A second chance

      Incessant thunderclaps split the firmament, unable to withstand the wrath of the enraged Gods. Each lightning bolt, dazzlingly bright in the sky covered with oppressively black clouds, is accompanied by a deafening roar. It seems to be night, but that’s the last thing that bothers me at the moment. I think I’m lying on the ground, I think I’m even in the mud, but I don’t care about that either. I don’t hear thunder and I don’t see lightning, and I don’t feel cold. All I have in front of my eyes is the image of a girl. Who is she? Do I know her? Long red hair, flowing in a light breeze; a slender, tanned body, dressed in a light-colored dress tied at the waist with a long silk ribbon, barely covering her sharp knees; bare feet, which the girl allowed to tickle a small, golden-green grass; plump, inviting lips and bottomless blue eyes reflecting light three huge suns. I know her for sure. She smiles at me, calls my name and holds out her hand. Sandrof. Is that my name? And her? Does it look like Ile? …Ild… Ildhar! Who is she? Why is her image standing in front of me? The mind clears up a bit. And at the same time, I feel increasing pain and I can’t feel my legs. The image disappears, and the sky appears before me with an incessant barrage of lightning and leaden-black clouds. I’m starting to hear. A thunderstorm makes me shudder, screams and moans bring back memories, some prayers show the reality in which I woke up… Something hot is running down my face, and something is squeezing my hand. I turn my head with difficulty and freeze. This is the girl whose image disappeared a moment ago. She’s different now. Pale, scarred skin, matted hair covered with dirt and blood, tattered clothes that looked more like a military uniform than the vestments of a heavenly angel. Her face is not illuminated by that sunny smile, and her once charming eyes… are empty, they have neither those emotions nor life at all, only a reflection of Hell on earth, as if in a dusty mirror. She squeezes my hand… no, I’m holding her hand in mine. She doesn’t move, she doesn’t breathe, her heart doesn’t beat. Why does the realization of this make my heart ache? Why is a tear rolling down my cheek? It merges with the blood. Is my head pierced? It doesn’t matter. This pain cannot be compared with the pain in the heart. I hear footsteps, but I dare not take my eyes off the girl’s face. Someone is shouting my name, but I don’t want to respond at all. The only thing I want is to die. And I’m dying clutching Ildhar’s hand. I’m dying thinking about her, and I don’t feel any pain again.       I jumped up on the bed, dropping a pillow on the floor, breathing heavily and not knowing what to catch my eyes on. The first thought that came to me was: “Where am I?” But after a couple of seconds I calmed down and realized that I was at home. The familiar gray wallpaper gave me the opportunity to wake up, and a glass of warm water on the bedside table finally brought consciousness back to reality. It was a dream. It’s just a dream. I just had a nightmare. Wait, why do I remember him? Strange. Usually, after a couple of seconds, I even forget the nightmares, but here… The alarm clock did not allow me to completely withdraw into myself, it beeped disgustingly and reminded me that Monday had already come, and was waiting for me to accomplish things, because hard days would follow. Irritably turning off this “miracle” of technology, I lifted my sleepy ass and trudged into the shower, which, of course, turned out to be busy. From behind the closed door, a pleasant female voice could be heard humming another Zemfira song. Does he wake up earlier than me on principle? — Dee, — I heard instead of a new track, — bring a towel, pliz. I know you’re outside the door. — And how could I hire such a harmful splinter? I muttered, but Elsa heard everything. — Well, I’m beautiful, smart and I still put up with you, — the girl listed, sticking out her really pretty (to put it mildly) face (she fooled all the customers), and smiled sweetly at me, showing the light of a flashing light bulb cute dimples. — I’m the one who tolerates you, — I pretended to be indignant and threw a towel at this tempting demon. — Hurry up, or I’ll take away the bonus. — Good morning to you, too, — I heard from the other side of the door. Elsa didn’t come out until ten minutes later, for which I slapped her on the back of the head and, pointing to the table where there was already a plate of omelette, headed for the shower. As soon as I was under the jets of water, the black sky immediately appeared before my eyes. I, who had already forgotten why I woke up before the annoying squeak, froze. Sandrof? My name is Diana, and what kind of name is that? And who is Ildhar? I didn’t notice the time in my thoughts and only woke up when Elsa banged on the door. — You need to sleep in a bed, — she shouted, pulling me out of my own thoughts. — Go to Hell, — I said, and walked out of the shower stall, casually wrapping myself in a towel. Before leaving, I took a look in the fogged mirror. In response, a pale girl with a sporty figure opening from under a towel, unusually white, the color of just fallen snow, wet hair (everyone thinks I’m wearing makeup) and black eyes, like the night, looked at me from the reflection. Thin, pale lips were pursed, and the main feature of my face, after my hair, of course, cheekbones, paled before the bags under my eyes burdening a tired look. - I need a vacation,— I sighed and left the bathroom.       — Elsa, — I called the girl falling asleep, lightly tapping on the steering wheel and not paying attention to the cork that was not even thinking of dissolving, — do you remember if I mentioned any Ildhar? — Is that a last name? Elsa did not understand, rubbing her eyes. She looked irritably at the dozen cars in front of her, but when she looked at me, she frowned. — Has something happened? —No, — I shook my head and leaned back in the driver’s seat. — I just had a strange dream. Relax. Elsa stared at me expectantly for a while, but gave up in the face of my indifference, and the traffic jam, meanwhile, finally began to dissolve, and now we are joking about the fine for being late, which we will write out to ourselves.

*******

      Four hard days have passed. I proudly stood up to the onslaught of a gloomy, apparently eternally dissatisfied with the environment of the fire inspection chief, an obviously elderly woman waiting for a bribe, and representatives of a bunch of different checks. When they arrived, all these important people were ready to tear and throw, already making up a list of violations on the go, but by the end of the visit, I appeared to be the devil in this whole situation, enjoying their indignation. Having survived all this abuse of the nervous system, last night, I sent Mark, my former employee who sent this disaster, on a well-deserved, long journey to the places of his military glory. I didn’t dream, which, by the way, I didn’t care about, but as soon as I was distracted, just for a moment, that divine image popped up in my memory, and the whole world around me ceased to have any meaning for me. I was at work (for reference, I own a small cafe in the very center of the city, and Elsa is the manager), drinking my fifth cup of the strongest possible coffee, in an attempt not to pass out right at the table. This mission quickly began to fail, and I began to plunge into the realm of Morpheus. And to somehow cheer up, I started looking out the window. Busy people passed by, children ran by, cars drove by… and most passers-by did not even notice the small, cozy establishment squeezed into the first floor of one of the multi-storey buildings. But the first thing I saw was a girl. A red-haired girl in a light raincoat, just passing by, but it was because of her that I remembered my recent dream, so far, and not forgotten. The image of the girl I dubbed sunny appeared before my eyes again, and I instantly fell asleep.              A pleasant summer breeze stirred the leaves on the nearby trees. Three suns had recently lined up in the center of the heavens and illuminated the earth, the golden-green grass slightly pricked the skin covered with thin shirt material. Relaxed, I admire the blue sky, lingering on the rare, fluffy clouds and seeing them off from one end of the dome of the world to the other. It feels like I don’t often see blue skies and bright suns. Laughing children are running around me, it seems, playing tag, I hear someone mumbling nearby, but I do not want to turn around and be distracted, I just slightly stand up, leaning my elbows on the warmed ground to fully focus my attention on the peaceful sky. Suddenly, something screaming jumps on top of me and knocks me back to the ground. I’m already starting to compose insults, preparing to pour them out on Elsa, but then it dawns on me that the voice is different, and Elsa never called me Sandrof. Wait, Sandrof?! Before I know it, I feel someone else’s soft lips on my lips. My eyes close reflexively, and I give myself up to a gentle kiss, putting my arm around the girl’s waist. Somewhere I hear an approving whistle, and I lose my tenderness. The girl jumps off me and rushes towards the violators of our idyll. He immediately falls down, laughing hysterically. Tickling is the best punishment — moderately innocent, but at the same time quite cruel. I laugh at this performance for a minute, until I realize that the girl from the dream kissed me. Now she is exactly the same as in the last dream. She’s wearing the same dress, the same hairstyle adorns her fiery red hair, and behind her is the same landscape that I just now attached importance to. The girl got up from the still laughing guy, taking pity on him and returning the opportunity to breathe, and, shaking herself off, came up to me and held out her hand to me. — Sandrof, — she called softly, and without thinking about anything, I immediately get up. I take her hand, interlacing my fingers, and follow her. We’re leaving the clearing. Ildhar leads me to a building that looks a little like a town hall from computer games, but then I squeeze her hand and pull her in the other direction. We find ourselves in some kind of house, a little away from the town hall. I don’t let go of her hand, and as soon as the door slams shut, I press my lips to her inviting lips. The sunny girl smiles through the kiss and pushes me against the wall, but her plan is not destined to come true. Hugging the girl tightly around the waist, I turn around and press her against the rough wall myself. Ildhar’s lips open in surprise, which my tongue instantly uses. I deepen the kiss, and our tongues touch. I press Ildhar even harder against the wall, I feel her fingers tangle in my hair. Irritated, the girl reaches for the ribbon that pulls my hair back and it immediately falls apart over my shoulders. Tenderness has long given way to passion, we are fighting for supremacy, biting each other’s lips, snuggling closer to each other. My hand slides down to her hip, slightly lifting the hem of her light dress, my knee wedges between her slender legs, and Ildhar gives up. I can hear her approving moans through my hot kisses, I can feel her desperately clinging to my shoulders. I press my lips to her charming neck, putting her hands behind her head and leaving noticeable hickeys, I allow myself to bite her delicate skin, while the second hand penetrates under the hem. — Sa-androf, — she says my name through a groan, throwing her head back and giving my lips more free space. Grabbing the girl by the buttocks, I carry her to some room at the end of the house. Ildhar wraps her legs around my waist, and I feel her arousal. I get more excited…       Suddenly everything disappears, and I feel only Elsa’s hand, tightly squeezing and slightly, but with pressure, shaking my shoulder. — Di-a-na, damn it, get up! — she shouted in my ear, which, of course, woke me up. — Of course, I’m tired too, but I can’t sleep right at the table. And your coffee is already cold. — I. Hate. You, — I growled menacingly, sleepily, and, giving my friend a withering look, trudged into my office to get my things. Already getting into the car, I fully realized what exactly I was dreaming about.