna were quite the duo that could keep him at bay and give him a run for his money. “My experience is different since I’m a Faunus,” Fiona said. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” Winter said gently. Fiona was clearly a bit flighty and shy. Fitting for a sheep Faunus. Winter just didn’t feel like shehadto tell her story. They were strangers, having only met a short time ago. Joanna seemed to not reallycareif she shared her story. But Fiona might be different. Winter didn’t want to press on a sensitive area with a stranger. Winter…didn’t like talking about her own story either, but in this case…it was squarely necessary to gain their trust. She just hated that it had takenthat muchto get them to agree to let her meet May. Harriet had vouched for her for certain, but even that apparently wasn’t enough for them. Frustrating, but the videos showed that she was telling the truth about what she’d been through. Fiona nodded, a look of relief spreading over her face. “All right.” “So yeah, I guess we should go meet up with May. She doesn’t have much going on today, so let’s head back.” Joanna stood up and started to leave the café. Winter followed at a job. Well, this certainly would be an interesting experience… She just hoped that May wouldn’t hate her simply for being a Schnee…