Sweet-and-sour germs

"What is the matter with this neutrophil?" asked a kind concerned macrophage with brown braided hair.  "He lost something very dear to him. Something that he insisted was giving him a reason to get up every morning..." replied the young soldier 4989 in a sad tone. "Oh, don't tell me..." "Yes, the sweet-and-sour ones were his favorites." Two days ago, the last package of sweet-and-sour germs had disappeared from the vending machines. 1146 loved these snacks since he had been a myelocyte, and now they weren't produced anymore. A melancholic aura was surrounding poor 1146. He had been running through the entire body and looking into every vending machine, hoping to find a last one. But in vain. But why had they been discontinued? No one knew that exactly. Some said that a vaccine had eliminated the germs it was made of, others blamed the vitamins, but the strongest rumor was that the recipe was being strictly guarded by macrophages. So strictly that only a few knew how to prepare said snack, and that actually the last one to know it, had died in combat and taken the secret with her to the grave. This snack was like a heavenly treat for 1146. He had been eating one every morning, together with his cup of barley tea. It was something like a ritual to guarantee him a good day. "A breakfast for champions," he was saying to himself every time during the first bite. And now it was gone. The sad neutrophil was wandering around aimlessly and with a black cloud over his head. 4989 insisted that if you approached him close enough, you could hear him sing "Everything has shattered inside of me~ inside of me~", but no one was able to, his depressive aura was shooing away everyone. Everyone apart from one specific red blood cell. "Sorry, 4989, but... what's wrong with Hakkekkyuu-san?" asked the sweet AE3803, really worried. "The sweet-and-sour germ snacks were discontinued..." he replied. "But these are his favorites! Why were they discontinued?" "Well, apparently no one knows the recipe anymore or something like that." "...I do." The youngest neutrophil turned around to her, baffled. He couldn't explain how it was possible that an erythrocyte knew the secret the wisest macrophages of their world were hiding so strictly. He picked up AE, as if she was a doll, a precious cargo, and carried her at full speed to the neutrophil base, so that nobody could hear the rest of their conversation or the recipe itself. "Aaaaaaaahhhhh! Why did you do that?" asked the startled red blood cell. "Now that I think about it, I might have gone a bit too far... but the recipe was guarded so strictly, so I thought that there's a reason behind it and that it would be dangerous if something heard us talking about it. I was protecting us," explained 4989. "Ah... I see. But it's actually not that huge of a secret, just a bit tedious to prepare. Very few cells like to do it, so almost nobody took the time to learn it or to keep that recipe," the erythrocyte answered calmly, surprising the young white soldier. "Oh... so all these stories were just gossip." "Basically, yes." *** Meanwhile, the depressed 1146 was sitting on a bench, drinking tea and staring with melancholy at an empty package of his favorite treat. "I just can't bear seeing him like that," murmured 2626. "Pal, with your hair, you can't see him at all," replied 2001. *** The youngest neutrophil was looking around in the red blood cell's apartment with curiosity. The two of them had been grocery shopping and then gone to her home, since she had offered to prepare the snack. He actually didn't have a lot of faith in her cooking abilities, since she was a bit clumsy, which wasn't a secret for anyone. But it was worth a try. "Your house is so adorable, Miss, ohhh, what a cute pillow," said 4989, laying down on the soft pillow that was decorating the small living room. The erythrocyte, in the meantime, had gone to the kitchen and was now putting ingredients into a cooking pot on low heat. A smell coming from the kitchen started to attract the neutrophil, and he came closer to sniff. "Miss... how can that be that a red blood cell knows how to cook germs?" "Ah, the truth is that... when I was a child, I was spending a lot of time with my teachers. I didn't have a lot of friends in the bone marrow, because I was very clumsy and everyone was making fun of me..." The neutrophil felt bad hearing that: he had also been made fun of because of his clumsiness back then. But he had been lucky to have his beloved friends, who had included him into their games and looked after him. If he had known AE during his childhood, he thought that he would have definitely played with her. "...And because I was spending so much time with the macrophages, they showed me how to cook, clean, sew, sing, and even treat injured cells. Lady Macrophage often said that she'd use my disintegrated parts in the spleen to make a red-haired macrophage next time, hehehe," she narrated cheerfully, however, the neutrophil felt a chill. "What a macabre joke, my dear..." he thought, feeling a sweat drop running down his neck. "So what's that recipe about? Why so much mystery?" he asked with curiosity, leaning forward into the kitchen. AE turned around to him and put a pink cloth on his hair. Her closeness was making him blush. He had to admit that that red blood cell was a sweet, very kind, and also pretty girl. "I'm bad at cutting, so you're going to help me," she exclaimed with a smile, not noticing the blush in the face of the youngest soldier of the U-division. "Sure. How should I cut that?" he asked, pointing at a piece of germ tentacle. "Into very small dices, please," she answered, while wringing a piece of Pseudomonas into the pot. *** The melancholic neutrophil was standing on a bridge and looking at the horizon. Not even the Basophil had ever managed such a nostalgic expression. Yes, poor 1146 was now the embodiment of grief, of pain from a loss... But his friends were calling that rather the syndrome of a baby, whose bottle had been taken away. "It's so dumb to act like this just because of a stupid snack. Be a man, 1146! Get down there, don't be an idiot! It's enough!" 2048 scolded him from under the bridge. "And if you're going to jump after all, then do a pirouette!" joked 2626. *** The red blood cell was stirring the ingredients in the pot over high heat, and the neutrophil started to perceive a very pleasant smell. He shot a sideways glance at her, it was cute how she was doing her best to prepare the snack... for 1146. "He's so lucky... and doesn't even know it!" "And now that everything's oxidized and the Pseudomonas has melted, it's time for the 'secret ingredient'," said AE, pouring sugar into the pot. "No way this is the secret..." "But it is, this is the big secret. 'Sweet-and-sour' means sweet + sour, you neutrophils were supposed to be smarter than that..." she responded cheerfully. 4989 facepalmed. "But wasn't it supposed to be tedious?..." "It is, it's difficult to make caramel and don't let it get burned... Not everyone manages to, but I guess I have a talent for it," she explained, turning off the little stove and pouring the pot's content into small molds, covering them with patterned paper. Then she took one that had already congealed and gave it to the neutrophil. "Good grief, it's delicious. I don't remember them being that good... AE3803, do you want to marry me?" "Hahaha... sorry, I have a friend who would hate me if I accepted," she answered, putting the snacks into a bag. "Do you hear it? That's my nucleus breaking after hearing your rejection..." said 4989, letting himself fall to the kitchen floor and making her laugh even more. Then he asked from the floor: "And... is your friend pretty?" *** "Get up!" "..." "You can't stay there..." "..." "Alright, as you wish, but don't complain if you get scraped," concluded 2626, grabbed 1146's feet and dragged him to the other side of the street. 2048, meanwhile, was apologizing to the platelets who had been waiting for the "obstacle" to be removed, so they could continue to repair the street. "Hakkekkyuu-san!" That sweet voice took 1146 out of his trance. He was very depressed, sad and now also a bit dirty, but something inside of him didn't want her to see him being so pathetic. "Hypocrite," whispered 2626, annoyed that he was now pretending to be alright. "Sekkekkyuu... How are you?" asked 1146. "No need to act tough in front of me. I heard about your loss and am very sorry... Here, this is for you." She handed him the bag that was emanating a nice smell, a familiar smell... Could it be? 1146's jacket exploded exactly like during his activation, and the erythrocyte didn't have a clue what was going on. 4989 started laughing, while watching his friend trying the snacks. A tear rolled out of the eye of 1146, who wasn't depressed anymore.  "Sekkekkyuu... *sob* this is the best gift I have ever received... Wait, where did you get them from?" "The one who doesn't want to be my wife made them herself, she knows the recipe. Well, she doesn't want to get married to me, but maybe to you, so tie her up, before someone else could come and take her from you," replied 4989. "I see... What? What do you mean, wife? WHAT DO YOU MEAN, WIFE?!" 1146 spat at the younger neutrophil, but the latter just laughed, hiding behind AE. "Don't worry, champion, she said no... She's yours, all yours," 4989 defended himself. "What does he mean by that?" asked the red blood cell nervously and violently blushing. "Ah... Uhm... He just likes to mess with others, don't listen to him. Sekkekkyuu, could you give me the recipe?" asked 1146, still enjoying the content of the bag. "Sure, but... I could also prepare you a bag every week, if you want," she answered shyly. 1146 and AE3803 then left together, talking about the recipe, leaving the other three standing there, baffled. "Look at them. Just walking off like nothing, and that scoundrel 1146 didn't give us even one..." complained 2048. "Yeah, not even a tiny one. And after everything we've done for him, so ungrateful..." added 2626. "Hey, quit whining, here you go!" 4989 gave each one of them a snack, also putting one into his own mouth. And in the meantime, Dendritic Cell was at his base and having fun looking at his photos of the melancholic 1146. "What a crybaby..."