Flaming Ashes

It was a terrible day. Until lunch, outside the window, there was a constant cold autumn downpour tearing off the last brown leaves from forest branches that should have fallen off long ago. It was noisy all around the headquarters: the wind was blowing, tangling in twisted branches, and howling in the crevices of the stone castle. Mikasa spent most of that long day in the barracks, with absolutely no desire to do anything. This was unusual. It was her day off, so she tried her best to enjoy her only free day, but her mind was restless, just like the weather outside the window. Although no one saw the storm brewing within her, Mikasa was suffering and tormenting herself, remaining cool and calm on the outside. Historia had been doing some stupid paperwork in the captain's office for a few hours in a row, while Mikasa was burning with jealousy and the inability to find out why the hell she had been stuck in there for so long. They had a long-established relationship with Levi. Everything was more than clear, Mikasa couldn't ask for more than she had already had, and it seemed that everything was fine with both of them, but every day Mikasa felt worse, not knowing what to do with this feeling eating her out from the inside. Exhausted by unpleasant thoughts, not caring that icy rain was still drizzling outside, Mikasa ran out into the forest wearing only her sports uniform. Training always helped to put her thoughts in order, and now she could hope that the surrounding dirt, cold drops, piercing wind and lingering pain in exhausted muscles would help her finally come to her senses. Sharp gusts of wind lashed at the heated body. Irritated, she flew like a hurricane along the blurred forest paths, not even trying to avoid the puddles. The cold and the dampness should have brought her to her senses, but nothing worked. The fire in her chest was only getting worse. She had no right to be openly jealous of him. She mustn't even have such a feeling inside, but the heart wants what the heart wants, and the poisonous feeling of being betrayed enveloped her chest like a vile mucus over and over again. An open relationship. This is what it was. The hateful phrase was spinning in her head. Mikasa sensed it in her gut that a relationship could only be open if both partners didn't care about each other, if sex was a way to relax and relieve tension and that's it. It was easier to receive it by agreement rather than to build some kind of trust and affection that would burden your existence. But Mikasa couldn't be like this. She cared. She loved him. It seemed that she really loved him. Just like they say in silly women's novels — to the point of trembling in the knees, sparkling eyes and incessant tingle in the chest. Only Levi didn't reciprocate her feelings at all. He was gentle and kind to her only when they were alone in private, and after that he hastily put on the usual detached, cold, mocking expression on his face and became that version of himself that Mikasa naturally hated. She would have liked to hear a warm word from him at least once in a while, but it was just a dream that was simply not destined to come true. It was her own fault. She shouldn't have indulged her weaknesses and agreed to this. "It will be easier if no one knows about us," the captain said then, and Mikasa simply obeyed. She never thought that she would have to hide the obvious, but she couldn't find anything to say, just nodded, believing that it would really be better, even though there was a lump of resentment in her throat that did not want to disappear. Now, day after day, she was tormented by guesses about how many more women around the barracks he had. Her thoughts were eating away at her, making it difficult for her to simply exist. She became nervous, irritable, and even more annoying than before. Mikasa stopped talking with almost everyone, realising that each of her girlfriends could be a rival. Somewhere in the back of her head, she knew it was stupid to pull away from them just because of Levi, but she couldn't help herself. It worked out by itself, and she didn't resist. It was all so stupid. She felt how hungry she was for real warmth, for the feeling she had when she first gave herself to him. It was funny now to remember how she had tried to seduce the captain. And it seemed that it would have been better if she had never noticed his looks. Levi clearly wanted her, but that wasn't enough for Mikasa. She wanted true love, a relationship, but he wasn't ready to give it to her. Now she was stepping on the same rake, finding solace in other people's hands. And how disgusting Mikasa felt, realising that she was not loyal herself, although she wanted only him. Now she was tormented by her own conscience, realising that she could not demand anything from Levi after she had started another relationship. At least it was fair. He gave Mikasa freedom, and she took advantage of it. Levi didn't want Mikasa to glue him to her, and he didn't control her in return. Although she dreamed that he would pay attention to her, she hoped that Levi would make a scene, dissatisfied with her free communication with others. Mikasa waited for him to show some interest in her, but he didn't. It was all in vain. Like a fool, she suffered for a man who didn't care. Levi didn't see, or didn't want to see, how she was aching every time she left him. It began to seem that jealousy was not in his nature. On top of that, this idiotic secrecy was infuriating. She couldn't just come and see the captain whenever she wanted, couldn't ask for a meeting herself, couldn't do anything. She had to wait for him to invite her to his place. And it was difficult to pretend that there was absolutely nothing between them. Mikasa wanted to be with him at any chance she got, but it was becoming impossible. Levi could not constantly take her as an assistant, because other soldiers who got near at a bad time, including girls, often appeared in his office. Mikasa was finishing her first lap, running past the walls of the headquarters, and accidentally glanced at the window of the commander's office. Erwin was much more courteous to her. However, Mikasa dragged herself into the same adventure again, even realising that she did not like it at all and that after all this she felt no less than disgusting. At least the commander didn't pretend that she didn't exist, but it only made it worse. Mikasa was torn by contradictions. On the one hand, she was afraid that Levi would find out, she did not want to lose him, naively hoping that someday his attitude towards her would change, on the other hand, Erwin respected her and gave her the warmth that she lacked so much.  But it wasn't Smith she saw in the window of the familiar office. Levi stood with his arms crossed over his chest, glowering at the bleak landscape around him. Just for a moment, their eyes met, and Mikasa felt as if a bolt of lightning had gone through her. Her heart, already exhausted by the exertion, seemed to beat even faster, and only her cheeks, flushed from running, saved her from a treacherous blush. She wondered if the captain understood how she really felt. But none of that mattered. Levi gave her a hand signal, and everything inside turned upside down. She wanted to see him again so much, to fall into his arms again, but it was all too humiliating. Now she felt like a real army litter, but she didn't dare say anything. Obediently, like a pet dog, Mikasa hurriedly moved towards the castle, still not ready to refuse. Levi could literally do anything with her. She didn't even try to resist. After thoroughly washing herself of street dirt and sweat, Mikasa wrapped herself in a fluffy towel and dried her hair. The cold shackled her body, but even the icy shower water did not cool her thoughts and did not bring her to her senses. Sighing heavily, she pulled on her clothes over her still-wet body and went straight to the office. It was strange that Levi was there, but this place was familiar to her. In fact, what difference does it make if it's just a fleeting meeting? At the door, she was confronted by Historia hurriedly flying out of the office. She was always too fussy, but Mikasa gave this behaviour her own distorted, painful meaning, tormenting herself with guesses even more. She was ready to howl at how much she wanted to get rid of this stupid jealousy, but she knew that it was not destined to come true. As long as Levi doesn't belong to her, as long as they're hiding from everyone. Mikasa calmly entered the office, closing the door behind her. Feelings overwhelmed her the second she caught the attentive gaze of blue eyes. Levi has changed noticeably. He didn't look so unhappy anymore. It was clear that he was glad to see Mikasa. However, she did not take it as a compliment, realising that she was allowed only so little. She could only touch him now, at this moment, and as soon as she walked out the door, everything would fall into place again, and the feelings would dissipate as if they had never existed. Levi quietly approached her, running his hand through her clean, smooth, still-damp hair. Without saying a word, he gently touched her face with his fingers, studying it, examining it carefully. Mikasa stood there, afraid to breathe. She was still shy in front of him, even though they had been doing this for so long, but every touch felt new, so unknown, intimate that Mikasa could not restrain her emotions. She twitched accidentally, from overwhelming sensations, and Levi clearly interpreted it in his own way, not at all the way it really was. But, without saying anything again, he pulled her towards him, biting into her lips with a greedy kiss. Mikasa was taken aback. He usually treated her more gently. At least at first, and now his pressure surprised and excited her. She readily responded to his hot kiss, intertwining their tongues in trembling thirst, wishing that it would last forever. In those rare moments of intimacy, she felt truly wanted. Exhaling noisily into his lips, she put her hands on his chest, forcing Levi to recoil. They obviously didn't have much time, besides, the office was of the commander, and Mikasa didn't know what the captain was doing here today, but all questions faded away now when she only wanted to quickly pull off his uniform and feel his rough hands on her body. "You're so beautiful when you're angry," Levi said with a grin, helping her pull off her jacket. He noticed. But Mikasa ignored his words, glancing briefly at his face. The captain smiled the way he did only when they were alone. To admit that she liked it was to accept defeat, to accept that she was too much in love to defend her interests in any way. "And you are so susceptible to sarcasm when you are excited," Mikasa retorted, knowing that now she would not be punished for this. At such moments, Levi allowed her a lot, for which she would certainly have been reprimanded in the corridors or training. He became much stricter towards her after her antics on the day when Mikasa suddenly thought she could question his authority in front of everyone. But now she was much more accommodating, and Levi often mentioned that he was very good at disciplining such obstinate scouts. Of course, by discipline, he meant something completely different from what others perceived. The soldiers saw how Levi was making her run the tenth lap, how he made her sort through piles of papers, how strict and cold he became, but they did not see how tremulously he touched her, how fervently he kissed her, and how difficult it was to force himself not to scream at the top of her voice when he skillfully pleasured her. Levi grabbed Mikasa in his arms, hurrying to the other end of the office, where the commander's desk stood. Setting her down on the smooth wooden surface, Levi began to undo the buttons of her shirt, covering her neck with wet kisses. Each gesture burned her, making the lower abdomen throb in anticipation. She buried her fingers in his smooth hair while the captain kissed her naked chest. Mikasa didn't even bother to put underwear under her shirt, knowing that she would have to take it off anyway. In these moments, when Levi openly enjoyed her body, Mikasa felt really happy. At least at these moments, he belonged only to her, when his eyes shone, gradually becoming clouded by a fog of desire, disturbing thoughts disappeared. She seemed to melt in his hands and realised that she would never be able to stand up to him, to end this torture. Perhaps she will remain a means of relieving tension until she is devoured by a titan. She didn't want to think about it now. Mikasa didn't waste any time. Feeling her skin burn where his lips touched, she hurried to pull off the captain's shirt, fumbling with the buttons with trembling hands. She thanked Levi inwardly as he jerkily undid the remaining buttons, dropping his shirt onto the sofa. He immediately clung to her again, crushing her soft lips in a kiss. Caressing her tender sensitive nipples with rough palms, Levi enjoyed her quiet moans of pleasure, continuing to explore such a supple body. It was impossible not to feel aroused looking at those graceful curves, knowing how beautiful they looked without clothes. The hard training was not in vain. Mikasa was touching his bare torso, pulling him closer to her. The room was getting terribly hot and stuffy. She could feel her flushed face burning. After all this time, Mikasa has not stopped being shy of his gaze. She had to lean back on the table when Levi pulled on her trousers. Suddenly, the door creaked open. Mikasa immediately froze. Her eyes widened in horror. The commander was standing in the doorway. She didn't know how to act now. Does it make sense to cover up? She was almost completely naked in an unambiguous pose sitting on his desk, and the shirt was out of reach. Mikasa was confused. They don't really know about each other, what should she do? If she doesn't do anything, Levi will understand everything. And even though he didn't seem to care, it was impossible to predict his reaction. And what about Erwin? How could she explain all this to him? She was frightened. She didn't want to lose anyone. It was only with them that she could forget herself, abstract herself from the horrors of the service and feel needed. She knew that the commander and the captain were friends. How would they react to Mikasa dating both of them? Levi's face immediately changed. He returned to his former, displeased and cold expression, turning to the uninvited guest. A moment of confusion showed on Erwin's face before he calmly walked into his office as if nothing had happened. "I forgot my documents," the commander said calmly, before glancing at Mikasa again. Disappointment flashed in his eyes. It was as if she had been doused with cold water. What has she done? How could she have thought that she would forever be able to hide the fact of a relationship on the side? And if Levi didn't seem to care, then Erwin was offended. Realisation shot through her head like an arrow. He was not that upset. A lump immediately formed in her throat. The bitterness was rising, and she felt tears welling up in her eyes, freezing in drops at the corners. Is she no better for them than a whore from a brothel? The only difference is that she was here for free and at her own will. Mikasa was completely confused. Everything seemed to freeze. On the other hand, none of them ever talked about their feelings. She could only accept the obvious. It was her choice. No one pulled her into bed, she made that decision on her own. Maybe they took advantage of her infatuation, the desire not to be alone, to cope with the feeling of fear and loneliness, but she was the only one to blame for what happened. But Erwin, taking the folder out of the closet, instead of just leaving, cast another contemptuous glance at Mikasa, locked the door, turned the key, and slowly approached the table. Mikasa was really scared now. She knew all too well what Levi was like when he was angry. She was afraid to even imagine how Erwin would behave. And it was even worse to realise that the anger of both would be directed at her. Perhaps for the first time since childhood, she felt real fear. Mikasa tried to hide behind Levi, still covering herself with her hands. The captain was looking ahead, completely ignoring her, visibly annoyed. "It's occupied," Levi finally said with displeasure. The whole mood evaporated in a second, and Erwin's imperturbable behaviour alerted. He also closed the door. Surely he's not going to sort out his documents right now? "I think there's a place for me here," Erwin said in a low voice, approaching the table. He gently ran his hand over her bare shoulder, and Mikasa looked at this movement in horror, afraid to move. "What's the matter? A couple of days ago, you didn't mind so much when I touched you," the commander said mockingly, not even intending to let her be. Levi looked at Erwin with a strange, unaccustomed anger. Mikasa had never seen a captain look at a commander like that in her life. Mikasa looked from one man to the other in horror, not knowing how it would end, blaming herself for what had happened in the first place. Suddenly, both of their faces relaxed, and their lips stretched into a faint smile. Suddenly, Levi burst out laughing, covering his face with his hand. Erwin laughed loudly, stepping back, and turning away. Mikasa watched their shoulders shake with laughter and finally dropped the idea of trying to understand what was going on. As soon as the captain calmed down a little, he looked at her strangely affectionately, saying: "You look so scared," Levi said, stroking her cheek again. "I've never seen you like this." "You,.." Mikasa began, thinking that if this was some kind of strange dream, then it was high time for her to wake up. Both men stared at her brazenly, and their gaze made her feel uncomfortable. When she was with each of them individually, she did not feel such a vivid sense of shame, but now she wanted to wrap herself in the fabric from head to toe as soon as possible. As if ignoring the girl's incomprehensible indignation, Erwin took off his jacket with a patch, throwing it on the sofa with the rest of his things, and bending down to Mikasa said: "May I join you?" Mikasa gulped. A strange feeling arose in her chest. It all seemed so wrong, dirty, strange, but how could she say no to them? It was obvious that Levi and Erwin knew about each other, and shame was eating away at her, making her crimson cheeks burn. Right now, she could feel even the tips of her ears, and she was afraid to say a word. She didn't have time. Erwin was already too close, his lips almost weightlessly touching her neck. Doing all this in front of another man seemed too shameful, Mikasa still did not understand what was happening, but all doubts disappeared when Levi ran his palm over the smooth fabric of her underwear, groping her clitoris through it. Mikasa exhaled loudly, involuntarily leaning towards his hands. She immediately felt that the arousal had not gone away. Erwin's gaze made the fire down there flare up more and more, and Mikasa decided to just let the situation go. All she was thinking about now was the two men who were caressing her at the same time, strangely without giving her a big beating. But she didn't know that this was just the beginning. Without waiting for Levi to take over, Erwin hurriedly took off his clothes, stroking his already aroused flesh with his hand. The sight of Levi caressing Mikasa on his desk was strangely disturbing, and Smith wanted to join in as soon as possible. He pulled off her underwear himself, allowing Levi to calmly get rid of his trousers. Even in her wildest dreams, Mikasa could not imagine such an outcome. She had been so cautious meeting them separately, carefully keeping the secret of other relationships, but now she felt like a complete fool. The two of them didn't even seem to be trying to pretend that everything that was happening was a pure accident, although it was now obvious that they had prepared such a strange trap for her.  Mikasa was overwhelmed with feelings. Levi continued to caress her with his fingers, forcing her to arch towards him, while Erwin explored the curves of her body with his hands, tormenting her lips with an insistent kiss. It was uncomfortable to sit on the table. The hard surface rested against the knuckles. Mikasa understood that she was now completely at the disposal of these two, and what could happen was both exciting and alarming. Mikasa didn't fully understand what kind of strange fear made her insides move because neither Levi nor Erwin had ever been really cruel or rude to her. But now she felt like a toy in someone else's hands. Her mind screamed that what was happening was too shameful and disgusting, but the body did not hear its signals, responding just as vividly. Levi, feeling that Mikasa was already more than ready, picked her up in his arms, pulled her away from Erwin, and casually moved a pile of clothes lying on the couch, lowering Mikasa, immediately forcing her to get on all fours. Her body was trembling. She felt the slippery lubricant spreading over her thigh from intense arousal, and her bosom was sweetly compressed in anticipation. Mikasa felt Levi run his hot cock over her crotch, and then slowly entered, forcing her to bend with a soft moan of pleasure. Erwin sat down at the other end of the sofa in front of her face, stroking his long-standing penis with his hand, hinting at her further actions, and Levi, watching, immediately pressed hard on Mikasa's neck, forcing her to drop to her elbows. The hint was easily understood, and she ran her tongue from the very base of the commander's penis to the head and gently wrapped her lips around it. Erwin immediately leaned back from the pleasure that swept through his body. Mikasa skillfully slid up and down it, touching the sensitive bridle with her tongue, and listening to the commander breathing heavily. Everything was burning and throbbing below, it seemed that she couldn't stand even a couple of thrusts. Mikasa leaned back, pushing harder on Levi, and he quickly picked up her pace, gradually accelerating and entering deeper and more jerkily. Feeling her clench tighter, Levi ran his hand over her crotch, finding her finely throbbing clitoris, quickly sliding his fingers over it. Mikasa could no longer contain her moans, muffled only by the fact that her mouth was occupied by the commander. Erwin could feel the pleasant vibrations of her throat, but it wasn't enough. He held her by her smooth hair, setting his own pace. Both men accelerated noticeably, feeling the approach of the peak. Mikasa vividly felt them entering her at the same pace and held on with the last of her strength. The tension at the bottom quickly reached a high point, and she could no longer deal with Smith. Pulling away, Mikasa felt Levi press her back into the sofa again, forcing her to bend more in her back, and jerkily moved inside. He entered abruptly once more, pausing. Levi stayed inside her for a couple more seconds, and Mikasa could feel his cock still throbbing inside and something warm and viscous spreading out. Her legs were shaking with tension. It was difficult to resist the pressure of the captain, and as soon as she had the opportunity, she immediately sank, relaxing. Her body was still longing, but she would never have dared to say that in front of both of them. The men did not seem shy of each other at all, and a logical question arose in Mikasa's head: how many girls did they share? A pang of jealousy and indignation pricked her heart again, but Mikasa did not have time to think about it. She didn't notice how Erwin and Levi had already switched places. The commander pulled Mikasa towards him, forcing her to lean against his hot torso, and she obeyed. Erwin turned her head towards him, pressing his hand into her neck, and bit into her lips with a kiss. Mikasa felt his still-standing cock pressing against her, realising that Smith had not finished yet either, but thoughts of this evaporated as soon as he lowered his hand down. Erwin stroked her with his fingers, lubricating them, penetrating inside. Mikasa exhaled noisily as Smith began to move the fingers inside. She felt him getting stuck in sticky sperm, felt this viscous, salty, intoxicating aroma and leaned towards him, wanting to feel it more. But Erwin pulled his fingers out, sliding them lower, between her thighs. For a second, Mikasa froze, realising what he was going to do, but she could not restrain a forced moan when he penetrated inside, caressing and stretching, giving new unusual and unexpectedly pleasant sensations. Erwin pushed her forward slightly, forcing her to stand up, and ran his cock over her wet pussy, collecting as much lubricant as possible. He slowly entered her from behind, allowing her to get used to the sensations. Smith put his hands on her hips, helping her to sit on top of him. Levi was already settling in front, wanting to feel himself inside again. Mikasa looked at him pleadingly, flushed and completely unable to understand what kind of relationship the three of them were having now. Deciding to put these thoughts aside for later, she reached out with her hands to Levi, wrapping her arms around his shoulders, hugging him to her, while Erwin slowly moved from behind, making her moan softly from the unhurried thrusts. Levi abruptly entered her, not holding back a moan himself. It turned out to be even more cramped inside from the fact that only behind a thin wall was Erwin's rather big penis. The commander also felt the narrowness, and could no longer control himself, sliding more sharply inside. There was more than enough lubricant, and Mikasa did not feel any discomfort, only an incredible, shameful pleasure from the fact that two men were in her at once. The sweet bliss was making her head spin. Erwin no longer held her hips, but stroked her hard nipples, covering her thin neck with kisses. Inside, everything was burning, either from strong friction or from desire. It was so nice that Mikasa just couldn't hold back her moans, even realising that if someone was near, they would certainly hear her. The men moved quickly inside, sometimes catching each other's rhythm, then out of sync, giving incredible sensations. "Hush," Levi whispered into her very lips, before muffling the escaping moans with a kiss. Mikasa trembled slightly from the intensity of the sensations, trying to arch towards the captain, and cling to him, but Erwin held her tightly from behind. Feelings abruptly overwhelmed her, and she jerked forward, feeling everything inside sweetly shrink. Smith pushed sharply into her from behind, anticipating his orgasm, and froze, cumming inside. Mikasa felt the simultaneous pulsation of two men inside and did not want this moment to end. It was too good. The bright orgasm gradually subsided, and only at that moment did she realise that she was clinging tightly to the captain, not allowing him to move. Afraid to catch his eye, she nevertheless unclenched her hands, allowing him to get off her. At the same moment, Smith pulled out, giving himself a little break. Mikasa leaned back, unable to get up and get dressed right away, feeling her insides still fluttering with pleasure. She was afraid to look at any of them, so as not to see disappointment in their eyes, and reached for someone's shirt, at least to cover herself a little with it. "We're not done yet," Levi said, and Mikasa couldn't help but look at him. There was still a twinkle of desire in his usually icy eyes. After all, she didn't know what to expect, but she watched their further actions with interest. She didn't want to think. She felt good now, and she would think about the rest and the relationship later. Too much has happened now to interrupt this incredibly strange and dirty moment. Mikasa nodded, allowing him to take the shirt from her hands. Levi sat down next to her, stroking his hard cock with his hand, pushing her towards him with the other. Readily, Mikasa ran her hand over it, then wrapped her soft lips around it. After the first time, the sensitivity had already dropped, and Levi took Mikasa's short hair in his fist, directing the movements of her head. It was just as pleasant and humid inside. She did this job perfectly, and soon the captain could no longer sit still, he began to move his hips towards her movements, trying to penetrate deeper. Mikasa tried to swallow him, to cover his entire length, although there were already tears in her eyes. His own taste and salty sperm mixed, but Levi slid his hand to her clitoris, rubbing it faster. Mikasa had not yet had time to cool down after the last penetration, and a moment later a new wave of pleasure covered her. She was still holding his cock in her hand, trying to come to her senses, until Levi took her hand away, forcing her to lie on her back. She couldn't help but look at the captain. The depravity and shamelessness of what was happening faded away. He was with her now, not angry that she wasn't faithful, not reproaching. A feeling of tenderness seized her, and Mikasa gently kissed Levi, feeling how he sensually responded to her. At least for this very moment, they both belonged to her, and she could enjoy their attention. Erwin was ready to join in again, and Levi moved closer to the back of the couch, pulling Mikasa towards him so that Smith could fit in. Lifting Mikasa's legs, forcing her to press her knees to him, Levi entered her from the side. The excited bosom, reddened by friction, immediately squeezed him inside, showering both with a wave of pleasure, but Levi froze, not moving further, waiting for the commander. Erwin moved closer to them, fitting in on the other side. Mikasa opened her eyes wide as soon as she felt where Erwin wanted to enter, and the thought immediately flashed through her head that the two of them would not fit there. It felt like Levi was filling it, and there was simply no room for another man. But Erwin did not hear all these thoughts and, smearing the remnants of her lubricant on his penis, he began to slowly enter. Mikasa didn't even dare to move. Her whole body felt like it was struck by lightning. It was too tight, too hot. But the men, feeling that the idea was a success, began to move slowly inside, replacing each other. Levi and Erwin were breathing heavily, feeling their cocks rubbing against each other. Neither of them thought it would really work, but surprisingly for both of them, they fit in, and the sensations blew their minds. It was impossible to move too fast, and the sticky-sweet sensations only made it more pleasant. The men on both sides kissed her where they could reach, heating Mikasa to the limit. What she felt down there was nothing compared to what she felt separately with each of them. A mixture of pleasure and shame washed over her, but inside everything burned and wished that they both moved faster, so that they filled her to the brim. Erwin came first, filling her with his seed, and immediately pulled out, allowing Levi to get more space. He immediately pulled Mikasa towards him, pulling her legs up with his hands, forcing her to keep them clenched. Even though Erwin was no longer in the way, it was still tight inside, and Levi couldn't hold on any longer. After pulling out of her and taking a break for a couple of seconds, he helped Mikasa come again with his fingers.  

••. ♡ .••

  All three of them were lying on the couch in Erwin's office, tired, hot, wet with sweat, but happy. Mikasa huddled close to the captain, at the same time allowing the commander to hug her tightly. She was completely confused about her feelings and what was happening. Now it seemed to her that talking about it would only cause laughter. An unpleasant lump rose in her throat again. There was no doubt about how she looked in their eyes now: not only had she slept with them behind their backs, but now she had agreed to such a thing. There was no question of any feelings. She was ready to cry from bitterness and resentment because, after all that had happened, nothing would change. And even more likely, it will only get worse. And it was even more difficult to realise that she did not want to part with any of them at all. Mikasa just wanted to hide, disappear, close herself off from everyone and not remember that she had feelings anymore. It seemed that they just used her, and soon they would forget about it, remembering it only as a pleasant experiment, leaving a huge hole and shame in her heart. How will she look at them? It seemed that if she looked up even once more, she would immediately sink through the ground. "Are you not going to see me anymore?" Mikasa asked, not looking at any of the men, being too scared and ashamed.  "Stupid brat," said the captain, sinking onto the sofa. He pulled her to him, huddled and upset, sticky with sweat and traces of their semen, and kissed her gently on the forehead. Erwin, hearing this, touched her body, stroking her, as if trying to dispel all doubts. It didn't take long before Mikasa relaxed. But the mind was still taming her with thoughts that would torment her for a long time.  Erwin and Levi were dear to her, but she wasn't to them. She didn't know what they wanted to tell her by this and why it happened, and she only felt used. Is she ever going to confront them? Probably not. She'll then have to choose only one of them, but Mikasa simply couldn't. She loved Levi with all her heart and Erwin loved her. If only Levi loved her back! But she only knew that it wasn't happening.  Devastated by her thoughts, she crawled closer to Levi, as if trying to dissolve in him. The hot body of Erwin was right behind her, flaming the ashes of her broken love.