Strawberry cheesecake

      Everything shines. Flickers with thousands of lights. The light is so bright that you want to close your eyes. I don't remember the last time I had dreams. It's been too long. Maybe because of work, or maybe from overwork and stress. In any case, right now, sitting by a waterfall on a mountain, I see small stars rising into the sky, forming colorful flashes there. Is it fireworks? It looks like it. The lingering clouds over the city shimmer from such a wonderful phenomenon. Everything is so rosy. There is nothing better than sitting in a quiet, private place with your lover.        Terrible feeling. I get interrupted in the middle. People really can't wait. Or is it time for them to decide?        The last salute is visible in the sky. The largest. It feels like it isn't a salute at all, but some kind of explosion. An explosion of color. And as if one piece flies right here. Fearfully. What to do? Why doesn't anyone notice this?        Help. I'm scared.          Another couple of seconds pass and Minho wakes up in his own bedroom, the first rays of the sun filtering through the windows. Finding his phone, he slowly unlocks it and checks the time.         — It's half past eight. — He stretched out in bed, closing his eyes. A minute later he returns to the phone again. “Oh, today is 14,” Lee looks around the room.          Where is Jisung?         Rising from the bed, he straightens the covers, puts the pillows back in place, and then heads to the shower. Ten minutes later, the dark-haired man comes back into the bedroom, brushing wet locks from his face. Pants and a shirt fly out of the closet, and slippers appear on their feet.        Without parting the curtains, he leaves the room and goes to the kitchen. After the appearance, replicas of another person are heard.                 — Oh, Minho! — Han, standing at the stove, turns his head towards the table where the elder sat down. — Want an omelette? He feels someone coming up behind him, puts his hands on his waist and nuzzles the top of his head, inhaling the smell of cherry shampoo.          — I will, — he puts his chin on the other’s shoulder and explore his neck with kisses. — Honey?          — Yes? — continues cooking blond.          — Happy birthday, — Lee wraps his hand around the back of his head, turn the top of his head and pulling it into his morning kiss. Now he is really happy. The smell of baking and coffee wafts around. A soft, round wad of fur is underfoot, and Jisung purrs in his hands, not trying to resist an early surge of love.               — You said you wanted an omelette, not coals, — the birthday man broke off the bodily connection. — Thank you, kitty. But first, I suggest, all the same, eat.          — Well, look, at night you won’t run far from me, — lagging behind the body, he again sat down at the table and turned on relaxing music on the phone during breakfast.          — I didn’t mean to, you helled sadist, — Jisung puts down two plates, returning to the cabinets again. — Want some coffee? — he opens a new capsule and places it in the coffee machine.          — With milk, please, — Lee picks up a fork and begins the meal. — By the way, I had a dream about you today.          — Yes? And what did I do there?          — We were at the spring fireworks festival, somewhere in Kyoto. There was a big rise with a bunch of benches, and I also heard the sound of a stream.               — I wonder how, — he puts the second mug into the car. — I think it's a sign. We need to go there next year. I just have a holiday in April, — puts a pack of milk and a cup on the table. — Here.       — Thank you, Hanie, — he open the lid and adds milk. — Would you like to go somewhere today?               — Yes! I want to go out of town to the lake. Let's take blankets, food and Suni.        — Okay, agree, — he gently stroked boys' cheek. Do you want to receive your gift now?               — Are you going to take me right on the table? — Ji stuck out his eyes.          — You're a fool? I meant a normal gift, — he jumped up from the table and ran into the bedroom. When he returned, Minho was holding a large box wrapped in gift wrapping. — When you eat up — only then open — he put the box on the sofa.          — No, I want it now. — Taking a sip of coffee, he rubbed his hands together and plopped down on the couch. — This is... — he tore the paper and opened the box. — Minho! — Where did you get it? With a bright smile on his face, he began to take out a new rare Bearbrick that was clearly intended for his toy collection.          — I had to tinker a bit. Glad you like it, — he turned to the younger.          — I love it! Thank you so much, — Jisung ran into Lee who was washing the plate, tightly pressing against him from behind.            And let the whole world wait.          The room is illuminated by the passing sun, cars are buzzing outside the window, which are in a traffic jam. Hands are freely intertwined together, dancing a gentle contempo, and only intermittent sighs from lack of air in the lungs interrupt the flow of the melody.        With no way to stop, the two bodies fall onto the soft sofa without breaking the kiss. Minho's warm palms slowly move from the waist under the T-shirt, gradually pulling it together. Swollen lips run all over the torso, leaving no centimeter unattended. The second head is thrown back, being in an influx of satisfaction. And as soon as the gaze rises a little higher, the bottomless pupils in the eyes begin to take the form of pink hearts.                 — I have to go to work in twenty minutes, — Minho mumbles brokenly, not stopping.        — Can't you be an hour late? — Han groans at the same time.          — If you don’t mind if I'm being fired from work, then I can, — Lee rises to the level of other's eyes.          — Then why did you start? — Jisung asked in annoyance as he brushed dark hair out of Minho's eyes.          — To tease you, — Ho left a short comment, finally touching his lips.          — This is cruel, — Han looks at the receding silhouette.            The dishes still remained in the sink.          Ten minutes later, Minho stepped out into the hallway with his bag and, pulling his coat out of the closet, quickly pulled it on, wrapping the scarf around his neck.                 — Will you come back soon? — Jisung popped out from around the corner, stroking Suni in his arms.          — I'll try to get there as soon as possible. Don't be bored here, — he poked his cats in the noses, - Suni, guard him.          In response to this, the redhead meowed for a long time.          — I'll be right back, Honey, — Lee lifted the hair off the younger's forehead and left a kiss there.        Grabbing his bag and phone from the table, the guy left the apartment, locking it and calling the elevator to go down.        Traffic jams that day really became a problem, especially in the morning, when there is already just crazy traffic. The next five hours went unrealistically long. The weather outside the window managed to change six times, and Minho's mood a hundred times. Finally, having received the last person, he imposingly sat down on an armchair and, taking the phone, wrote several messages to Jisung.     [Hani♥️] i'm done with the work cheers now I'm going and going back do you sleep? why do not you answer if you, as usual, turned off the sound of notifications and now you are sitting playing, I will beat you            Putting his phone in his bag, Ho put on his coat and hurried out of the building.        Town. It was built by people. Busy and expensive Seoul. Hypocritical and corrupt individuals. Disgusting. Gray crowd at the subway. A cloud covering the sun for a minute. Someone's screams. He must not interfere. It's none of his business. Everything goes on as it should. Everything is as it should be. As God has decided, so it will be, if he exists. People came up with a leader who rules the whole world. Why does he then send so much sadness and unhappiness? Mortals are not supposed to know this.        The smell is familiar. The smell of a cage you can't get out of. A chick living in a cage doesn't try to get out of there. Something illogical. For him, this cell is the whole Universe. Why does he need more?          Minho drove up to the high-rise building. Leaving the car in the parking lot, he strives to get inside. Walking further down the corridor, you can see the door of the apartment. House. Unlocking the lock with the keys, Lee goes inside, hangs up his coat and, picking up a bag, goes into the bedroom. Han lies on the bed with a laptop, his eyes closed, a cat nestled next to him. Anime sounds are heard on the computer, and the curtains are still tightly closed.        Deciding to leave things as they are, Lee once again leaves the apartment and goes shopping alone for the upcoming picnic. Returning home again, he sees a sleepy muzzle pouring food into a bowl.                 — Are you already awake? — Lee puts the bag on a chair.               — Oh, you're back, — Han broke into a smile.          — I'll give you ten minutes to get ready.          — Ouch! Wait, I forgot, —Jisung jumped up and ran to clean himself up.               — Suni-i, — Lee called the cat, and he immediately rushed over. — Leash time, honey.          Taking a yellow collar and leash from the shelf, he returned to the sofa and prepared the pet for a walk.          — That's it, let's go, — Han held a black jacket in his hands, and he himself dressed in a sweatshirt and dark pants.          Gathering everything they needed together, the guys got dressed, left the apartment and went to the parking lot. Loading the bags into the trunk, Minho sat in the driver's seat, while Ji sat in the second front seat with Suni.          — He is so obedient, — the blond strokes the cat. — Doesn't even try to get out.          — Not like someone, — Lee patted Han on the head, ruining the entire hairstyle.          — Uh, Minho-oh!            The trip took no more than an hour. The views outside the window changed from city to desert. Wind. Pleasant and warm. Endless road. Hills. Green and tall.                 — I wish summer could last forever.            There is white light outside the window, only Han and Suni are visible. Eyes are clear, hair is white. The face is calm, and the look is charming. He is really happy. Happiness. What is it? Good, bright, alluring feeling. Everyone wants to be happy. People who say they are unhappy are lying. If they were truly unhappy, then there would be no place for them in the world. They wouldn't take an extra breath. What is the greatest wish people have? They just want to be happy.                 — Me too, honey.          Fields of flowers, enchanting. Poppies are everywhere, they are alive. Horizon. He is not visible. White clouds float over the mountains. They are hiding. I wonder if the sea is still the same blue? So calm and quiet? And beyond the sky are the same stars. Wonderful creatures that don't have form and meaning. As is life. But, we love them simply because they are stars. No more, no less.        You can see a transparent lake, framed by green trees.         — Minho, over here! — Jisung calls after running to the lake.           Having spread the blankets on the grass, Khan releases Suni and he joyfully begins to frolic with the guy. Several box with fruit, sandwiches, water, tea and coffee - the whole range for today.         The boy flies in the sky. So weightless and so beautiful. The best view in life. Something unreal. It's a sin not to involve this sight in an endless sunny kiss, lying on the grass, reveling in love and passion. With every movement, the body shudders, and the aura is overflowing with insatiable desire.           As the most charming angel descended to earth. The wings are still in place and gently tickle the sides. No one collects this moment from him, because all this is his. Every time you meet your eyes, you seem to fall in love all over again. Again and again. The heart is ready to stop in a moment, only to make it last forever.         Everything material disappears, the earth disappears from under the feet, only a flushed face, the appearance of lips on which they make sounds, are explored with the most beautiful melody, overshadows everything.           He is ready to die for this beauty.           — M-Minho, stop, — his hand passed through his dark hair. — Uncomfortable, let's lie down on a blanket.           Time has ceased to exist. All that's left are two souls and raging emotions.           — I made for you something, — Lee take out a cake from the trunk of the car.             Strawberry Cheesecake.                 — God, Minho, — Han said, covering his face with his hands. — Thank you, — he whispered in his ear.           — Make a wish, — Minho lit the candle on the cake.           — Thank you, — Ji clasped his hands together and blew out the candle.           — You know, — Han said with his eyes closed, lying in Minho’s arms, — I just love this day. I hear only our heartbeat and the manifestation of only your touch.         — I like when you smile, — Lee looked at the boy. — Your smile makes my life better.           — Why?           — Probably because it's yours. I love you, which means that everything that is yours, I also automatically love. You just are, and that's enough for me. I just love you for who you are.           — I love you too.           — For what?           — Your soul is immeasurable. It doesn't contain dust with the remaining stars that were infected. She will go to the very depths of the earth and may even come back. It is so small and fragile that I can easily break it if I want to.           — Why so gloomy?           — Isn't it romantic?           — Why didn't you reply to my messages today?           — Didn't hear.           — Next time turn on the sound when I leave.           — Okay, — Jisung leaned against the other’s chest, closing his eyes.             Mountains, big mountains. Something that hasn't changed in thousands of years. Sky, blue sky. Something invisible. The sun is only one. Huge lake, water. Something nice. Flowers, but all are the same. And all are useless.           Sky red. Red sky, red color. I don't like red.         The splash of water. Blood, the smell of blood. People. Faceless. Needles. They pierce the skin, tearing the internal organs. A lot of blood. The eye sockets are empty. Corpses, a lot of them. They are no longer alive. There are no walls.         There are walls, they are all covered in blood. Torture. The little bird tries to fly out of the nest, seeing how wide this world is, and immediately crashes on the ground. The corpse remains there until it rots. Maybe other birds will eat it too. She just wanted to rise higher than she was. But the time has not yet come for her to spread her wings. It was too early. At that moment, when she forgot that she could not fly, the bird immediately said goodbye to life.         There is no one, darkness. I can't see anything. I am afraid of darkness. Where is everyone? Everyone left and didn't say anything?             — Minho, — Jisung kisses his cheek.           — Yes, what?           — There is one more place I would like to visit today.           — What place?           — The cemetery. Don't you mind?           — No, of course not. If you want, let's go. Now?           — Yes.           — Good. Then, shall we finish the rest of the house?           — Yeah.           Having loaded things back into the trunk, the guys got back into the car and drove further along the highway. Arriving at the right place, Lee parked the car on the road and, taking Jisung's hand, walked towards the entrance. Without asking too many questions about where they were going to, Minho just followed Han's steps, looking around a bit.          — It's bigger, isn't it? — looks at the gravestones by the path.          — Yes, one of the main ones in Seoul.          — It’s pretty clean here, — a red rose fence frames the entire area.          — You've never been here? — Jisung turns left.          — No, my relatives were buried on the other. My parents usually went there, and I sat at home.          — And at the funeral too?          — Yeah. I was never taken. And after I moved out, no one died.          — I come here often, — Han said again.          — What? — Lee asked.          — We're here.          A black fence encloses a lonely grave, next to which there is a table and two benches. Beautiful yellow tulips grow right out of the ground, and next to it is a vase with a single red rose, the same as on the fence.          Jisung opened the gate, and, walking closer with Suni in his arms to the grave, he stopped. He turned to Minho and waved his hand to join.          — Will you come in?               — If needed. Sorry for the intrusion. — he slowly closed the entrance and turned to the guy.                 Silence reigns around, the canvas is painted white, without a single speck. The willow slowly develops its branches in the wind. Small ants crawl on the bark of the tree, carrying food straight to the house.                 — Whose grave is this?        — Mine.        — What?        — This is my grave, Minho.            Lee, looking at Han in surprise, lowered his gaze to the tombstone.          Gray, overgrown with ivy, plate. It is small in size, it's clear that it was not put up so recently.          Kneeling down, Minho wiped away the dirt that had covered the grave in a thin layer. And one name is engraved on the stone. One painfully familiar name.          Something sunny.          Something welcoming.          Something native.          Han Jisung          — Why is your name here?        — Because I'm buried here, Minho.        — But you are alive.        — I died, kitty, — Khan looks tenderly at that one.        — You died?        — You couldn't die, — Lee rubs his eyes and examines the inscription one more time. - Three years ago?        — I thought you would notice, Minho.        — But…you couldn’t die! — You're alive,— Lee said softly. — Here you are, standing,— tears slowly begin to drip onto the asphalt and lips touch each others, — you are alive, Hanie.        — I'm dead, Minnie. What you see is the result of your failure to accept the fact that I am no more.        — It's not true. I don't believe you, — the body can't stop.        — I guess the real Jisung would also like it all to be untrue.        — You are real! — throat turns to scream. — I see you. You are real. You are the one I love so much.        — Minho, — Han feels Lee's hands clench his jacket into fists.        — I don’t have schizophrenia, — Minho collapsed to the floor.        — The one you love is here, he’s just underground, — he strokes the cat. — Or rather, his body. It's sad, but that's really all that's left. I am a figment of your imagination, just like him.        — He?        — He, — points to the cat.        — No.        — You refused to accept the help of a psychotherapist after losing Suni and Jisung. You decided that you can handle it yourself. You thought it wasn't true. You wanted to turn back time. You wanted to die, then you wanted to live. You thought about throwing yourself off the roof like Jisung did. You wanted to be run over by a car, which is what happened to Suni.        — Shut up! Lee lay down on the ground. — Shut up, shut up, shut up! This is all not true! He tears his throat out in hysterics.        — You wanted all this to happen to you, not to them, because they are all you have left. But now you have nothing.       — Shut up, — Minho grabbed his head.        — Aren’t you tired of fooling yourself, Lee Minho? You should have died then. It's all your fault they died. If only you had noticed Han's condition in time, perhaps he would be alive now.            Dark. And scary. Only someone else's voice pierces the hymen of non-existence. Stranger.        He has always been a stranger to me. Other's shoulders, other's arms, other's body.          — If you had followed Suni back then, he might still be breathing now.            This voice.          It's not Han. It's definitely not Han.        Han would never blame me for his death. It's not Han.          Han is no more.          — Leave.        — Leave? Where to? I am you. You can't get away from yourself. — Han put Suni on the floor that ran to Minho.        — Both of you go. I hate you.        — You lived for three years, not noticing that all this time you were alone. I really feel sorry for you. You're pathetic, Minho.        — If you don’t leave, then I’ll leave, — Lee got up from the floor and headed towards the exit from the cemetery.        — And I will follow you, — said the voice.            Out on the track, Minho, holding his head, opened the car door, started it and drove towards the city.          Leaving the car at the entrance, Lee went up to his floor with a terrible migraine, got out of the elevator, and, opening the door, ran inside the apartment.          Empty. Dark and empty. Nobody is running towards you. Lights are off everywhere. A lonely plate lies in the sink, a mug of coffee on the table. No gift wrapping, no boxes. The laptop is next to the TV. Food bowl. It's empty. There is no one here.          He dialed the only number Minho knew by heart, Jisung's number and the answering machine played:          The phone number you dialed does not exist          — I told you he was dead, — Han appeared at the sink, stroking Suni.          Throwing the phone at the wall, the brunette's legs buckled and he crawled to the bedroom. There, opening a chest of drawers, he pulled out a loaded pistol.          — Weakling, — was the last thing Jisung had time to say before a bullet went through his head. The whole floor was stained with blood, and brains were smeared on the wall.            Then there was a meow and a second shot.        In the next three seconds, a joyful voice sounded:            — See you soon, Hani.            In the apartment, the sound of a third shot echoed off the walls.