About good hands

Cho Sam starts it, and he knows it will get them in trouble if anyone finds out. His body is weak, much weaker than before, and it’s often harder for him to do many things he could do with ease before, but instead of all that — he’s gained Cheong Myeong. He’s not alone anymore. And he’d split his body as many times as it takes if it means Cheong Myeong stays with him. Cho Sam realizes what he loves when he stops fearing that those hands, identical to his own, what now with more calluses than he has, might hurt him like so many before him. And even though Cheong Myeong is rather cruel to others in the sect, he is kind to him. He’s kind in a way that no one has ever been to him, and that’s why Cho Sam falls in love. It’s weird because they share the same face, in fact the same body, and to everyone around them they appear to be brothers, but it’s not true, and maybe that’s why he falls in love without any weight on his conscience. He starts it first because Cheong Myeong, despite how many would deny his vision, is too righteous for something like this. Cho Sam knows what he’s going to say before he even hears it. I’m too old for you, — the man who is now the hero of legends will tell him, as Cho Sam touches his lips to another man’s hot neck, sighing at the plum scent that permeates all of Huashan, all of Cheong Myeong. You deserve better, — his not-his-brother tells him as Cho Sam’s hands find the waistband of his nightclothes under their shared blanket, hiding from the cold of winter; there’s no stopping him. It’ll get us in trouble when we get caught, — Cheong Myeong tells him as he asks, light-heartedly, for a kiss; 'when' not 'if'; it sounds like they’ll do it often enough or loud enough for someone to notice them. But is kissed tenderly, and is bitten carefully, and is gently turned over on his back, and touched, touched, touched everywhere, and it feels good. It’s as pleasurable as he never thought possible; as he always believed people were lying, that it could be pleasurable (experience told him it only hurt). He would rather spend his life like this, between the warm bed and Cheong Myeong’s hot body, never again seeing or hearing the outside world that had only recently become gracious to him. Cho Sam cries, because nights like this have never been pleasant for him before, only for those who took him, and this is the first time he’s ever wanted to be useful to Cheong Myeong. “Hey”, and Cheong Myeong’s hands are on his wet cheeks, that one is concerned, and it’s more, much more than anyone has ever given him; he’s grateful; “is everything okay?” Yes, he wants to say, but he’s sure his voice will fail him, and Cheon Myung, as always, will decide something in his head isn’t quite right; so he pulls him closer, hugging him, shifting to take more flesh inside him, hooking his ankles behind the other man’s back; Cheon Myung loses his breath beside him for a moment, and that makes Cho Sam smile smugly. “Little brat…” breathes out into Cheon Myung’s ear, without malice, without contempt, with tenderness throughout. Cho Sam doesn’t know if his life of pain was worth coming to this moment, but he’s glad he met Cheong Myeong now.