Daybreak on cemetery

I sat at the table, bored and looking at the sunset, fortunately the sun was setting directly opposite the window. The algebra textbook lay forgotten on the edge of the table. The light was turned off as unnecessary, so my room was not reflected in the glass. I propped my head up with my hand, rested my elbow on the tabletop, and looked straight at the sun. May, it gets dark late. May, it's warm at night, so you can open the window, which is what I did. A light breeze rushed into the room, stirring the pages of an unnecessary textbook, walking along the windowsill on which my favorite flower stands, playing with my hair. I tucked the red strands that were in my eyes behind my ear. The fresh evening air refreshed me, I was no longer sitting like a sleepy fly over... Ahem. My eyes stung from the flow of air. I closed my eyes and smiled. Holidays are coming soon. May, but they give us homework, I don’t know how what. The topography of our area contrasted very strongly with the sky: silhouettes of black trees, cottages, poles with fences with cobwebs of wires, and above all this — the sky, a clear sky without clouds. It’s darker blue on top, then blue, then turns into greenish, rather turquoise, from turquoise to yellow. Then orange. And a little bit red. I've always been amazed by sunsets. Nature chaotically makes strokes of incredible colors around the yellow-white large semicircle of the sun, and it all looks so right... There's just no one to share it with. I yawned. Despite the freshness coming from the window, the fact that it is late in the evening makes me want to go to bed as soon as possible. I was about to get up from my work chair and stretched, when suddenly my raised hands smeared someone’s face. I looked up. Dee as always. He stood quietly, looking at the setting sun, and doesn’t even move. Only the blond's hair is quietly blown through by the spring wind. — You didn’t succeed this time, — I said contentedly. The brother was looking down in confusion. — What I didn’t succeed? — Scare me, — I said hesitantly. This blonde will unsettle anyone. And all my thirteen years I haven’t been able to get used to it. — I didn’t mean to. He annoys me sometimes. With his phrases, views and comments. Looks like he's all so smart and grown up. And now he stood over me, smiling patronizingly, looking into my eyes. I wanted to punch him, but he raised his index finger and threatened: — And I wanted to invite you for a walk. And this is how you treat me. I won’t delay you, adios. He turned around and left the room. I just now noticed that Dee was fully dressed, even warmer than usual. Where is he going? Why did he want to go for a “walk” with me? — Wait a minute! I quickly put on the first sweatshirt I came across with a print of two red kittens. My favorite, by the way. Taking the keys to the house, I closed the door to my abode as quietly as possible and went down the stairs. Dee was already finishing lacing his boots. — He came, he must. Okay, so be it, I'll take you with me. — Thank you for deigning to allow it, Your Majesty Dee, — I bowed to him, making a grimace. He just rolled his eyes and headed towards the exit. Mom and dad were already asleep: dad had just arrived from a business trip, mom collapsed after a biker race. I quickly put on my sneakers and ran out onto the porch. The door slammed treacherously. All that remained was to hope for the parents' sound sleep. — Dee, why not through the window in your room this time? It’s more convenient to fall there, — I asked, having caught up with my brother. Dee tsked and quickened his pace. — Don’t understand what you talking about. We walked towards the exit from the city; it was not a long walk, fortunately we lived on the edge. The sun had already set, the sky was gradually turning a soft purple, thickening over time. The first stars appeared. As usual, I found the North Star. It slowly flickered in the ultraviolet sky with its cold light. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed that Dee also raised his head, looking at the sky. — Where are we going? The brother looked at me askance and answered: — As usual. I took my eyes off the star and said irritably: — Wha do you mean — “as usual?” — How I usually walk. — Could have said that from the very beginning! Where do you usually walk? Annoying asshole. He imagines who knows what about himself and shows off. Can explain it right away? — You'll see. By the way, you're an annoying asshole too. I looked at him suspiciously: did I really say that out loud? And about “you’ll see” — is this again a provocation for another skirmish, or what?! It's annoying. I yawned and lazily asked: — How did you know what I was thinking? — You can see it all on your face, little one. — You’re little one! — Don't move the needle. Look at the cemetery. We came to the only cemetery in our city. Crosses stuck out gloomily from the ground; mounds with artificial crosses made us a little nervous. I don’t like places like this and don’t want to know what Dee found interesting here. — Do you want to bury me here or what? Why are we here? — Can you spend at least five minutes in silence? — Dee snapped. — I’d like to bury you now for ruining the moment. I wanted to show you one place, but apparently you want to talk about the cemetery. — Well, Dee-e-e, I didn’t know where we were going,— I began to whine as expected, — don’t bury me, I’ll be good boy! — I squinted slyly. — Damn, go. We went around the gates that covered the territory of some family gravestones, walked past ordinary single graves, and clung to the burdocks that grew here in large quantities. Dee swore a couple of times, pulling the burrs out of his hair, while I complained about my fate. And why did I come here? What dragged me after this idiot? Pure curiosity, and that's all. The sweatshirt got dirty when I accidentally crashed into the fence, which had not been washed for a long time. Why did I put it on? One could expect anything from Dee. Moreover, I saw what he was wearing. The brother was wearing an old and rather warm jacket with a hood, which he threw on so that at least not all his hair was in burrs, worn jeans and his old combat boots. Now I sincerely envied him; he probably left these things for such walks. My poor sweatshirt and my kittens. My brother walked ahead, somehow clearing the way for me. At least there is something good in this journey. By this time it had already become completely dark. The cemetery was so quiet that you could hear a cricket or a bird changing position in its sleep. The trees around the cemetery rustled their black leaves, the trunks of the pine trees creaked in the pitch darkness. Walking became even more uncomfortable. There were even more burrs, now it was necessary to break through the branches by force, I kept crashing into crosses and stepping on unfenced graves. It became eerie from the silence. Then I noticed something. Dee is missing. My heart sank with fear. I quickly looked around: around me were wooden crosses and cold stone tombstones, they surrounded me, preparing to strangle me in my own fear. I could barely make out the path that wound between them. The lights of the city were also not visible; we entered the most remote part of this terrible place. Followed my brother, so they say. What an idiot I am. What am I supposed to do? I cannot move from my place from fear, around me there is earth containing hundreds of dead people. Then a whisper was heard: — Heavy, holy shit! Then I just fell to the ground and sobbed hysterically, covering myself with my hands. If this is a dead man coming to finish me off, then I'm not ready! I just want to live! — D-don’t hit, hic, m-me!...— I moaned, sobbing. — Jerk! He pulled me up by the scruff of the neck and put me on my feet, hugging me around the waist. Then he spoke normally, in a voice in which I recognized Dee, whom I now hated. — What are you crying like a little child? I was already at our goal, and then I had to look for you, worm. Calm down quickly and let's go. A note of anxiety was heard in his tone. Is he worried about me or because of the atmosphere of the dark night and the cemetery? Probably the second one. I abruptly freed myself from my brother’s embrace, pointedly turning away from him, and walked forward. Even though I didn’t know exactly where to go. Undried tears still burned my cheeks, red anyway. I angrily wiped away the salty moisture and began to fight my way through the thorny plants even more furiously. The rising moon helped a little to see the landscape; the trees and graves were no longer completely black, but seemed to be illuminated with yellow light. I heard Dee walking behind me, and again I envied him: now this idiot doesn’t have to pave the way, because his younger brother does everything for him. Which he brought to tears. I hope Dee is happy. Another tug through some particularly tangled burrs mixed with nettles, and I saw it. I realized what Dee wanted to show me. — This is where I go. I didn't pay any attention to his words. We were standing on a cliff. Below, about six or seven meters away, flowed a wide river that glistened like black resin under the moonlight. And across the river there was a small village. There were no lights in the windows. Everyone there slept peacefully, not knowing that now two pairs of eyes were looking at their tiny houses, barely visible at night: bewitched green and calm blue. Behind the village there were fields on which there was still some snow. And beyond the fields there are mountains, high and translucent, blue and gray. Mountains, so imperfect, crooked and distant, but so beautiful. I have never seen such a beautiful place before. Dee sighed and gently hugged my neck. I didn't move away. On the contrary, I felt pleased; I didn’t want to spoil the moment. The moon looked at us facelessly, and we at her. I know Dee is watching too. He's so weird tonight. Just like the night itself. I have never taken night walks before, but now I understand the beauty of these forays. We are afraid that our parents will notice our absence, we are afraid of heights... But here we are absolutely free and open to each other. I grabbed Dee's wrists and pulled his hands apart, freeing myself. Turned around. He looked at the village, thinking about something of his own. — Let’s sit down,— I said quietly. Dee takes off his jacket, spreads it on the grass, sits down and pats the spot next to him. I sit down. We warm ourselves to each other. The brother suddenly says: — Sorry for scaring you. I was worried about you. The slow worm. — Uh... Well, is it okay?.. — I didn’t know what to answer, since Dee never spoke to me as if I were underdeveloped. — Do you like it?— he pointed to the landscape stretching along the cliff. We sat on the very edge, right above the river. If you fall, it will hurt. Even, probably, very much. — Are you still asking? Of course I like it. I've never seen mountains. Thank you,— I added unexpectedly. — For what? — For putting up with me. I'm a stupid cunt, remember? — The most real one. But that doesn't mean I hate you. We talked quietly, without disturbing the balance of the night nature. Dee let down his hair, which was now constantly getting into my face because of the wind. But today I didn’t mind: it wasn’t annoying. I remembered: — I always wanted to pet it. — What? — Dee arched his eyebrow, looking at me. — Your hair. Will you give it? Dee frowned. — Well, go ahead. — Is it that simple? — I asked doubtfully. Dee doesn't allow anything so easily. But he nodded, looking away and still frowning with displeasure. — Are you embarrassed, or what? — I grinned. It was funny to look at the slightly pink cheekbones of the always cold Princess Dee. He flashed his eyes angrily and muttered: — I'll change my mind now. I ran my fingers through his white locks in a conciliatory manner. — How it cool, — I whispered, already with both hands running through the strands playing with the moonlight, — lie down on my lap, otherwise it’s uncomfortable. Dee looked at me somewhat disapprovingly, but did not argue. He lay down on his back, resting his head on my outstretched legs, and closed his eyes. My fingers ran through his hair, I was thrilled by the permissiveness and such a wonderful place. I didn’t want to break the silence, but I still asked: — Dee, when do you usually come home? — I see daybreaks here, — he answered without opening his eyes, — there are no more than two hours left before sunrise. — It’s good that tomorrow is Sunday. The words disappeared into the May air as unnecessary. I wonder if the awake villagers can now see the two of us? Probably, if one of them had not slept and even looked here, he would still have thought that it was unlikely that two people would sit at the end of the cliff containing the old cemetery and look at the stars. I, still stroking Dee’s head, also lay down on my back. My head came into contact with the wet grass, as the jacket was too small to accommodate two people lying perpendicularly. Thus, my brother's feet and my head rested on the wet grass. If we were sitting the other way around, Dee would have disdained to lay his head on the ground. What will happen to me? My hair is still dirty. I felt my eyes fill with heaviness. My eyelids closed and I dozed off. But I couldn’t sleep, because the early morning coolness made my body covered in goosebumps. Dee was probably cold too. I carefully lifted my body and sat down. Wow. This blond fell asleep. So he will sleep through the dawn, he needs to be woken up. It's a pity. He has a pretty good face when it's really relaxed. The lips do not curl in contempt for everything that exists, the eyebrows do not frown, the cosmetics do not hide the natural beauty — freckles on the cheeks and a little on the upturned nose. I have a handsome brother. I picked a blade of grass and moved it over my forehead, cheekbone, down to my nose, and then my mouth. Dee winced funny and opened his eyes. He apparently didn’t understand what was happening at first; he blinked drowsily, then got up from my lap and rubbed his eyes. The warm knees felt an unpleasant cold. — Good morning. You almost slept through the dawn, so I decided to wake you up. In response, I heard an indistinct “uh-huh.” — Wha, didn’t you sleep at all?— asked the brother, his voice hoarse from sleep. — Well, I took a little nap... But no, I didn’t sleep. Dee chuckled either approvingly or disapprovingly. — Do you always come here to sleep?— I decided to tease him. Dee rolled his eyes and said: — You stroked me so much that it was a sin not to fall asleep. I laughed. — So, so that you no longer walk around all day, offended at the world for not letting yourself sleep, I will now walk here with you! — Once was enough for me, hysterical,— my brother muttered uncertainly. — Come on, you liked being yourself,— but then I changed my tone, — and I’m not hysterical! There is no point in throwing me among the corpses and running away to God knows where, and then scaring me with your “jerks” and “holy shits”! — I said I didn’t want to. — Dawn is in fifteen minutes,— he said, looking at the phone screen. The morning dew cooled my palm as I ran my hand across the grass. My clothes were hopelessly stained with rust, dirt and dust, but I was happy, like a kitten warmed by the warm hands of its owner. The sky became lighter, the mountains on the horizon became even more transparent, hiding in the fog; The morning haze hung over the village; the roosters were soon to crow there. The river was also covered with a white blanket of fog. — Look... Dee pointed his finger at the edge of the sun that was peeking out from behind the mountains. It brightened up earlier than it seemed. The blinding circle slowly rose, filling everything around with a cool light: the trees began to rustle with green leaves, the burdocks became their characteristic gray-green color, the cemetery was no longer scary. The river twisted, ran, and turned silver. The first rooster crowed muffledly in the distance... We looked at this beauty and appreciated every moment spent with each other. We said more to each other that night than in our entire lives, and it was so extraordinary. I looked at Dee. He smiled easily, as he had never done before (at least in my presence, and in anyone else’s, for sure). I hope he's happy. For real. — Let's go to? We need to get into the house before parents wake up,— he turned to me. I nodded, regretting that I was leaving here, even though I was very cold. But I'll be back, I know that. We got up. My legs were numb from sitting for a long time, but my brother was apparently used to this. Now you won't be alone, Dee. The way back seemed much shorter to me. I no longer stopped, listening with fear to every sound, and did not cling to the ubiquitous crosses, which did not look terrifying in the early light. Although the burdock has not gone away. We climbed into Dee's room on the roof of the garage, then Dee immediately kicked me out of his “personal space.” I looked at myself in the mirror. Hmm, my appearance left much to be desired. But it’s okay, I’ll wash it. The main thing for which I sacrificed my favorite sweatshirt. Now I wouldn’t trade my memories of the first night I spent away from home with my brother for anything. Quickly changing into pajamas was not difficult. I fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow. At twelve, Mom woke Dee and me up. My head was heavy and ached, but I was the happiest person on earth. But the brother was again in a bad mood. However, as always.