Another love

I wanna take you somewhere so you know I care.

But it’s so cold and I don’t know where.

I brought you daffodils in a pretty string,

But they won’t flower like they did last spring.

      The flowers are beautiful. They grow for a long time, but they bloom dramatically, taking on a magnificent appearance. Stupefying everyone with Its beauty, inviting everyone to smell, to consider. It’s a pity they have a very sad function. They burn out quickly, losing their former beauty and strength. They descend to the ground, saying goodbye to the world.       People are just beautiful! They grow for a long time, forming a personality, and they will get stronger dramatically someday. They stupefy everyone with their character, beauty and versatility. With desire to live. That’s what they call to talk to them, take a walk and make friends. It’s a pity they burn out quickly. They lose confidence, the desire to communicate. They give up and say goodbye to their life.       Flowers and people are so similar. So beautiful, but so sad. And everyone passing by thinks the same thing about them:       The poppy blossoms picturesquely, spreads its magnificent petals wide and shows everyone its splendor.       The person shines with positivity. He breathes good from him, greets everyone, smiles in response and proves his friendliness and openness.       And everyone walks by, thinking: “How beautiful, still so young!”       But seeing the lowered petals, the fallen leaves feel disgusted. Thinking to theyself, why hasn’t anyone ripped it out yet?       Seeing a lifeless face, lowered hands feel disgusted. Thinking to theyself, why would he go around so angry if life is charming?

The pattern is endless.

And I wanna kiss you, make you feel alright.

I’m just so tired to share my nights…

I wanna cry and I wanna love!

But all my tears have been used up.

      Love is so beautiful. It’s like friendship, but much more and more important. A loyal friend who loves you in a way no one else could. Always there, he will support and he is exactly the one you want to see next to you always.       Of course, Peter is no exception to the general herd. Who doesn’t want to feel important not only for relatives? Unless those who really don’t need it. But there are quite a few such people.       As a child, May always told him about his parents. About how they loved each other, showed pictures of them. Here are the parents on a date, mom is standing with a lush bouquet of white roses, sniffing it. And his father is standing next to her, smiling broadly right into the camera. And here they are at a wedding. The mother is wearing an elegant white dress, which looks so light and airy. Below the caption: “Eternity consists of small happy moments in life,” so banal, but so saturated with love. Of course, little Peter admired the photos, clearly memorized every facial feature, facial expressions. He imagined them at this moment. But he didn’t think about love. Does the child need it?       Yes, he was unlucky with love. Or this way, or that way. Or the planet will not be there, or the star will fade. Something must have happened and prevented him from finding the love of his life.

On another love.

      It’s so stupid, so childish. So naive. Peter knew he was a silly, but not like that.       Yes, Peter, of course, likes to chase after trifles. But this time it’s not even his fault. Betty, who talked so loudly about love, kindly pushed him to this decision. Hell, it is some kind of classic Netflix melodrama, Peter didn’t sign up for this. But yes. He had to admit to himself. He likes Flash.       But no! No, no, no, no! Of course he won’t tell him about it. It’s just a stupid delusion, or temporary sympathy. Can it happen sometimes? Yes, it can. He’ll just talk to Ned and everything will be fine, he’ll let go. “Um, well, actually, Peter is already in love!”       Damn Ned and his tongue, which is always getting ahead of his teeth! Nothing will be fine anymore, damn, what to do-what to do… “Woah, has baby Pitey grown up? Well, who did our boy have his eye on?” People take out their phones, everyone giggles, everyone looks at him. Enough, please, enough… “Have you got your eye at him? You call him so affectionately, it’s already sickening.” Flash immediately looked down, wincing funny as always and disappeared into the crowd after MJ, throwing the usual: “I’ll remember it for you later.”       Yes, he doesn’t need a Flash, of course. But why does it hurt so much. Why did the breathing stop when Michelle mentioned Flash’s feelings. Why do he want it to be true so much. These feelings will go with him to the grave. No one should know about this.

Another love.

      Liz is just gorgeous. Her every movement, facial feature, character. All her actions, and even her school report card with grades. Elizabeth Allen is the most famous girl of the school. Everyone at least once imagined her as his own, dreamed of dating her or just about communication. Well, Peter is no exception.       To be honest, when he went to ask her to go to the ball with him, he did not hope for consent. But finally the loser Parker got lucky. Allen smiled and agreed. And she smiled so softly, so pleasantly. And Peter just kept falling in love. He didn’t need this ball in general, but Liz. Since she agreed, maybe he still has a chance for a successful life? He deserves love too, right?       The ball was boring as hell. Familiar faces flashed in the crowd, Flash got lost somewhere with his girlfriend, people hid in the toilets, opening bottles of alcohol. Someone was chatting peacefully in the corner. If it wasn’t for Liz, it would be a waste of time. They really had a good time, he learned quite a lot about Allen. She didn’t seem at all embarrassed by his taciturnity, and he likes to listen more than talk. He found out that she wasn’t always the same as she was at school. She is the same person with problems. Her cherished dream is to spend more time with Dad. She doesn’t like how much her mother takes care of her. And she loves cats very much. Now Peter even knows all the stories with her cats.       Maybe he would have had a chance. If it hadn’t been for those five minutes before Allen went home. “Thank you for this evening, Peter. I’m sorry, but I’m moving to Oregon, with my father. I’m sorry.”

All my tears have been used up.

On another love.

      Michelle is one of the most unusual people, not like at their school, maybe even in the whole city. Her manner of speech, strange, but such funny jokes. And her appearance is like the eighth wonder of the world.       Finally, at least someone responds to him with love! She laughs back, smiles, protects him from Thompson and does not help him drown in grief. Peter is so happy. Did he really find his love?       Oh, Peter really likes to travel. So beautiful, unusual. That’s how much he knows, most girls like it too. It’s the perfect place to start dating. And how nice it will be to come back here through the years and see the place where your life began. Peter is sure Michelle will like it. He bought her a magnificent piece of jewelry. It will suit her perfectly.       Here they are standing on this bridge. Here he is handing her a gift, saying forgotten words, patiently waiting for an answer. “Peter, we’re friends.”

Another love.

Harley’s good. Although he can be an ulcer, but he is kind, always there, helping Peter. Parker likes to spend time with him. To buy pizza and watch movies, to sit in the lab, to make stupid jokes at breakfast, to walk in parks, to go to the store. Keener is definitely his best friend. Even when Parker once again failed in a relationship, Harley was there. Harley helped.       And everything next to him seems more interesting, an uninteresting movie has become exciting, tasteless ice cream has suddenly acquired sweetness, the world has suddenly become brighter. Harley laughs sweetly, jokes funny, knows how to defuse the situation and has an answer to any taunt.       How did he become such an interesting person? How did he take an important place in Peter’s own life? If Stark hadn’t introduced them, things would have been very different. It’s fate, they couldn’t help but get acquainted. “Pfft, come on, he couldn’t have been burned so stupidly!” Criticism of films has become a habit, their general habit. The same as accidentally spilling popcorn, as accidentally grabbing a coke at the same time.       Peter, as always, starts laughing with Harley’s jokes, clutching his stomach. Continuing to get lost in a ridiculous laugh tantrum, which is only aggravated by Harley, who continues to develop the plot of the joke. Parker wipes away the gathered tears at the corners of his eyes, blinking several times in order to return a picture of the world. He raises his head and sees Keener sitting habitually. He doesn’t laugh, looks at him, so deeply. It’s like right into the soul. Peter turns his head to the side, trying to catch Harley’s eye, but he insists on looking at nothing. “Peter.” Parker perks up, immediately peering at the interlocutor. “I like you.” Harley looks up, looking exactly into the eyes opposite, looks and waits for an answer, a reaction.

And if somebody hurts you, I want to fight,

But my hands have been broken, one too many times,

So I’ll use my voice, I’ll be so fucking rude

Words they always win, but I know I’ll lose

      Harley is gorgeous. He touches him so carefully, as if Peter were crystal. He kisses him so gently, as if Peter might crumble. Parker doesn’t believe it’s all true anymore. Too good. Too different from what he usually has.       Harley knows that Peter is Spider-Man. Harley always notices every injury, scolds him every time and carefully treats the wound, although Pete objects, saying that it will heal itself. To which Keener sprays even more, muttering about “ignorant-spiders-who-do-not-monitor-their health.”       Every time he gets into trouble, Keener here to save him. And Harley doesn’t care that his boyfriend is a superhero. Even if Peter can kick the villains somewhere out there, in reality he is an ordinary person, on whom the seller breaks down once again.       Peter would also like to protect Harley. But while Keener does not give reason to worry, there are no problems. Even if there is any danger, Peter will do anything to make sure Harley is okay.

And I’d sing a song, that’d be just ours,

But I sang 'em all to another heart,

And I wanna cry I wanna learn to love.

      It’s hard for Peter to open up again, Peter is afraid that Harley will leave too. But every such fear Keener disperses. When Peter is afraid, Harley lies down next to him, hugs him. Harley doesn’t wait for Parker to stop being afraid, he knows it will pass. He just lies down next to him again and again, gently covering him with a blanket, hugging his boyfriend.

But all my tears have been used up.